mcx69 Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 Ok, so there are 2 girls that I am a little attracted to. They are both good friends with each other and hang out all the time. Girl A has just moved to our school this year, but I find her pretty hot and friendly. Girl B has been at our school longer, and I have liked her a lot longer than girl A. Basically I want to ask one of them out, but I want to pick the one that has the most relationship potential. I feel if I ask either of them out, the other will no longer be an option should anything not work out. Here's some basic info on them: Girl A -funny and attractive -have fun together and poke jokes at each other in class -sit next to at lunch and she likes to find excuses to touch me -likes to walk extremely close to me when I talk to her b/t classes -doesnt like to talk online or text very much -acts a little boy crazy -its hard to describe it, but she acts a little 'weird' compared to other girls -said yes to a previous offer for a movie, but backed out when she got 'grounded' -I notice her looking my way a lot, and when I look back she'll either look away or hold it for just a few seconds -I have been asked by numerous friends if anything is going on b/t us Girl B -funny and very friendly -I've known her for a long time and have become pretty good friends with her -sometimes she likes to flirt, but other times she doesnt -likes to talk in person and online -we have a lot of inside jokes that we make fun of each other with -not as touchy/feely ad girl A -sends a lot of mixed signals to me -is very boy crazy, always talking about college guys from her mom's college class -she has never had a bf before -we hung out at fair in the fall, but when asked by another friend of hers if anything was going on b/t us, she said she didnt really like me like that. (this was before we got to know each other and become good friends, so maybe her opinion has changed in the last few months) -we make A LOT of eye contact when sitting at lunch and in class, especially when someone else is talking; its like we're looking to see what each others reactions are I've heard many teachers and school workers talking about how much I flirt with these girls, and 1 worker even said she could tell 1 of the girls was into me. The thing is all 3 of use sit together at lunch and in class, and the ppl I was talking to didnt know the girls names to tell me which one, so I have no idea which girl they were talking about. I think girl B would be a better choice, but I think I've been friend-zoned by now. plus she sends very confusing signals and always talks about college guys. But I'm really confused about what to do. Prom is coming up soon and I want to go, but I dont know which one to ask. I know for Homecoming both girls went together as a group with some other girls, but I dont think they'll be able to do that for prom lol. Link to comment
judyness Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 Neither, find another girl. Or it seems your more interested in girl A. You listed her first when you known the other girl longer as if girl A was more important to list the qualities first. The texting and not talking so much will only get on your nerves if you want to be in close communication with someone. They are both boy crazy, but if you do end up going out with one, you won't be able to really hang with the other. You known the other girl longer so you should know by now if she likes you or not. Then picking girl A shes just maybe going to get upset at you for going out with her new friend. You need to go with your heart. Link to comment
boo121 Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 Ask the Girl B out first. If she says "already have a date" or some excuse, ask Girl A out. Simple. You get to choose! Make sure you get into a friendly / teasing conversation FIRST before asking one of them out to the prom. Dont just go "hey wana go to the prom with me?" right off the bat - looks sketchy. I'm sure you knew that anyway Dont worry too much about what either girl might think, if you pick her friend. Life is such that you either get chosen or you dont. Thats why its good to be the selector! Link to comment
judyness Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 Or just ask girl B who shes going to prom with. If she says no one then say oh okay. Then ask girl A the same, she says no one well your screwed. Link to comment
boo121 Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 I feel if I ask either of them out, the other will no longer be an option should anything not work out. Here's some basic info on them: No. if they both like you, both will give you an opportunity. In fact If you ask the Girl A's friend out, Girl A will probablly be more attracted to you. Link to comment
Nick_10 Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 man i wish i had two girls to choose from! good stuff pal hahahhahah! Link to comment
Entropy Smith Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 You seem to be putting alot of stock in the nonverbal aspect of the communication. (She touches me, eye contact, etc...).If they trust you as a harmless friend they will do that and thereforeeee in that context it isn't a sexual thing. Link to comment
judyness Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 i think girl a you have more of a chance with because girl b friend zoned you. so you don't have the option of 2 girls. Link to comment
mcx69 Posted March 8, 2008 Author Share Posted March 8, 2008 I've already talked with girl B about what she was doing for prom. One night she was online looking for a dress, so I jokingly asked who she was going with, and she said no one. Then she asked me what I was doing. I thought about asking her then, but I felt asking someone to prom was not a thing to do on msn. I know neither of them are going as of now, but like I said, I dont know who to ask. If they weren't such good friends with each other, I could ask one, and then the other. But they are basically best friends so I cant do that lol. I asked girl B if she was going to go to a play, and she said she didnt know. I then told her I wanted to go, but none of my friends were going, and thats why I was asking her. Then she told me she might be going with girl A and other friends, and thats what they did. I just wish I could find a clear signal as to if either liked me, and then I would make my choice. Link to comment
jenny_mcs Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 Not to rain on your parade, but it seems after reading your original posts and additional comments, that you have asked both these girls to do something and they have both either declined or canceled. Link to comment
mcx69 Posted March 8, 2008 Author Share Posted March 8, 2008 well, actually the one that got grounded was a legit reason, i just never got around to asking her again... i got kinda busy. and the other girl was already going with her friends and bought tickets, so i doubt she woulda gave up a ticket just to buy a different ticket to go with me. Link to comment
RealBrookeI Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 Not to rain on your parade, but it seems after reading your original posts and additional comments, that you have asked both these girls to do something and they have both either declined or canceled. Thats what happens when you dont choose fast enough. Link to comment
jenny_mcs Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 well, actually the one that got grounded was a legit reason, i just never got around to asking her again... i got kinda busy. and the other girl was already going with her friends and bought tickets, so i doubt she woulda gave up a ticket just to buy a different ticket to go with me. If the girl you asked to the movies really wanted to go with you, she would have said something like "I'm grounded, but let's go as soon as I'm allowed out.." or, she would have approached you once she wasn't grounded anymore and suggested you guys go see that movie now. The girl you asked about the play----this is what you originally wrote: "I asked girl B if she was going to go to a play, and she said she didnt know. I then told her I wanted to go, but none of my friends were going, and thats why I was asking her. Then she told me she might be going with girl A and other friends, and thats what they did." You asked if she was going to the play and she said she didn't know. You were hinting pretty big that you wanted to go with her, hinting that you wanted to go and had no one to go with. Then all of a sudden she is going...with her friends. Sorry, maybe something has changed, but I don't think either of these girls wants to go out with you. Link to comment
mcx69 Posted March 8, 2008 Author Share Posted March 8, 2008 yea, idk... maybe i'm just trying to justify things the way i want to see them Link to comment
Entropy Smith Posted March 9, 2008 Share Posted March 9, 2008 All it will take to turn things around with both of them is to inflict alittle pain, alittle tension into the situation. But ye mortals are such a sensitive bunch... Link to comment
mcx69 Posted March 9, 2008 Author Share Posted March 9, 2008 All it will take to turn things around with both of them is to inflict alittle pain, alittle tension into the situation. But ye mortals are such a sensitive bunch... care to explain any of that? lol Link to comment
Entropy Smith Posted March 9, 2008 Share Posted March 9, 2008 Before you ask one of them out start acting distant. Don't eat lunch with them, don't return their phone calls. put up a wall in class...when they do catch you say, "gotta go, catch you later." Stay relaxed but indifferent. They will think maybe something is wrong, start to talk between themselves, tension will build...its just a way of rezeroing the relationship. Link to comment
mcx69 Posted March 9, 2008 Author Share Posted March 9, 2008 how long should i do that for? i'm going to have ask one of them to prom like w/in 2 weeks, is that enough time for this to work? and i'll still probably have to eat lunch with them, but would reducing the amount i talk to them and such have the same effect even though i'm still sitting there? Link to comment
Entropy Smith Posted March 9, 2008 Share Posted March 9, 2008 2 weeks is plenty of time. You need to go MIA. Hide in your car. Hang out in the library where all the lonely geeks sit. Attraction grows in space. Unexpected space jolts emotions. No it won't have the same effect! You need to keep that effect for one you do have to be near them like in your class. Link to comment
mcx69 Posted March 9, 2008 Author Share Posted March 9, 2008 i'll think about it. seems like it would shock them on the very first day though lol. actually i know it would, so 2 weeks seems really extreme. so how would i end the nc period? by asking one of them to prom? Link to comment
Entropy Smith Posted March 9, 2008 Share Posted March 9, 2008 Yes, ask one to the prom. You don't have to go the full two weeks. But a couple of days to let some drama build. If they say yes, still remain alittle detached, don't let things revert to being friends...you'll have rezeroed the relationship now you can teach her to be your gf. Link to comment
mcx69 Posted March 10, 2008 Author Share Posted March 10, 2008 so do i come out of the blue and ask the girl after the disappearing act, or do i come back around for a day and then bring it up in a convo? edit: one of the girls contacted me about 10 mins ago online. she asked a question about a paper that is due this week, and i only gave her the info she needed, and answered in really short answers. then i quickly said i had to go and i stopped talking to her. should i have helped her out or just should i have ignored her? tomorrow is the first day i'll be able to put the nc to real life situations lol. so i feel like i had a good start tonite. they only reason i should have to talk to her at all is about a group project we are working on that is due tuesday. other than that, i should be able to pretty much ignore her. Link to comment
watupgangsta Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 i haven't really read much of this thread but from what i read of your original post it seems to me you're better off with girl a. girl b seems like friend material. it seems like it might be a complicated, the sooner you forget about her in a romantic nature, the better off you'll be to have a good friendship. as for the other girl, you don't need to do the whole "NC" thing. just keep it to a minimum. don't let this girl think that you're an easy catch. spend more time with girl b. then ask her to prom if you're feeling it. if that doesn't work out, ask girl b if she wants to go. keep it in the friendship mindset tho. Link to comment
Entropy Smith Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 I would come up out of the blue and do it. But you must do it with absolute confidence. You are doing great. Good job on the really short answers. Link to comment
mcx69 Posted March 11, 2008 Author Share Posted March 11, 2008 eh, so basically the nc thing didnt happen. i got about halfway though the day monday, and eventually all of my friends were asking me what was wrong, b/c usually i can always be seen talking to either of these girls. but girl a and i have been really flirty this week, and she's upped her touching and i've been making myself closer to her so she can do it more. ive also been really playful with her and poking fun at her furry boots lol. hopefully she knows im joking, but w/e. a new movie came out this weekend so i'm gonna see if she wants to go. hopefully i wont get the "i got grounded" line again. but if i do, i'll know where she stands lol. Link to comment
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