savannahohsavannah

Some guys are so good at spinning the truth they make you believe that you caused them to do things to you. Don't buy into that one in the least. Don't go near this fella, and if he tries to come near you get a restraining order. As a matter of fact, I'd get an order now.

Ok my gf and I have seen each other quite a bit, but i have a problem. When we make out and kiss and stuff (shes an absolutely incredible kisser), I feel like my brain is completely shut off, like I cant create thought. I can try to think but i just cant. I feel so excited, like instinct is kinda taking over. Then afterwards when we say goodbye my train of thought comes back and I feel terrible because I want to do it so badly again because I feel like I didnt savour the moment. Does anybody else have this problem?

I think it's obvious that you are young, and I guess health classes do not address this issue. I can say this technically or tactfully, and I don't know what the mods will do, but let me do it technically, so there are no misperceptions. During the phase of sexual arousal where the males penis is engorged with blood, this causes blood and thereforeeee, oxygen deprivation in the brain. Without oxygen, you don't think as well. It's not *exactly* hypoxia, but almost. Basically, everyone has some level of this problem, so don't worry unless you have something called "le petit mort" where you pass out during excitement.

Savannah

I just spurted my coffee out my nose...

Why laugh? LOL! I think she might be right. They're into the too rich and too thin mentality!

Lily04:

I can give you the benefit of my experiences! I have a college degree and write. I've worked as a waitress, because of the small town I live in and also because it let's me keep my creative side flowing, by not tapping into it during work. I am okay with that.

Enter Mr. Wonderful TV personality. He was on a hiatus from a news position when I met him online. Several phone calls followed, and I could see that he wasn't interested, even though he was nice to my face (on the phone). The upshot here: I think tons of famous men don't date waitresses. And since I've worked as one so long, and I have just as much education, and am just as smart as most of these fellas, that turns ME off! I grew up in a college town and most educated people have tons of hubris. I think that's just sad! I have a degree from a southern Ivy League (if there truly is such a thing) school. I am smart, about people and business. No, I'm not going to fly a plane, I'm not an engineer. I don't like math. But it's not about what I am as a person to a man who is looking for arm candy: it's about narcissitic supply. You can look that term up on Google if you need to, but basically it means you need to reflect well on him. For some guys that means you need to be a goddess. I don't know about you, but if I were a goddess, I'd be on the silver screen!

I think you should just date whomever you want to, and then think about the other externals like money and power and fame as things you should earn for yourself, not from a man.

Savannah

Tell her to cut out her verbal abuse or you'll kick her to the curb.

I think it takes time to know what a relationship is! During the courtship phase, if he just totally blows you off for a significant time period, you can guess pretty easily that he was simply playing you. *Hook Ups* are frequent in our society, and I agree, it's hard to know. Not giving it up too easily is a great way to get the playboys out of your life fast, I've found. It frees you up for the real men.

Savannah

I've had strong feelings for those who do not return them and I can see that they never will. I think it's hard to work through, but do it. Find all the dudes flaws and then think of how AWFUL he is for a while. It typically works for me!

Savannah

OMG, thank you for your story! It's so heartfelt!

What do you think I can do for my friend to make her feel better? This man is very good looking, and I believe he's telling *her* he is BOTH, despite only saying he's gay to friends. She had a crush on this guy when they were both younger and he was still straight.

Any ideas?

Nope, I think she's in love with him. If I didn't think it was serious, I would not have bothered with a post. Ummm...your post wasn't serious, was it?

Savannah

Some men fade out of your life like a summer tan, and this sounds an awful lot like what he's trying to do. I didn't really get the question, because you mentioned you were thinking about breaking it off and moving to a foreign country for more life experiences, and you were hoping he might tag along. It sounds like he's completely into INDECISION. He's not doing anything, except maybe testing the waters without you.

Do you want him to stay with you, or do you want him to go? I think that would be a great thing to decide before you do anything else.

I have a pal who is dating a man who is gay. I know he's gay, and so does she. I see she's falling in love with him, and I think it could be a bad deal for her. He used to tell people that he's bisexual, but in the last decade or so, they're not young, he's been calling himself GAY. What do you think about this situation?

I'm not about to say anything, but I don't know what it means to be gay versus being bi. I had one pal who was always torn about whom she wanted to be with, men or women, but she was the sum total of my experience in listening to someone talk about how they feel.

Could anyone help me out and tell me what they think about her situation?

Savannah

I think we get overly involved, too soon, with a man at whom we would not bat one eyelash! And that's not them, it's US. Neediness, maybe?

Can you for one minute, suspend all your pain at the breakup, and then look at this situation with foreign eyes, and see the HUMOR in a guy showing up to pick up things from an old gf's house with a huge hickey? Impossibly funny! I'd say he did it deliberately to get your goat, don't let him!

A good tease would have been my response.

I've had my share of bad breakups in life and the old saying that everyone has told you by now, but you don't want to hear again : "time heals all wounds" is actually true. I know it's not much when you look at it now, and since you are so young you might not have the past experience with breakups to help you through it. Just remember, it most likely was nothing you did or said that got you a breakup. It was just her, and you together. Chemistry is hard, and timing is even harder. I've loved guys too soon, or too late, and missed the mark.

Savannah

Mmmmm anyone heard the one about the pot and the black kettle?

I have never lied about my age to anyone!!!

Many years AFTER the fact, I just found out that one of my love interests was four years older than he claimed!!! Neither of us was old! Any ideas???

Savannah

Even though yours is relatively small you are suffering from the love triangle-itis that young people love to create...self-created drama. First, don't demand that young woman leave his parents house not for ANY reason. It makes you look like a ballbreaker, and even if he doesn't mind, you have to get to know and become friends with his parents. You are old enough to have thought of that one yourself, actually. Why didn't you? Are you so angry at her for not moving on that you just want to lash out a bit? Don't! Let the hotel money go for your room with him and make it a romantic holiday, even if you have to warn hotel security about her and that you don't want to be interrupted by anyone.

Good luck to you. I echo the too much drama sentiments from others. He's not ready for one woman. He's loving getting social strokes from you both. I'd move on.

Some things, when they get tangled never come undone and have to be cut loose.

No, I would not contact her. The best you would wind up with is an angry ex who will think you are trying to mess up his current love life. Move on, let your happiness with someone else eat away at his heart.

Y does he always sneak into your room? Are you getting physical during these visits? You are your parents ***** until you turn 18, so you may as well move on if they are dead set against you seeing this guy!

She gave you some grief, didn't she? Forget her, go on to someone else.

DEALBREAKER! It' s almost as if she's emotionally such a child herself. Trust me, if you had a child with her, she'd be jealous of it. DEALBREAKER!

Get Help Now!

Only 11 % of Americans believe in astrology: I don't. If you seek paybacks for those who havehurt you. You are just as likely to have more trouble as you are to get satisfaction! I say pick your battles. Don't tolerate defamation or theft, but if it's romantic trouble you speak of, ignore them and really get their goat.

Ok, so there is a guy you like who for some reason cannot come see you? And you believe it will look trashy if you pick up the phone, call and see if it's okay to visit? WHERE did you meet this guy? If he's an internet connection, chances are higher he's sexually promiscuous and using the web to find sex! thereforeeee your fears may be well-grounded. But don't you know the power of refraining from a casual fling? My take would be to call and see how he feels about a visit. If you get a lot of negatives don't go. His friend may be his gf, and maybe he's roo embarrassed to fess up. Play it cool,but don't grow icicles!