Help, I'd really like your advice.

[Krystal_Ivy]

Ok, so I'd like to know everyones take on this, My boyfriend and I are very close and spend every evening together (after work) well He has an opportunity to start college this summer, problem is he would be working full time 8-5 and going to school full time, 6-9 then taking half an hour to get home, I'd probably see him for 45 min then he'd have to leave to go to bed. It's either he takes these classes and is done in 5 months or he takes one at a time and it would take close to two years!! we really wanna start our life together and get engaged soon so the 5 months would be ideal so he can get a better job. but it would kill us to see each other for only 45 min a day.

 

I know it sounds immature or weird to some of you but we truly feel that time in a relationhip is so precious and valuable. I know people deal with harder situations than this like LDR's but I've never been on to handle LDR's. Any advice? it's really hard

[friscodj]

Hey KI-

 

My advice is suck up the 5 months and get it done. Think of the bigger benefit of a better job with better pay and possibly better hours later on. All for 5 months, which will go by quickly, in the grand scheme of things is a very short amount of time.

 

I also think this will be a good opportunity to redefine your life and happiness outside of the relationship, i.e., find yourself outside of the relationship while still being in the relationship. Use the time away to find and develop sources of happiness in your own life, become more independent and detach from whatever dependence you feel in the relationship and upon it for happiness. This will go further than you think. You may not see the benefit now, but down the road I believe you will.

 

I ultimately think you can personally grow from this and balance your life out while at the same time smoothing the pavement for a future together with the increased professional stature and building the excitement and rekindling the new excitement and value of the time you do spend together. So I say not only take the 5-month option, but enjoy some time to yourself with yourself in the process.

[melrich]

Yes I agree. And let's face it, if you guys get married and spend the rest of your lives together there are going to be plenty of occasions where you will have to sacrifice time together.

 

I think you should put up with a bit of short term pain for the long term gain.

[InaneCathode]

You'll have all the time in the world with him Krystal, treasure the time apart with him as well. It might not seem like it now, but time apart from a loved one is almost as valuable as time with.

[Mythical_Suicide]

I agree with everyone else, suck up the 5 months and get it done with. It isn't going to kill you guys to not see each other every waking moment for a few months. My ex and I went from seeing each other everyday to once a week and honestly I liked that better as I like having me time. Once you two are married you'll be wishing you would have taken the opportunity for some time apart.