About to give up

[winter whiteout]

Hi all. I have had a bad couple of days. As some of you might remember My husband left over 2.5 years ago for a co-worker and we are now divorced and he is marrying her in a couple of weeks. I have healed and come to terms with all this through going to a Divorce Care group and a therapist. Now I am out there in the dating world in my 40's and having a very high sex drive is torturing me. I am now finding out men don't find me attractive. I have joined many dating sites and when I started posting my picture I received no responses and when I took it down and some men wanted to communicate and then I sent my picture they stopped all communication.

 

God when I was in my 20's I had no problems attracting men. I guess I am an old hag now. I always dress up and wear some make up and try to look my best. Yesterday was a bad day. I show my townhouse to people who are looking to rent (my landlord takes money off the rent) and there was these two cute couples that came in all in love and they were very nice. Mind you I am the only single person who lives in the whole complex and I feel like I stick out like a sore thumb. Then I went to work and this one girl in my department came in all happy with an engagement ring and of course everyone talking about their husbands/boyfriends. Then I took a call from this very nice 26 year old woman who is trying to get pregnant with her husband and she said they are trying all the time and at least they are having fun in the process (she had to tell me she is trying to get pregnant it pertains to what my job is). Don't get me wrong I am happy for everyone and I am always congratulating people on their happiness but I am feeling so sad on the inside. Then today a lot of men on another dating site were leaving me e-mails and when I e-mailed pictures of me they stopped communicating. I joined Eharmony and had only 3 matches which were not even close to being a match. There is so much more to all this but I think I am going to throw in the towel. I wish I could go through life without wanting to meet someone. I have a job, friends and a lot of interests but my hormones and my heart are screaming out to wanting to be with a special man. I think with the sex part it is not just having an orgasm I have multiple orgasms with my magic wand but I want to closeness and the emotional aspect with a special man. But I guess I am not what men are looking for.

 

Thank you all who took the time to read all this! I wish every single one of you health & happiness and all the love you deserve!

[sti_2004]

you'll meet someone soon. you seem cool and you wont last long being single i promise.

keep your head up.

its time for me to cook some brats. i must go now.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

The online sites really focus on looks over anything else. Many of the forty-something year old men on these dating sites are looking for someone at least 10 years younger than them. Also, since your sex drive is very high, perhaps your profile is reflective of that and you are attracting the men who want to simply "get lucky" so their focus is going to be the bombshell look. I am sure you are not hideous looking...these dating sites seem to select for people who are looking for more superficial relationships. I know it is hard to meet people and sometimes the dating sites seem to be the only option...but you can't take rejection on these dating sites seriously. The dating sites today are pretty much equivalent to what the bar scene was.

[xXxLancexXx]

Sister, can I recommend a couple of blogs to you?

Try Evan Marc Katz:

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He's a dating coach and his primary audience are women in their 30's and 40's. You might even consider his services. The blog is excellent and there are other people on there with similar challenges in dating.

 

Also try these two:

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Being single and dating is a long process. If there are factors that you can control that you think are holding you back in dating, you should consider working on them. I went thru a long stretch being single and I had to make a number of changes to attract the women that I wanted: clothes, haircut, physique, attitude, etc etc. It sucked, but I soldiered through it and now I'm getting way better dates. Hang in there.