SCARED TO LET GO!!

[99blackvette]

Hey all this is my third post.My girl still isn't talking to me (she says she is scared of losing me and she thinks i think too highly of her)This is the third week we havn't talked and i'm getting really tired and bummed out.

I told her to call me when she was ready to be together,but i havn't got the call yet.

I love her more than anything,but is it time to let go?Am i being too quick to make such a huge choice\mistake?(3weeks)I think about her constantly and no joke i've been bummed out for the last 3 weeks!

I went camping in the chats last sat with some friends and i had enough beer to make me"happy",but i still had her on my mind.

I rarely drink but i think i wanted to get away from the emotional pain i'm going through.I dunno any help would be great cuz it's tearing me up

 

Thanks

[routerx]

This is a pretty good lesson... one that we all go through sooner or later. The fact is, no woman, should make you feel torn up inside. You are giving her too much power. Please redirect that energy back into yourself and your goals or into God. If she is the one for you, she will respect your goals and/or your love for God and follow you.

You are much too valuable to give ALL of your value away to anyone.

[OceanSea17]

Hey. I'm a female, but I'm going through the SAME thing you are. I havn't talked to my bf..or ex I guess, we're kind of taking a break but we decided to after he broke up with me..I had to convince him cause I don't want to lose him! Our situation is really complicated and I havn't talked to him in a while. I don't know when I'll talk to him next, but...all these forums I go to tell me to just move on, but I don't want to! Part of me wants to feel good and move on but I love him, he's my everything. I've been keeping busy, which is a good thing to do, I'm sure you have also, I'll try to keep you up to date about the situation with me but, I'm just kind of keeping my mind off of it. I've talked to people who have been through this, but it's nice to know someone IS going through it right now. I'll keep you in my prayers, which I've been doing lately for my mental health sake (I don't normally, I'm not that religious). Like everyone's saying to me, just try to keep your head high, we'll get through it.

[Mar]

Alright, the first thing that jumped out at me about that post was your first sentence. Read it again. Basically, what you said was that your girl doesn't want to lose you because she loves you, but she's afraid to talk to you because she thinks you've put her on some sort of pedestal or have high expectations of her. What is the problem here? What caused the initial breakup?

 

If you love her, let her know. Also let her know that you realize that she's human, has her faults, same as you do, and that the key to any relationship is working THROUGH those faults and disagreements. If there was an issue of dishonesty or abuse, yes, that's different. But, since I'm not getting the feeling that's the case here, then what IS the problem? Why did you two split, and why is she giving you such mixed messages? Let us know that, and we may be better able to help you out on this...!

 

Mar

[Mar]

Alright, the first thing that jumped out at me about that post was your first sentence. Read it again. Basically, what you said was that your girl doesn't want to lose you because she loves you, but she's afraid to talk to you because she thinks you've put her on some sort of pedestal or have high expectations of her. What is the problem here? What caused the initial breakup?

 

If you love her, let her know. Also let her know that you realize that she's human, has her faults, same as you do, and that the key to any relationship is working THROUGH those faults and disagreements. If there was an issue of dishonesty or abuse, yes, that's different. But, since I'm not getting the feeling that's the case here, then what IS the problem? Why did you two split, and why is she giving you such mixed messages? Fill me/us in a little more, please, if you're comfortable with it......

 

 

Mar

[99blackvette]

Hey!

 

Were not actully broken up,i'm not sure what you call it.I dunno what i said i always tell her how perfect she is and stuff,but other than that i can't see a problem.We get along great and all seems good to me and then she does this.I mean we talked for 2 hours on the phone every night.

I dunno i'd never abuse her verbally or physically i'm for the most part in a great mood all of the time(until 3weeks ago)

[Quest]

Perhaps I shouldn't be giving advice, since my girlfriend broke up with me and hated me the next day, but all I can say is that your story is confusing. Basically if you want to be with her, you have to tell her that. Tell her that you love her, but you can't wait for her forever. Since she has no reason to really leave you, the problem is hers and she needs to deal with it. You can wait around and see if she comes back, or you can move on. She may never come back to you though. You have to get together and have a serious talk.