Really like this girl (looking for your thoughts)

[Oathmaster]

Feeling a little stressed and wanting to express myself, so forgive me in advance if I say something wrong.

 

We met each other almost a little over a year ago online during an occasional event for one of the games that we play, just having small chat, but enjoying talking to each other while at these events, always making the time that much more enjoyable for her.

It wasn't until November when we really started to hang out with each other after going out of my way to help her out one time, and we've been practically inseparable ever since, although we were both involved with someone else so our commitment came to them first, but even then we've always had great times, and she gave me great inspiration and helped me through my relationship thats been going wrong for me, and now I nuts about her...I'm almost worried I'm a little obsessive even..

 

A few weeks ago though she met some other person that she enjoys to hang with, this guy is a little possessive and tries to have her all for herself, she even admitting once to me if he had his way she'd never talk to me or any other of her friends again So I can't help but feel a bit jealous though since she's been spending a good amount of time with him, although she's still with someone even now. But I do know how difficult things are getting with her BF, and guess worried I might not even get a chance to express how I feel to her if she were to break up with him.

 

I actually do mean a great deal to her though despite this, she told me last week that she considered me her closest and best friend, which means alot to me since we're pretty distant and yet to meet in person, and also she told me how the gifts I sent/made her, showing her how much I loved her time, touched her in a special way, that even her BF hadn't made her feel, in fact I actually made her cry in happiness before...twice...

 

For the past few months since we started spending time together we've almost never been apart unless we had to and have been there for each other, she actually broken up with her BF for like a week and I was there for her that whole time, being respectful since she's not the kind to go rushing to a new relationship, so i'm wondering if she's just interested in knowing someone new that she enjoys being with which would explain why spending good amount of time with this new friend of hers, or maybe she does have a thing for him

 

Either way, I still care for her very deeply, and what she said to me makes me feel that much closer to her, and I'm wondering what people think, and perhaps what I should do maybe, for i've been trying pretty hard to have her talk to me occasionally, to avoid feeling like she doesn't enjoy my company anymore or as much, and have been a hassle once because of my jealousy, and I feel she may not be with her bf if things keep up the way they are now, thank you guys for reading

[caro33]

Hi Oathmaster,

 

Can you please clarify what "we've been practically inseparable" and "For the past few months since we started spending time together we've almost never been apart unless we had to" mean in the context of someone you've never met? Does this mean you are online chatting close to 24/7?

 

I guess I wonder where this is headed, what kind of relationship you are after - are you planning to meet? I think that unless you have met in person it's pretty hard for you to tell what's going on or to change the situation in any predictable way. I also respectfully suggest that you are not going to have a fulfilling boyfriend/girlfriend relationship anyway unless things change and you get to see if there is any physical chemistry.

[Oathmaster]

Sorry for the confusion there Caro, we've been online together for these games playing together mainly, always helping each other out when want to do something and generally just having a great time talking to each other while actually doing stuff together not really something like phone texting to someone all day, and not together 24/7 of course, since we work and she has had BF she spends time with too, sometimes I hang out with them both too. Hope that clarified things a bit, starting to get late here

 

And also about the fulfilling relationship, it's interesting you mention that, since she's been having an online relationship with her BF for awhile, and have yet to meet, it's only been recently she's has issues with him, and know of couples who've met online and have worked well for them But for me, I feel she's a very wonderful person, always making me feel good and positive about myself, inspiring me to do more, hell I haven't done much in drawings since trouble with my last relationship till I started spending time with her.

[caro33]

Thanks for that.

 

I'm not saying that meeting online is a problem, but I guess I personally have a fair amout of skepticism about a relationship truly being boyfriend/girlfriend if the people in question have not even met. As Batya33 (a regular here) has said before and I hope I am not misquoting, this is penfriends really. Close penfriends, but penfriends. I am not saying it does not have value, but this kind of relationship can't really be compared to people have at least met one another and determined if their smell/looks/laugh/habits etc are bearable!

 

Do you plan to meet her, and how far away from one another do you live?

[Oathmaster]

we're quite some distances away sadily, I'm in eastern Canada, she's in Central US area, Although there are no plans to meet yet, think that would get her BF incredibly jealous then but it's certainly an interest for me to meet her and we have kinda joked a bit about meeting just to make her BF jealous at best

[lady00]

The two major things I notice here are: (1) distance and (2) her boyfriend. I don't think there is anything to pursue here because of those two things.

[caro33]

They have not met in two years? Or rather, they have not ever met, even though they have been "dating" for two years?

 

Would you be happy with this kind of relationship? Is it what you are seeking with this girl?