really confused

[ashlynn00]

my boyfriend and I have been together 9 months and I am graduating college in less than 3 weeks. He took this semester off and is working full time. His past is full of credit cards, so he is working to pay them off. He is struggling with his bills, so he is just making minimum payments on his credit cards. He brought up to me the other night how he thinks I need to think about being with him, and why I want to be with someone who has nothing going for him, and has all these bills. He won't have credit built up until 4 yrs from now...I love him so much but don't know what to think of all this. He doesn't want to break up, but says he doesn't want to hold me back. Please help with any advice....I told him I don't want to lose him and he said he feels the same....What do I do

[mke11077]

I love him so much but don't know what to think of all this. He doesn't want to break up, but says he doesn't want to hold me back. Please help with any advice....I told him I don't want to lose him and he said he feels the same....What do I do

 

How does he think he would be holding you back? If credit card debt is the only negative thing in your relationship I don't see any reason for you or him to leave. Money makes the world go round, but what ever happened to "love conquers all"???

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Did he get into this financial mess because of school loans or because he overspent on other things? If it is because of school loans and not due to reckless overspending then I wouldn't worry about it..he is still young and will make up that money over time. If due to reckless overspending then the important thing is that he has changed his ways and has become more responsible about money. If so then again I wouldn't be worried about it.

[ashlynn00]

he has college loans and put stuff on credit cards...and he's just making minimum payments because his car payment and other bills take a huge portion of his check. I want to use my left over scholarship money in the summer and help him make a payment on his card. I dont' feel if he keeps doing the minimum, he will ever get ahead!? I want to be with him, but am confused, he might end it down the road. I get the vibe he feels I am more successful than him, and not like that matters, but guys want to be able to support their families and he doesnt see he has a plan or future right now cuz his bills

[Excalibur]

Here's what he's telling you...he doesnt' live within his means now which includes doing more than paying minimum on debt.

 

People in debt...aren't living within their means.....and he's just letting you know that the dating is going to end, and he's going to have to put more money into own situation.......he's not going to travel to see you if you move away to pursue the next phase of your life, etc.

 

He's basically telling you he has no money management skills, and lacks the self-discipline to live within his means.

 

He doesn't need a car payment, while he's in debt. A car, he might need - the payment no, and he could downsize the car type to accommodate no payment...but he doesn't.

 

Soyuor life with him would mean you constantly paying him out of debt, while he lives beyond hsi means...at least, that is the indicator right now.

[ghost69]

he sounds depressed about his situation. plain and simple.