limichelle

I guess because I’m a little different when it comes to memorabilia. I see more why you’re hurt. After my decade long relationship I got rid of everything the next day. I didn’t see the point and it helped me move on. So I can see why this is awkward for you. The fact that he keeps all of the letters along with saying she’s the one that got away. It has me concerned he hasn’t fully moved on from her. I had a dear friend who discovered her boyfriend’s past love letters. She and I were house sitting his house and dog while he was on a trip. 
 

I remember telling her at the time. If it makes you uncomfortable, ask questions. If he doesn’t understand or gets upset. Then that’s on him. 
 

my advice for you is the same. You won’t know unless you ask. Theres the reality of the letters and then there’s the thoughts inside your head. 

I think it’s only fair you tell him. He deserves to know. Keeping this from him, then later on he finds out! Will make matters so much worse. Also it’s not fair for you to keep him when you never really wanted him. If you had wanted him you wouldn’t have strayed. Ask yourself why you strayed. 

Thank you everyone.

she’s now at peace

Today we’re taking her in to be put to sleep. She’s in a lot of pain and can’t walk. 

Unfortunately she’s at end stage  acute renal failure. Most likely we’ll be having her put to sleep. We’re trying ivy fluids to see if it will help somewhat. 

Hi,

We got Emma in 2009 at one year of age. She’s enlightened our lives so much! She’s given us so much unconditional love. She’s been by far the most favorite pet I’ve ever owned!

Shes stopped eating, drinking, and peeing.

we found out she’s in kidney failure. I just am asking for thoughts and prayers. 

Hi, next time don’t stay on the phone putting up with someone putting you down. Next time hang up on them and block. 
 

If a guy is interested he’ll make sure there’s that coffee date. No matter how long he has to wait. 

It would be a nope for me! I don’t care if I’m not official with the person yet, respect is a big deal along with communication. She sounds flighty at best but self centered. I get the feeling there’s more to this ‘Hawaii vacation.’ Like others suggested, she could be seeing someone else or didn’t really go to Hawaii. Any excuse to not be close by. 
 

I wouldn’t hold my breath waiting for her. I’m sorry op it sounds like you’re far more invested. 

Happy Mother’s Day to you Seraphim  and all the mothers! 

I’m sorry this is happening. 
 

I too was once in a cyber relationship. In fact he and I talked for a year. He lived far away in another State. Finally he came out to visit. I met him and saw not only was there no chemistry. It quickly popped the bubble of fantasy real fast! He was nothing like how he portrayed himself to be over text. He was aloof, cold and stuck up. Where as over text he was warm, funny, and humble. 
 

You can see how cyber is not good take on reality. 
 

I advise dating someone you can hang out physically with. 

I’m in a popular belief that if something is too difficult or makes you feel crummy. It’s best to get rid of it. There’s always good reason it’s not something you want to pursue. 
 

Maybe he has legit reasons or he’s just telling lies. I would focus on the bigger picture. He’s not making time for you. 
 

I feel you… I’m and have the same issues as being on disability, not driving and still living at home. I have schizoid affective though. But I feel you on wanting love but not feeling like a desirable candidate in the online dating world. 
 

I used to go on dating sites telling every guy about my issues so I can see if they accept me. I then with time and self realization I decided not to do that. I’ll have schizoid affective for life. THEY have to accept me or they can hit the road! I have to see if They’re worth it. To see if their worth my time and effort. That’s the new attitude I developed. 
 

Once you accept your shortcomings as being non negotiable like your Asperger’s. You’ll gain a better confidence that attracts people to you. 
 

I too try to not care and shut off my emotions for all the abuse I’ve endured. 
 

I then ask myself why succumb to others abuse in the first place. 
 

You deserve to be loved and happy. The negativity you’re projecting won’t attract healthy people. Misery loves company. 
 

Focus more on your good qualities and advertise those instead. 

Move on.

Two simple words that will have you avoid further heartaches and headaches. 
 

No good can come from staying because she told you she doesn’t want sex with you and is planning on sleeping with other guys. 
 

You’ll only get further stringed along and it’s best to take her for her word become you can’t change her feelings on the matter. 
 

You both sound very incompatible. She also sounds very insecure by wanting the validation and then using it as a point of contention. 
 

This isn’t love it’s a cat and mouse game. Where you’re being kept on the back burner 

Congrats J.man! I’m sorry your step father has put you in that difficult place, even though he’s without common sense and consideration. 

Not all woman want some muscular dude that can bench 1000 and walk and talk like a Neanderthal. 
 

Theres plenty of woman who want a nice guy that is nice and treats them with respect. For me it’s about respect. 
 

It would be like me assuming all guys wanted is a blonde, model who knows few words of the vocabulary that loves cheer! 
 

If you change your thinking and point of view you’ll feel differently and better.

I had that happen to me once. Just ignore him, he’s playing juvenile mind games. I would block him so he can’t keep ‘reappearing’. 

I’m so sorry! I’m sending positive thoughts and warm virtual hugs your way.

I’m sorry things are tough. One day at a time is all you can take it. I know, because after I was raped I literally could only take it one hour at a time. My therapist, I asked if she could admit me to the hospital because I wanted to die. She said she could but no amount of medication or therapy can change what happened. You have to find a way to accept it was crappy and heal from it and therapy can help you accept it in small doses.

I promise it gets better. It gets easier to deal with life. I became very agoraphobic afterwards. So it took awhile before I could even walk out the front door to check the mail. 

If anyone understands the sheer agony and pain of this, I do! Believe me! 
 

Lean on those who are your support system, give yourself acknowledgment you went through something horrible. Give yourself Grace.
 

I’m so sorry. My heart goes out to you. I know exactly how you feel with self blame. I too was raped this past summer and there’s moments still eight months later even after intense therapy I still blame myself. 
 

May I suggest trauma therapy? I promise it works and it helps a ton! It won’t take the pain completely away but it will help you manage it so you don’t keep harming yourself.

I don’t know I used to be that way. Honestly I don’t care about looks all that much. At the end of the day I just want someone who can make me laugh and I can be comfortable and myself with. 

I feel a lot of people swipe right and so they may not even be a true match.  I would just unmatch them and move on. 

Doesn’t sound healthy to be honest. He’s being emotionally abusive. You don’t need to cater to his whim. He’s trying to keep you on a tight leash. I would cut the ties and be free of him. 
 

Honestly why put up with someone nagging you for your time 24/7? He’s being disrespectful of your schooling and you. There’s no love in his controlling behavior. 

I agree with Bolt!

Everything seemed rather rushed before really knowing anything about each other. It seems now you’re unable to communicate with him. Maybe you two are just incompatible.

The problem is the honeymoon phase never really lets you see the other person at their worst or if they have issues. It’s like having rose tinted glasses on. 
 

Now you see him drifting because he has those rose tinted frames off himself. 
 

It’s normal progress of things once the glasses come off. It’s how a relationship evolves into something more or just isn’t meant to carry on.

Him feeling ‘trapped.’ Is in a way his getting out of the relationship. He’s blaming his everyday stresses on the relationship essentially making it the scapegoat. 
 

it’s not your fault and you should never take the blame. 
 

If you can tell him what you want to  fix in the relationship and 

if he doesn’t budge then it’s best to move on from him. 
 

He’s doing a gradual fade though from the sounds of it by saying he’s feeling trapped.