tiger04

thanks rock_chick! it made me feel better. yes i jsut got off the phone wtih him and he reassured me. i guess him thinking talking like that about other girls kinda made me feel insecure, especialyl thinking im not so attractive. but i talked to him and he reassured me and i feel so much better. and i asked him not to talk liek that around me, sober or drunk. and he says he didnt even remember it til i brought it up..so obvoiusly it didtn mean anything to him. i feel so stupid now for caring about something liek that. and yes there has never been anything suspicious..him being secretive or anything so i think i should just leave it be. thank you to everyone cos you guys really did make me feel better

ya definetly. this all made me feel better. i know he only has eyes for me, and i know that hed never do it, i guess the paranoia is getting to me. i will for sure let him know how im feeling but i guess ill do it in a non nagging way. it was only one time that this happened, and i mean i talk about other guys in front of my girlfriends of course. i know its okay for him to do it when im not around, or at least to think it, it still bothers me though. i guess im just like jealous or something. its already going away. thanks guys

yaa for sure. other than this we have pretty much no problems. this isnt even a problem. i think other guys are hot, and im sure he thinks other girls are hot, obvoiusly, thats how humans are made..i just dont like it. it just hurts me to think of him thinking another woman is attractive. and yes hes very respectful to me and this is the only time this has happened. i guess just hearing him talk liek that about someoen else other than me makes me not feel too good. perhaps its because we are each others first evreything (wed only kissed other people before each other) hes even my first bf and im his first gf..i dont know. thanks for the advice you guys.. one question: now im worried that when im not there and hes drinking wtih his friends hes gonna talk about it, and perhaps do worse..as in maybe act upon it. i am almost positive im just being paranoid..but ive never really heard him talk like that before. im going camping on wednesday until sunday and im just worried that hell be doing anything inappropriate

i was out with my boyfriend last night and some friends to celebrate canada day. we got really drunk and it was a ton of fun. something kinda bothered me; when he was drunk he was talking to this guy he knew and wa slike "your moms a milf shes fine" and all this. hes never talked about a woman like that when he is sober. and i guess i do realize obviously hes going to think other women are attractive, but i cant help but get jealous. then when i asked him about it this morning when he was sober he said he odenst think sehs attractive blah blah and i kept bothering hima bout it. i guess i just felt hurt..i know this is sooo lame. and it wasnt only this girl. he never says anything like "oh i want to do her" or anything liek that, just when hes drunk and around his friends theyll talk bout how attractive soem girl is, and he tries to hide it from me. is aynone thnk my feelings are normal, or am i totaly out of whack?

thanks guys! i appreciate it. ill try those things and ill let you know how it goes

ive posted a thread here a few weeks ago where i stated that i wnated my bf of 2 years to do more romantic things. and i got the suggestions to do some things romantic for him to set an example. i set up a picnic in a park, we had ar eally fun night with champagne at a hotel and ive given him tons of massages and ive just tried to be as romantic as i can be. we even went on a 3 day trip to a bed and breakfast a few hours away. this was all my idea. he was into it and everything but i kinda wish hed start doing some things. he used to always buy me flowers and do special things to surprise me. that was months ago. i know i cant MAKE him do anything but sometimes i just want to be relaly surprised. like even something simple. it doesnt have to be a weekend getaway, it could be him making me a thoughtful card and giving me flowers. or makign dinner for the two of us. we are really happy together and have a great time hanging out i just wish sometimes that hed do something to make me feel special cos lately i havent felt that way.

okay, thanks. i think it is too. i think if it happens again soon i will ask him casually but i tihnk i shall leave it alone now. thanks all and goondight

not really. it went away. i felt it a couple of hours ago for about 30 minutes then it went away. he could very well be cheating, i have no idea WHEN he would though, as he works 50 hour weeks and he still lives at home so when i call and hes not home his parents tlel me where he is. and he doesnt know that many females, all the females he knows also know me adn most of them are taken. there is nothign he has done to make me believe he has cheated. i guess it was just a thought that popped into my head. i was watching maury, one of the episodes where it invovled infidelity, and then i was like "what if my bf is cheating on me?" the feelings kind of gone away. i think if it comes up again i should ask him, but subconsciously i do believe that he isnt cheating. i think its just me being all paranoid.

do you think i should ask him about it? he got off work at 11 (im on pacific time here) and its 11:30 and he shoudl be calling me within the next 20 minutes or so. do you think i should casually bring it up?

yes, i dont feel hes romantic anymore. he still tells me im beautiful and he recently bought me a nice watch, i juts feel like i have to fish for compliments. but i am a lucky girl as he is a great guy. i have no reason to believe this. i was actually watching a tv show and a couple was going thru infedility problems and it kinda popped into my head.."what if my bf has had sex with someoen else before". theres no reason at all for me to think it, i guess it just got in my head and now ive been thinking about it ever since. i worry quite a bit and have been known to be extremely paranoid and sensitive. im not even going to ask him about it, as i have no reason to believe it be true. it was pretty much a "what if?" that went a little too far. just like after the first time i had sex i was positive i was pregnant even though iw as using birth control and a condom. and there was no reason for me to believe that i was. i jsut started freaking out. melrich-why do you think its very likely hes cheating? thakns.

me and my guy have been dating for 2 years, and in fact we lost our virginities to each other about a year and a half ago. we love each other very much and are pretty happy. we hardly get in fights. for some weird reason, i have the suspicion he had sex with someone else. theres absolutely NO reason for me to believe this. girls arent exaclty lined up at his door waiting for him. he is attractive though. i have no idea, but this idea just popped into my head. and im almost positive im just being paranoid. does anyone else think im acting crazy and im wayy to paranoid? after all, hes done absolutely nothign to make me believe he had sex with someone else.

yeah those are great ideas. champagne sounds nice. and i just turned 19 woohoo. (i live in canada so now im legal drinking age, and hes 20). maybe ill surprise him. now that i think about it when hed do all those nice things for me, i would say relaly sweet things, but never really showed him(By doing things like this). i just want him to be happy most of all. be happy with me and have me show it. on our 1 year anniversary (weve been dating for 1 year and 10 months) and on our 1 year he gave me a diamond ring and told me he never knew how much i meant to him and it hit him that day, and all that. i just dont know if hes still feeling that way, maybe he is, hes just not showing it. ill do somethign nice and see how it goes. thanks

i know what you mean and i udnerstand. iw ont bite your head off and no one else will either im sure well, i recently bought him a movie, made dinner and baked cookies and it was kind of like a picnic, only indoors. he said he really liked it. that was 2 weeks ago. he hasnt done anything really romantic or anthing liek that. perhaps i am expecting too much, and i do know that i did take it for granted when hed do those sweet things before. i guess the real question is: is there anything i could do to make him more "romantic"

okay guys and i thank you now for helping me out. anyhow, im 19 years old, and ive been dating my boyfriend for about 2 years. things have been going well, we fight occasionally, and get along great usually. he always used to bring me flowers for no reason (not always, but like once a month or even more and it was soo sweet). we had a little rough patch about 2 months ago and it lasted for about 3 weeks (us constalntly fighting, unsure of if we want to continue to go out) but a few weeks ago we got over it and things have been pretty good since and we resolved our problems. the thing is, how do i get him back to doing sweet things like bringing me flowers for no special reason, or giving me compliments. he does give me compliments now, but only if i kind of hint at it. before he always would. and dont get me wrong, hes still a great guy and doesnt neglect me or anything, i just would like to know if anyone could help me find a way to get him to be more... (im not sure of a right word, i want to say happy, but thast not exaclty it) i just want him to be more enthused and kind of get him back into that feel again. anyhting i could do to help him start doing all thsoe wonderful things again besides talking to him about it?