Im Going Nuts With This Nc Thing

[Tony_TJ_MX]

So what's with this freaking feeling ? I was doing so good and now I feel the urge to call her, well, mostly at nights but I was doing great !!! The images of her just keep pounding at me, her skin, her scent, this is so wrong. I know i've said this many times, and you keep telling me that it will pass eventually, but I know that if I see her some day, it's gonna take me back to where I was 2 months ago. I love this woman, I would have married her if I could have ...

 

And just knowing about her made me feel weak again, I was feeling strong, but reading her message, noticing that her anger had passed, it made me think about trying to get back with her, but things are getting more and more complicated, I'm moving to another city soon, she's already like 1500 miles away ... anyways, I'll keep doing what I've been doing, but it's not getting any easier I must say, this love has not died in any way, in fact, as time passes it gets stronger, but I'll keep it in my heart ... so sad.

 

Tony

[Clabs]

Hey Tony

 

Sorry to hear about all of this. It sucks - no two ways about it. But you have been given great advice and you are taking it.

 

It is true what DG said - this stuff ebbs and flows in waves. You feel good - you feel stronger - you feel great - and then you feel weak and like cr@p again. There are times when you feel like you are going backwards again.

 

Trust me fella - give this some more time and it will get easier. We are all impatient in love - falling in love - and wanting to fall the hell out of love if it all goes t1ts up!

 

Take it easy fella - look out for you now.

 

Mark

[dreamguy]

It's probably going to take a lot more than 2 months for you to stop feeling these panic attacks / urges to call her.

The good thing and unlike many others, such as myself in the past, you are not acting on impulse.

 

Be proud because you have apparently achieved a better state of mind than most people during the recent phase that immediately follows a break up. Now you need to sustain it.

[TijuanaJones]

Well, it took me 10 months to forget about my ex for good. I tried twice to win her back with no success. If the dumper comes back it will be out of her own volition.

You'll have days that are so hard you may even think horrible things (suicide, violence, dramatic changes in your lifestyle, etc), but don't be tempted. Great days are yet to come... I like to hear a song called "The Best Is Yet To Come" by Nancy Wilson... I dedicate it to a future lover I have yet to meet.

Be confident that the future will bring great things. It's ok to feel frustrated, angry, worry, weakness, hate, sadness, hopelessness... you are on a mourning period and it's ok to accept that things didn't work out as you may have wanted, but that doesn't mean that they will never work in the future. This experience will make you grow as a human being and help you mature, relationship wise.

 

Don't act on your impulses and keep focused on getting yourself in better shape, both mentally and physically. Repairing your self esteem and confidence is the most important thing right now, as people tend to notice that everywhere you go. My friends told me that I looked terrible after my breakup and that now I'm back to where I was before and even better. So ride your emotional roller-coaster... it will be over before you know it...

 

Te deseo una excelente semana y espero que puedas recuperarte pronto. Las experiencias difíciles son un atajo hacia la madurez, así que tómalo como algo bueno.

 

Saludos!

[Tony_TJ_MX]

I see her everywhere !!! I mean not literally, but she's so in my head still, and this hope that just doesnt want to die. Anyways, I had a lot of fun today, but when the day is over and I'm going home alone it hits me, every weekend was spent with her, we always had something to do, movies, dinner, just talking about anything, this is so horrible and difficult.

 

Have a great weekend everybody

 

Tony

[dreamguy]

You are going to see her everywhere.

Memories of you and her together are going to pop in your mind out of nowhere and when you least expect them.

 

I bet you recall things you never thought about when you were still together. That's because you know she is not around anymore.

 

It's like all this time, every single second you had with her was being secretly recorded by your brain and now it's all being played back and there is no "STOP" button to press.

 

I know perfectly how you feel. Hang in there and let it play... sooner or later the batteries will die and the movie will stop running all by itself.

[Tony_TJ_MX]

Oh my god but it's like the batteries are moon powered in the day I'm under control of my emotions most of the time, but when the night comes daaaaaamn, my mind starts playing tricks on me, but I hope you're right gotta let the batteries run, even those batteries will die out eventually.

 

Thanks for cheering me up.

 

Tony

[Tony_TJ_MX]

Ok, so I rediscovered that breaking NC is just wrong, no not wrong, the worst thing to do. I had a conversation via instant messenger with my ex. Like two "friends", but she told me we are not friends, anyways, it's like she just left me with more hope, and that sucks, because I'm trying to move on, to get over her, I'm not doing really good actually, and with that conversation my world was shaken again, by the all mighty power of a lovely lady with whom I'm still deeply in love.

Now what ? I have to go NC again, why ? because I'm still too attached to her, any sweet word that comes from her makes me wanna run to her and try to win her back. Why you ask? because I asked about all this time and space she asked for, what was it for, if it was for us to heal wounds?, or to get over our feelings and try to be friends some day. The answer ? "No, this is not for that" Then ... WHAT'S IT FOR ?!?!?!

 

Anyways, I wont make promises that I will not contact her anymore, but she opened the door for me to do that, she was just too different from 2 months ago, she was sweet again, not like girlfriend nice, but I noticed she held it up, she wanted to be like always.

 

Well, I think I pretty much know what to do, keep focusing on ME, what I want and wait until destiny and my decisions lead me to happiness.

 

A friend told me that she's being nice because she wants me to be there for a rainy day, but she lives in another state, so I dont really think that's the case, but maybe he's right. Or maybe time has helped. Today she told me "time's an ally, it helps a lot"

 

Well, now that i've let this out, I'll continue my life as it was before this conversation.

 

Tony