Nauseated

thanks for your adivce all. I do really love her, and I kow she really loves me as well, thats why I'm ok with us having this extra space. I'm hurt, but not because I feel like I lost her, but just hurt cause I know she isnt in my arms right now . Why not try it all, if your only going to remember it once. if we really were as perfect for each other as we said, it'll all work out somehow. In the mean time I guess i'm gonna have to get used to her not playing a role in my life. "All things excellent are as difficult as they are rare."

I know that a break is often a sig of an unhealthy relationship, but the fact of the matter is that the conversation we had didnt result in both of us expressing what was wrong etc, and that bad stuff usually comes up when trying to break it off with someone.

Well, Hoping, whats your situation like? maybe it'll do us both some good If we talk about it.

Well, she said that she does not want to date other people, but just needs some time to do a little soul-searching and rediscover herself. Thats why i'm all for it. Its very important to understand who you are, especially when you've been in a relationship for so long. Our age (i'm 21 she's 20) probably has alot to do with it as well, she probably wants to experience life without a LTR in the way. I feel the same way, but I couldnt be strong enough to do it because I care for her so much. Am I understanding it correctly?

Well, long story short, I mutually split up with my girlfriend of 3 years yesterday. I'm a little hurt that it had to end, but I can understand why it had to be that way. Feelings aside, I just really need to understand what she meant when she said "I love you, but I really need some time to be single, and find out who I am as a person." I'm going to be doing the whole NC tactic, but I just really want to know why a woman (who was very into me) just reflects and comes to the decision that she needs some time to be single. I know she is not / did not cheat on me or anything like that. Is she confused? Was it me? what sense can I make of that statement? Sincerely Nauseated

Thanks for everyones assistance. Gues i'm just gonna keep doing what I'm doing and come what may...

3 years. I think she's trying to rebound... or so her friends say.

The thing i really dont understand is why she would call me and say all that stuff, then one hour later take it back as if she never said anything. edit, horrid spelling.

Well now, where should I begin? I'll try to make this as short and sweet as possible... I recently broke up (mutually, I suppose) with my (ex)girlfriend last week. It seemed as though the break up was undeniable, and going to happen sooner or later. We both came to this conclusion over the phone. Since then I have implemented the infamous NC method of coping. As the weekend grew nearer I decided to take a trip and visit some old friends and family for the weekend. Long story short when I got home I found a message from my ex. On the message she seemed as though she'd been crying for a while, so I sucked it up and decided to call her. She explained her situation to me, citing that some of her friends dislike her now etc... and by the end of the conversation, she was saying "I Love You," "i miss you," "when can I see you," etc... Meanwhile I took a step back and began reflecting on the situation. 1) I am still in Love with her as well... obviosuly 2) I know that things never are the same when you get back together with someone. 3) It really felt like we were experiencing the old emotions that we once had. So I did what any guy would do (i think,) I told her that we should take some time to think about what we want, and if it would be beneficial to try and fix the relationship. We let each other go with her saying "I love you," one last time, and I began my reflection. One hour passes and I get a phone call from her. She says that she dosnt want to get into a relationship with me "its broken," etc... and that she dosnt want to be friends with me ( when we first broke up I told her I didnt want to be friends with her, and she didnt understand why). So now I've seen two sides of a fence and really dont know what to make of all of this. I've been adhering to NC since that conversation, but mostly because I really dont know whats going on... can someone make sense of this for me? thanks, -Nauseated

Well, as you probably already know from the subject I am in dire need of help... I'll try to limit the size of my post so I dont bore anyone with my insignificant problem... Well, where to begin... Its been 3 days since I broke up with my girlfriend of 2 years (it would have been 2 years this monday...) and I need advice on what to do. The relationship started out like they always do... Perfect in every sense of the word. We spent every possible moment together and it seemed as though nothing would ever break us apart. The first year and a half was full of this type of bliss. I was never happier in my life. But after that inital year and a half, what made the relationship unreal began to fade away. It was still great but not spectacular. We began to fight... alot, and would frequently "break up" over these stupid, meaningless fights. Our breakups would never last more than a day. Communication began to be an asset which we did not possess after a while. Long story short, up until tuesday (the day it happened) I had never felt better about how the relationship was going, and I was happy. Little did I know, she was seemingly unhappy, and wrote me an e-mail saying she "does not love me anymore" and that its over. what a shock! Not knowing what to do (it was my first serious relationship) I went to her house and we began to talk. She admitted to me that she still loves me, but does not want to be in a relationship because it wouldnt work out between her and I. I was devistated in every sense of the word. I could not, and still cannot, grasp the concept that she is not there for me anymore. I think I made a mistake by liking her too much. I know she did, at one point, love me as much, or even more than I do, but now I dont know what to think. What should I do? how do I get over her now? Is it truly over between us? is there something she is not telling me? I dont know what to do! I dont even feel like myself anymore. Please help! (ask any additional questions if i have mistakenly omitted any vital information... I cant type everyone out in full because it would take up too much room). please help. I feel empty