bungalowone

it helps to read the replys...i know i feel like crap on the inside...but i definitely look better on the outside...at least that's what people tell me...even his friends say that...i work out tons, and even started my own business... like i said before i'm doing everything i possibly can to get over it...believe me i would take him back and still have hope... i guess i'll just try to convince myself that he can't replace three years in a couple of months...at least that's what i hope...i just wish i knew i meant something to him, that i didnt feel like it was a waste of time getting back together in the first place... still struggling with the idea of him with another date, but it helps to know other people know what im feeling....

it has been a month and ten days since the breakup and since i have talked to him. he broke up with me after three years...we have had some hard times (he broke up with me before, came back after a month)...i'm older, 24 and he's 22... all the pain is coming back and i cant sleep anymore because his formal is on friday and it's making me crazy to think about him going with someone else....i even have the dress still that he talked me in to buying...i cant think about anything else! i just keep picturing him with another girl...or does he have a new girlfriend now and that's why he hasnt tried to talk to me at all...i know there wasn't anyone when i left, but it's been over a month now... i try to do other things, paint, cycling, reading, i have 2 jobs...i dont know what else i can do...i have no peace of mind... we broke up because he said he feels differently...he doesnt think we should be together anymore...i cant take it...it's consuming me i have no idea what's going on with him...he hasnt tried to contact me at all...i deleted instant messenger, etc...but he could still email, call...i dont check away messages anymore.... how can he not contact me at all? did he ever care? why do i still have hope? my heart is hurting... i miss him so much i cant stand it...it feels like it's getting harder and that im just letting him go too easily... he's graduating in june and then i really will have no idea what he's doing....i keep thinking that he broke up with me because he was scared of what's to come...we were planning on looking for jobs accross the country and moving in together...up until that day we were still planning... it just kills me that he can let me walk away and not try to talk to me at all...nothing...what does that mean? i dont want to be friends...but what does it mean that he doesnt even try to contact me for that.... sorry...rambling, but that's about all i can do now...

i havent talked to my ex since he said we shouldnt be together and that he feels differently...and i told him i hated him and i walked out. i havent said a single word to him, no phone, no email, no online stuff...and he hasnt even tried to get in contact with me.... im also struggling with what that means, since we didnt even have a time period of me begging or pleading, or him even saying i want to be friends and have you in my life... i just feel forgotten and left behind...it's been a month for me too...i'm also struggling with how to deal with it.... i have my moments where i think i'll be ok, but then reality sets in and i start thinking too much.... how can he not even call and see if i'm ok?? we've broken up before and he came back after a month...but we never went this long without talking... i bought a dress for his formal...im 24, but he's just graduating...he talked me in to the dress and now he'll have to take someone else...so now, i feel like i'm back to square one... like you, i just dont understand how after 3 years, he can just walk away and that's it....i just feel like im waiting for something to happen...

ok, ive been posting a lot because im trying to work through this breakup and i still don't know what to do... we were together almost three years...he has now broken up with me for a third time...other times he came back, first time just a weekend, second time a month.... with the second breakup i would talk to him online and just kept getting hurt because he would just say the same things to me...he was too young, just didnt want to deal with a relationship anymore...so i stopped talking to him after a few weeks and then he randomly called and wanted to get back together he's 22 and im 24...the last break up was a year and a half ago...now this time he shocks me beyond belief because we were planning on moving together in august, he would be graduated and my lease would be up....this time he says he just doesnt feel the same anymore, doesnt think we should be together anymore...can imagine his future without me...but he was doing all this planning and everything was fine up until the moment he said we needed to talk...the breakup was just me asking questions...he just sat there...he was the one that always talked about the future... it will be two weeks tomorrow...i havent contacted him and he hasnt contacted me...it's been killing me...is he not contacting because he doesnt care...do i try to talk to him more or will it just make me feel worse and make him have confidence in his decision... i want him back with all my heart. i guess im hoping he's scared...i just dont know how to deal with being the most important person in someone's life and talking constantly to nothing at all...

i mean i guess he gave an explanation, but one im having trouble accepting...just because of how he acted and what he said up until the very moment he broke up with me... i just dont know how you can decide to wake up one day and break it off... im just so confused and not sure if a letter will be what i need to do...or if it would just push him away more...dont get me wrong, i do want him back...but that wouldnt be what the letter was...

im considering writing a letter to my ex...we've had no contact for a little less than 2 weeks...since it happened...what was the tone of the letter...im just contemplating and dont really know what to do...we were together for three years...he's the one that broke it off...

are u glad you wrote the letter and sent it? did he reply?

i have been struggling with how to deal with my breakup. we broke up on april 21st and i havent talked to him since i walked out...he broke up with me out of the blue. he hasnt tried to email or call...i've deleted instant messenger and msn, so that's not an option. i have so much anxiety over this, i dont know what to do...i can barely make it through my days without being completely overcome by hopelessness or sadness or everything... does he not care about me enough after three years to try and talk to me...we were planning our future together and he will be graduating college soon and we were going to move somewhere together... this whole thing is a shock to me...his reasons...he doesnt think he feels the same anymore...doesnt think we should be together...really he didnt say a whole lot....he just mainly reacted to questions i asked... everybody says no contact, but what if im just letting it slip away...what if he's just confused about the future and everything with graduation coming up...i'm telling you, he did and said everything right and wonderful up until the very moment we broke up... should i write a letter to get all my feelings out and let him know what the relationship meant to me...i feel like our relationship is so much more than how it ended...it wasnt even a long conversation...i just got too upset and left...he knows im upset...since i can be extra sensitive about things... and does it mean he doesn't care since he hasnt tried to contact me...even though im not sure i would answer i just am conflicted...do i just keep doing no contact or will sending him a letter get it off my chest...i guess i would hope for a reply, but im also not even sure he would read it, so as not to be "influenced" by anything i would say....just so he could deal with it... i just dont know what to do...i feel everything slipping away...everything in the relationship was so special...and now no contact at all....i just dont know what direction to go in. the letter really wouldnt be angry, im not sure what it would be... we've broken up before, and he came back after a month...but that was almost a year and a half ago...how do i get over this? i'll stop before i ramble more...

im so consumed by the hurt it's been 9 days and i feel like im getting worse. i havent talked to him since it happened. i just keep replaying it over and over in my head...should i have said more...asked more? what am i supposed to do now... he just said i dont think we should be together anymore, it just doesnt feel the same...like its been going downhill for awhile...but im telling you...he never acted that way....he was still planning for a future with me...it was going to be me and him moving away to start a future together... i asked if he was scared about that and that's why he's doing this...he said no... the worst part is i asked if he could imagine his life without me and he shook his head yes... can this really happen...can someone just one day decide they dont feel the same anymore after three years... i feel like i've given him my whole heart and i dont know how to get it back... now i dont even talk to him. im afraid if i call he'll just say the same thing again...i just am having a hard time accepting he fell out of love with me...i feel like im trapped and i dont know what to do...is no contact really what im supposed to do? i just dont know how to go from planning our lives together to me just figuring out what will get me through the next few hours... im incredibly sad...i knew he was the one for me after our first date....can it be meant to be if we've broken up three times....he did the breaking up and then came back....i just can't let go of this and accept that he doesnt feel the same about me anymore...

im so consumed by the hurt it's been 9 days and i feel like im getting worse. i havent talked to him since it happened. i just keep replaying it over and over in my head...should i have said more...asked more? what am i supposed to do now... he just said i dont think we should be together anymore, it just doesnt feel the same...like its been going downhill for awhile...but im telling you...he never acted that way....he was still planning for a future with me...it was going to be me and him moving away to start a future together... i asked if he was scared about that and that's why he's doing this...he said no... the worst part is i asked if he could imagine his life without me and he shook his head yes... can this really happen...can someone just one day decide they dont feel the same anymore after three years... i feel like i've given him my whole heart and i dont know how to get it back... now i dont even talk to him. im afraid if i call he'll just say the same thing again...i just am having a hard time accepting he fell out of love with me...i feel like im trapped and i dont know what to do...is no contact really what im supposed to do? i just dont know how to go from planning our lives together to me just figuring out what will get me through the next few hours... im incredibly sad...i knew he was the one for me after our first date....can it be meant to be if we've broken up three times....he did the breaking up and then came back....i just can't let go of this and accept that he doesnt feel the same about me anymore...

i just think about it every second...how he was with me...i keep replaying it over and over in my head...im not at peace with anything. i dont feel like it ended, but i cant talk to him. its been 8 days and he hasnt called, emailed...i feel like im going crazy. i feel completely alone...all my friends are moving away or are already away...far away...my roommate moved out to live with her boyfriend and now i have to find a new place to live...alone... this has completely thrown my life into a spiral...i just dont know how i can overcome this... does anyone ever get back together and it works out? how long will i feel like it's a struggle just to breathe...i can't bare the thought of not talking to him...and i just feel like im waiting...waiting for something to happen. i just keep imagining him with someone else...it's killing me. i'm not saying there is someone else...but if he doesnt think we should be together then he will have someone else.... i keep checking his away messages for something...i cant stop...i dont want to do it...what if one day i check it and he has someone else... i have no control over this and it's killing me. everything was just so right...now i have to figure out where to go now....

i gave him the key maybe a week before he broke up with me. i guess im hoping he's just scared and will realize what he's missing out on and the future he's missing out on. im not strong enough to confront him...i've completely taken him out of my life because i dont know what else to do...i feel like im just waiting...waiting for him to come back... i just dont know how he can be so open about talking about the future and marrying and everything...i never started these conversations, because i'm not ready for that either...i was just happy being with him...and now i dont have that... i just hope he's scared...and now i'm scared too...that he won't come back this time.

I wish someone could tell me what to do and what's going to happen. i cant think about anything else....i havent talked to him in 7 days...since he broke up with me saying he feels differently and doesn't think we should be together anymore. we were together almost three years and have been together since the very first moment we saw each other...he said it was love at first sight... he's going to be graduating college in a couple of months and i've been out for a couple of months...we were planning to move together when he was graduated...we had everything planned and he was doing a lot of the planning... i had no warning signs...he just drops this on me...everything was fine...perfect... we had broken up a couple of times before...once for a weekend and the last time for a month but that was almost a year and a half ago...both times he felt he was too young to be so serious with someone, etc. why is he doing this? i can't accept he doesnt love me anymore...nothing he was doing suggested this up until the very moment he broke up with me... i can't bare it...i hurt so much...i cant believe that im not supposed to be with him...i just can't accept it...he didnt even say much during the breakup...i told him i hated him and grabbed all my stuff and walked out... please tell me he's coming back...i can't go on knowing he wont be back.... his frat formal is coming up and he even helped me pick out the dress and told me to take the day off work...and now i have to think about him taking someone else on that day...he says he doesnt have anyone else, but he'll at least have a date on that day...and it breaks my heart... i even gave him a key to my place...and he was ok, he was like, this is a big step for us.... please just tell me he's scared and he'll come back...7 days of not talking to him are killing me...

all he said about the other times was that he thought he was too young to be with someone so seriously....he promised this last time that he wanted me and our future together...he wrote me this long letter in january for my birthday going on and on about our future together...not even a couple of days before this happened this time, he said that at least when he graduates he has more going for him than other people because we have each other. i'm just at a loss...he just seems to do this at really bad times (not that there is a good time)...first time was right after i graduated...second time was right before he started his senior year...and now he does it before he graduates....does someone come back after three times...can he really be that confused with what he wants?

It's kind of a long story, but i just don't know what to do...I thought maybe writing it all out might help...maybe some advice too, but nothing anybody says seems to help. I had been dating a guy for almost three years (I'm 24 and he's 22)...I'm not saying everything was perfect...he had broken up with me twice before, but came crawling back...the first time it was only a weekend, and the second time it was after a month. both times, i didn't talk to him at all after we broke up, it was just too painful, but we got together and were able to work through it. The last break up was probably over a year and a half ago. But since then, he had written letters, etc. and we had both moved on from all of that and were stronger together. Everything was fine...I mean everything...still spent time together a lot, still did everything, nothing was lacking...i know when somthing is wrong between us and there just wasn't anything wrong... I stopped by to see him after work and he acted kind of funny and isn't talking and finally says we need to talk about us...I was in shock. He says we shouldnt be together anymore and that he feels differently. What does that mean? He says he's been feeling this way for a couple of days. In a couple of days he can realize that he doesnt want to be with someone after three years...a couple of days....isnt this something that slowly happens...he says there is no one else... I dont know what to think. we were going to be moving in a few months to california or somewhere else after he graduated college and we found jobs...my lease is up in august, so that was our deadline...i guess i'm hoping he's just worried about graduating and the next part of his life...how can i just believe he feels differently... he didn't even talk during the whole break up thing...i did all the talking...he had other opportunities to do this...i gave him a key to my apartment...i was showing him a dress that I was buying for his last formal for his frat and i told him i was taking a personal day for upcoming plans we had together. this was all less than a week before he dropped the bomb on me. why didn't he say anything when i was doing all of this...he was fine. and now i have this dress as a reminder of that day... i told him i hated him and i just walked out...is that how our three years is going to end. is that it? i'm never going to contact him. i'm afraid he won't come back this time...how do i deal with this...we were planning on marrying in a couple of years...we had baby names, we had every thing planned out...and now nothing...and i wasn't the one talking about all these things...he would bring up the future more than me and i would talk about it then...he was so into me...not even a week ago he wrote me a lovey-dovey email...i'm serious when i say it happened all of a sudden. he's the one im supposed to be with...why don't i get what i want...how can he just leave it all... it happened 3 days ago. where do i go with my life now?