bb13

My GF and I have been dating for almost 3 months and it has been great. We were so close. Recently I went on a 9 day cruise and she made a new male friend while I was gone. This friend wants her. I've met him and he seemd cool but he still told her that he wanted her and taht pissed me off. I know that she would never cheat on me but thats not the problem. Ever since I got back, we have been sorta distant. We both thought that we had been spending too much time together but the timing of it (cuz of my trip) doesnt feel right. She talks to this kid alot (lets call him "A"). "A" can also get alcohol.

My GF and her best friend("K") wanted to drink so they talked to "A". My girl said they wanted a "boy-friend-free-night" and I was ok with that. I would have liked to gone but w/e. Anyways she calls me when she's sick drunk and when she needs comforting she all-of-the-sudden says "I wish you were here". She drank way too much and felt aweful. I told her that I didnt believe her b/c she had said she didnt want me there to begin with. She also told me that "A" and "K" had dissappeared and when she found them they were on the floor and "K" had her pants off. (She also has a BF) Me and my GF got into a huge fight about alot of stuff including trust, drinking, spending time without eachother, and other things. She didnt seem to care that I was upset. She was getting mad that I was upset with her. She doesnt believe me when I say I trust her. I do...I know from experience with her that she wont do anything with someone...I sorta made a move on her when she was with her ex.

I kno this sounds like rambling on but if you read this, PLEASE post a comment...I couldnt sleep all last night and I'm even in tears over this....I just dont know what to do...PLEASE HELP!!!...anyone

I'd say go for it. She could very well like you mor than friends. I was in a similar situation with my current GF. We were good friends with a lot of flirting. I told her I liked her and eventually that I loved her and, after overcoming a couple obstacles (like her BF at the time) we started going out. And I am soo happy that I am with one of my best friends. You always fail at the risks you never take. You may regret this for a long time to come. Go for it

My GF and I have done just about everything including sex. When we first started having sex she said she'd only orgasmed like twice before (and she was kinda experienced) Everytime we are intimate, I focus on her and she says that she orgasms alot. She even said she orgasmed from me fingering her when she had said fingering used to do nothing for her.

Do you think she's really orgasming or just trying to make me think she is???

Congrats!. I believe that some of the best relationships develop out of friendship. I hope yours does

No not all guys are like that. I would say that most guys aren't but the few that are make the rest of us look bad. I think that love is extremely important. I would go with dikaia880's advice that if they keep wanting to be with you w/o sex, then they are after alot more than one thing.

Your in a awkward position now. I normally would say back off and give her space to see if she really likes you but after having sex with her you may come off somewhat sleazy if you dont call her. I would say talk to her. Ask her if she really does love you. It would be best to be in person so you can read her eyes, body language instead of just hearing words. If after that you believe her and want to with her too, then tell her. You should not fool around with her if you dont want a relationship though. It will hurt her beyond belief.

In my relationship we both are pretty stubborn about paying. We both want to. We both make equal money. I am somewhat traditional and think that the guy should pay but she doesnt like anyone to spend too much on them. So i guess, all-in-all, we pay pretty equally.

I'm not worried about breaking up at all. I know she loves me and we did talk about all of this and there were alot of tears and we both know that we want to be together. There may be other fish but they are all minnows compared to my girl. She is amazing and I dont ever want anyone else. She was my best friend before we got together and we love each other soooo much. We arent going to break up for a long time if ever and I can garantee that. She broke up with him for me. I just dont know how to feel about this ex. I hate to admit but her talking with him does get me mad. and I hate being mad when it concerns her. How, if possible can I fix this?

My GF of about a month has recently had a good amount of contact with her ex. He called her the other night and they talked for a fairly long time. Last night he just showed up at her house and they talked some more and he tried to kiss her I guess i am being a hypocrite here b/c I tried to kiss her too when she was with him but I was still pissed. Do you think I should be worried about this??? Or any comments would be helpful

Thanks

-bb13

I understand that her drinking hurts you and I can see that alcohol has seriously affected your life but I do think that your going overboard with this. If she has fun by drinking, then let her as long as it doesnt get out of control. Alcohol isnt evil. Too much can be and if the user becomes dependant on it and becomes an Alcoholic than that i think would be the problem. If you still cant live with the fact that your GF likes to drink than you either have to convince her not to(not to the point that she does it secretly but to completely stop) or i guess you'll have to leave her. I personally dont like it when my GF drinks either but I wouldnt leave her for it.

Thank you everyone...this has been very helpful...I am going to try and bring this up to her 2nite. Thank you all again

-bb13

I guess I prefer the girl to be a little bit shorter than me (5' 8") Maybe I feel this way b/c the one girl I'm in love with is but I dont know....Personality comes first though, then looks...and Height is probably around 5-6 on the list IMO

Let him know that she MAY hurt him and you dont want him to get hurt. DONT tell him not to go out with this girl. For all you know they may actually like each other. Even though you say your fine with being just friends, I'm guessing you still want more. I know from experience and I know how hard it is to "just be friends". But you cant tell him what to do. Maybe if he gets hurt he'll realize more in you when your their to comfort him. Or maybe he'll end up happy with this girl which, if you care about him, is all you want. I hope this helped.

-bb13

It isnt always true that nice guys finish last. I aam one of those "nice-guys" and id came out on top in my case. I have liked one of my best friends since December. She was with a so-called "bad boy" who was a real jerk. She has really only been with that type. She very often cried herself to sleep and I was almost always there to comfort her. While she was still with him, she told me how much sweeter, considerate, nicer, caring I was than him. Eventually she broke up with him and about a month later me and her starting going out She told me that she has liked me about as long as I've liked her but was sorta suppressing it b/c she was in a relationship. Well, I am a true story of a "nice-guy" that finished first

The waking up to oral thing didnt come out of nowhere. I shad had her remind me to set my alarm and then we got talking about sleeping/waking up adn some other stuff so it wasnt like she came up to me randomly and said that.

As her close friend I was aware that she was intimate with a couple other guys. Its kinda worse b/c, being in High School, I know some of them. I, though I'd rather when we had sex it was the 1st time for both of us, am fine with her past. I just dont like her bringing it up.

My main worry in all this is that she'll always be thinking of her XBF's and experiences with them. I can honestly see us dating for a really long time. Do girls eventually let what happened in the past "die". This is hypothetical but if we were to get engaged/married some day (or me with any girl for that matter) would she always be thinking about the past???

**There have been some new events in my relationship. Please tell me what I should do**

*My GF talks about past BF's. Mostly bad stuff about them and how I'm better but sometimes its stuff like "Me and so-and-so did this once without my mom hearing us" or "one time i woke up to (getting oral)" This is annoying and upsetting me.

*How can I tell her it upsets me w/o offending her or hurting our relationship and communication? We both love the fact that we can talk about anything and I dont want her to feel that that's not the case.

*I love her soooo much and she loves me too. We were best friends before dating. I can see us together for a long time and I want to be that way. I love our relationship except for this problem. Please help me in any way. Thank you

-bb13

I agree with Michael. She shouldnt be flirting with her ex. Personally, I dont explode with anger over anything. I try to act with reason and be calm but this would anger me. You can work on your trust but she has to work on it with you. You cant just try to trust her. She has to show you that she is committed to you at the time. You cant do it alone.

As someone who currently is feeling a little insecure b/c of my GF's relationship with her ex, I know that something like this could really hurt your BF. I know you think that it's nothing that he does this but your BF will....especially if its your ex thats doing this. I think your friend is just lookijng out for you.

Yea go ahead and wear that color. Dont like get body painted or anything...lol but wearing that color shows her you listen and care what she has to say. If she says something about you wearing more often, you could even tell her: "well, you said you liked it" with a smile or even a wink. That will make her feel special.

I've dropped subtle hints to that effect. Earlier today she was talking about an ex who once wouldnt get off her while drunk and she had apparently talked to recently. She now hates this person. I can tell not only by the way she speaks of him but how she looks when she sees him the hall or whatnot. Anyway I said something like: "well, let what is in the past stay in the past". Its only been a few hours but she hasnt talked about an ex since. I am not worried about her leaving me for an ex b/c i know she loves me and mostly all of her ex's arent exactly on speaking terms. I am just a little insecure i guess.

Thank you Hannibal.

Me and my GF just recently starting officially going out (last Sun). We became best friends this year and we love each other soooo much. We had our HS Spring Break last week and we spent every day together and had so much fun. I love her and our relationship.

The issue is she talks about her ex's alot. She is always syaing "I hate to bring him up but....." Its always something bad so I guess thats good but I'm still kinda bothered by it. She was talking about sending him a Happy b-day letter which really worried me. Today she told me that instead of the letter she called him. She said that the phone call didnt go well but she is obviously thinking about him alot. And its not just him. She has talked about other ex's as well.

Should I be worried about this??? Should I talk to her about it??? How???

Thanks in advance for any help

Has there been a scientifc sudy on the percentage of unwanted pregnacies through unproctected sex with pulling out? I know to always use a condom, I was just interested if this study has been done?

Your friend does need help and you, being one of the few that may know about this needs to help her. First try going to someone and doing the whole "I have this friend....." thing. That way you keep her privacy and may find out a way to help. Tell her how much this hurts you and that you care for her. She needs to know that there are people that care for her out there and that her doing this really affects them. If this still continues than you have to let someone who can really help (doctor, psychiatrist, other programs specializing in helping teens) that she has this problem. She may not appreciate it now but if it does help her she will be grateful. And hurting your friendship this way is way better than losing her completely. And if something bad ever happened to her, you would feel eternally guilty b/c you didnt tell anyone. She needs help and you are the one to help her.

Out of those two, I'd say around the neck

I think you either have it or you dont but I think there are different types of love. Love for friends and family is different than that for your partner. And it is expressed different ways. I dont know if that means one is loved more or it is just a different type of love. I personally love my family and friends but I feel i love my partner more. She means a lot more to me than any of the others