Damselle

Well I asked him about the pictures and he told me they are for his best friend who doesn`t have internet. Sounds fishy to me. Any more input woukld be âprciated

I completely disagree. Her behaviour is not depression. Depression is a mental state of excessive sadness characterized by persistently low mood, loss of pleasure and interest. That's the dictionary's description not mine. And I can tell (from what you've posted) she hasn't lost interest in you, she isn't ALWAYS in a low mood and at a loss of pleasuer 24/7. It's simply called "over-attachement" it's a phaze that passes. You say it yourself "her insecurity just get's in the way SOMETIMES". I've noticed that a couple of people judge a little too hard and say some really ridiculous things on here. Just because someone goes through a rough period are falls in love for the first time and becomes a little too attached doesn't mean they are going through severe depression. Geez Kskm sure am glad I am not dating you. Wow nice to see you would work things out with your significant other before institutionalizing them. A simple word of advice to you not everything in life follows a list from the net.

hey Tim, In a way, I would have to say that this was most probably best for the both of you because as you mentioned. . . you can now look from a best friends point of view. (as hard as that is however) Nonetheless, as for what goes on geting your girl back, no one will really be able to give you the best advice but yourself. As for me I know I am a sucker for flowers and they are generally very appreciated by most girls. I know I once broke up with a boyfriend and he showed up with a poetic story of how much he missed me and why. Yes this sounds more than extremely gay to almost EVERY guy I know, but it completely won me over. This girl knows you better than most for the exception of maybe you family and best bud. Ponit being?! she'll know if the gestures you are doing are genuine but most importantly come from you. Tim, in two years I'm sure there are many things you've don that have made her smile. It doesn't have to be complicated, your just showing her that you gave her that WAY WRONG impression, you regret it and want to be with her. Once you prove this to her, there's no way she'll be able to resist. When your ready to move in a with a person it takes much longer than that for your feelings to die. Hope to see you guys back together soon. Val

Hi Tim, I am not sure if this is what happened but you make it sound in your post that you were too busy with something else and couldn't find the time to explain yourself to her as to why you said no. That would have made her feel like she wasn't the priority here(and who are we kidding she definitely should be, especially after a question like that is proposed.) I will tell you something, as women we like to feel important and needed just like you men do and if she is ready to take the next step and you did not seem to agree than that was of course a huge blow for her and needless to say it hurt her alot. Don't wonder why she broke things off. You not only said no but didn't even take the time to say why you feel you are not ready. That can make any girl feel rejected and unimportant to you. I know this is not at all what you think(it is quite the contrary Iwould say) but it seems you gave her this idea unintentionally. Fortunately for you she is definitely still head over heels because the flirting wouldn't be there if she wasn't. My best advice to you is do not leave her alone to make up her own mind. In her mind she already got a rejection so if she is like me (independent) she won't keep running back for more. It is now your move. Remember it is never too late for an explaination and I think in this case it would even be greatly appreciated because whatever the reason was you can say it now and she will listen. And why would you want to make her miss you? Don't you love this girl? Why would you want her grieving, missing, crying over you her ex bf? Aren't you the guy who is suppose to make her happy? Chances are she is but she willnot show this to you. You've been dating this girl for 2 yrs, you know what she likes. Show up with zillions of flowers at her door, or send her flowers at work, lots of them, Or do something that was meaningful in your relationship. This girl loves you! GO GET HER! -Damselle

Your girlfriend loves you very very much. I can tell you this because I am a girl who used to act the exact same way and I realised that it was sometimes irratating for my boyfriend but I couldn't stop as much as I wanted to. ~If you r willing to invest a little time for her to feel great Trust me it will stop~ First I will try to make u understand why we act like that: In my head(when I used to act very insecure too like ur girlfriend) I was (still am) completely head over heals for my bf. Chances are you are the first guy she has truly fallen in love for which is amazing. But she most probably has been hurt b4 and her insecurity is just a subconscious fear of losing what means the world to her. Every girl has a different way of dealing with things. And this is probably hers as was mine. second I will tell you what we did that helped ME stop and now we are more happy than EVER!!! my boyfriend helped me bring rlationship security to my eyes and I could never have been able to if it wasn't for him. Tell her what you feel when she tells you that she is afraid of losing you. When my boyfriend told me that it hurt him when I said things like that I realised that I had nothing to worry about and I wanted to stop. He told me that loved me and all he wanted to do was make me happy. Insecurity builds up and it takes time to break but very easily done. this is what we did, we decided that, Instead of me asking "Baby, you're not going to break up with me." I would say "baby tell me you love being with me" Instead of me saying "Babe, you sure you love me and want to be with me?" I would say"Baby tell me you love me" and most of the time I'd be hugging him and it was much more pleasurable. Sometimes I would slip because it had become a habit but he would help me back up and say "baby rephrase that question, you know I love you" it sounds weird but trust me it works. By turning her questions more positive it is less annoying for you and since the questions are said positively she had to think POSITIVE to say them and of course she gets the answer she knows but loves to hear and it is what you like to say ne ways. Yes it will take some time but nothing works like a miracle and trust me this is a good start hope this helps, -Val

I am 18 yrs old dating a soon to be 26 yr old. I thought that his being older would help me have a more serious relationship but now I am not so sure. I was at his house a few days ago while he was taking a shower. That's when I noticed he had forgotten his e-mail and messenger open for all to see. Well, what i found there wasn't pretty. . . . 1. a file linking to Many dirty Pornography pictures whom where almost all from the same Pornstar! 2. E-mails from pornstars containing more dirty pictures. 3. and last but definitely not least, he added a handful of girls on his messenger. Nomally I really would not care about this last one but they are all MY age 18 , 19. Where is he getting all these girls e-mails? I am still a student, in college, to be exact and my bf hates it if I add a guy from my classes on messenger. So to make him happy I didn't. but why then is he adding girls of all kinds when he doesn't me want me to do the same?! Wouldn't this be an example of an unfair "I do but u can't" relationship. and as for the porn we've done everything he's looking at sometime or other so why does he have these. He could just look at the tapes we have of each other.. . . . Now I feel like I don't give him what he needs and yet that couldn't be further from the truth. I get more confused because he tells me he loves me and has talked about maybe getting married with me someday but then why all this stuff. . . I might be 18 but he is after all my first boyfriend and I don't know if I am over reacting or if this really is not normal.