kain2k

you know what i agree with that in many ways. Love is love, its not some game. And even if you do look stupid or weak, If you get her back then thats all that matters. If you love someone, you should be weak for them, you should be vunerable to them, because you are. I personally dont even really agree with the no contact rule to begin with. Absense doesnt make the heart grow fonder, it makes the heart grow colder. Follow your heart, if you feel in your heart of hearts that calling her is the way to go. Call. If not dont. Its as simple as that.

Amen wandering. Just cuddle up and enjoy the peace of togetherness. The tranquility and saftey of being with that one true love.

One more thought, maybe the reason I havent let go of her. Your right, this girl has serious issues, she's sick. And thats the thing, I still feel there is something to "for better or worse, sickness and in health". I guess I want to her to look back and say "how hes been there all the long" ya know? The one guy who never turned his back on her, despite all she does. I really love her, unconditionally. I've never been so in love with someone. Ya know. So what can I do, in this situtation to bring her back without turning my back on her? Please any help would be appericated,

I'm 25 years old, its been a rough 25 too. Ironicly, she just called and we talked about things. She wants to sign off on the kids and move down to florida in a couple months and do some porn mag. Shes givin up all hope, and I really think thats why she hasnt come back. She doesnt think Ill ever change, she doesnt think she'll get our kids back, and more importantly she doesnt think I'll get them back if she comes home. I talk to her tonight and she started crying, I told her the reason I fell for her, the reason I stayed with her, why I am still fighting to be with her, and why I think I controlled her so much. She said she cant forgive me though, I dont know about that one, kinda sounded like BS when she said it. But she heard me, I know she did cause she was balling, of course then she let me go. Too much reality I suppose. But I know as I've told her all the long we can do this. And the thing is, I cant stop talking to her, I cant cut her off. If she was a drink, I'd be the worst alcholic, but shes not. Shes the my girl, even now. I promised her I would never turn my back on her, and I wont. I really appericate what you said, but thats the one thing I wont do. So whats the other way??????? I gotta believe that love will win out in the end. Granted I dont chase her, I let her run. I just hope at some point she'll see clearly. In the mean time, like I said consuling, career hunting, exercise (starting to buff out again too ), but yeah.. I've never loved someone so strongly, as a boyfriend, as a friend, as a father, and even as a son, all to this one person. It dont feel right to turn my back on her, so I dont. I just dont know what else to do.

Ok, so I was 22 she 17, we met at work (a pizza place), flirted a little, went our separate ways for awhile. We kissed twice during the summer, then didnt see each other again until Nov 2, 2001. We dated for a couple months then she moved in with me. 3 days later we found out she was pregnate with our fiirst child. She had just turned 18. I love her with everything in my soul, and its difficult to even write this as I'm forced with the realization that we're so far apart now. But yeah, shes bi-polar/borderline, and was molested as a young teen by her stepfather and brothers. We had some of these most wonderful times together, but I couldnt trust her, because she cheated on me several times. So I played the controlling/jealous boyfriend alot. We had a second daughter just a year after our first, and things were looking good for the future. So I finally purposed on sweetest day, we were to be married july 25 of this year. But, this last March my mom(who she was close to) commited sucide the day after the two of them had a fight (she was schzophrenic). So shes promises she will never leave me, and I beg her not too. 2 and a half weeks later we get in a fight. Stupid stuff, I wanted help cleaning and she was tired. She lied to me about going out for coffee, dressed up like a whore and went to a club. I caught her. Then of course I said something about her and my moms fight, and that was that. In a couple days she slept with a 35 year old guy(shes 20 now, im 25) who she now lives with and like 6 other people in a junky run down flop house. But for like 3 weeks she'd come over, spend the night, we'd make love, and things looked like they might work out. Well they didnt, we got in another couple fights, and Childerns Services took our kids, and said they wouldnt give them back if we were together. Which i think is BS, because if we just worked out our problems they wouldnt have a choice. But since the kids have been gone things have changed. She now works for an escort service, and has gotten all wrapped up in her new scene. She still comes over, and calls, but doesnt want to talk about us a t all. In fact she gets really pissed anytime I do. We usally kiss a couple times while shes here, but just a peck or so. She gets pretty bored and uncomfortable sometimes while shes here and I just started working again so I havent had the money to take her out. I lost a huge part of who I am when she left, I tell her stuff like that all the time, I've been going to consuling and doing open mic nights, which she usally goes to, but nothing is working. She still cuddles with me once in while, but wont sleep with me and defintaly doesnt talk about coming home. She lies about what shes doing and to her new boyfriend about me and coming over. All in all, I miss her so much. I'm hurting just watching her screw up her life and future, and I dont know what to do to get her back. She still says she loves me, and I tell her I love her too. We do the I love you thing, but she wont usally say it in front of her boyfriend, and says I love you to her boyfriend even when I'm around. I'm lost. I tried not talking to her, screened my calls, didnt call her back., over memorial day weekend, but that didnt work. It didnt feel right. We broken up before but never this long. I'm scared. Despite all thats happened, I know shes the one for me, and I for her. I dont know what else to do. i've been trying to date again, not telling her of course, although she says she wants me to. But, I dont feel right leading these girls on, when I know if she said she wanted to get back together I'd drop them in a second. This is a really long post so I stop rambling. I've already been told by all my friends and family to let her go, but thats not what I willing to do. I want my baby back, I want kids back, and I want my family back. My life back. So if anyone has some advice for a relationship that is in desperate need of a miracle please dont hold back. I've always believed that anything can be accomplished with love, I know its dangerous but in many ways i do need her. What do I do?