Hey everyone..this seems like a friendly, supportive place so I thought I'd become a member. I've gotten various opinions already, but more feedback is always welcome. My 'issue' (kinda minor) here is a bit lenghty..anyone kind enough to read it and offer some input is a sweetheart..here goes...
My friends and I enjoy seeing this indie band that plays in the city every now and then. The 2nd time we saw them, we hung out with them after the show and I made the mistake of hooking up with the lead singer..we didn't sleep together, just made out. I felt a connection that night that I thought was mutual, based on his behavior and emailed him the following night to let him know I had a great time. He responded a few days later, really late at night, and basically told me he had a great time too and was tired and headed to bed. I (being the nitpicker I am) felt the email was half-assed, so I just let it go, realizing that 'duh!' Musicians get more ass than a toilet seat! Still, I enjoy the band and didn't let that stop me from going back to their shows.
So far I have been to 3 of his shows (after 'the hookup')and each time he behaved the same way...a bit sheepish, as if he couldn't think of anything to say to me. The first time (a few months later) was the most awkward. I played it cool when he approached me during intermission, and tried to talk about the music and his new CD. Neither one of us brought anything up about what had happened in the past. He shyly thanked me for coming, and I told him, “of course,” and he said he was gonna get a drink and be back. With that, I joined two of my guy friends for a cigg outside.
When I came back inside, he was mingling, doing band stuff..we both kinda avoided each other for the remainder of the night...I figured the awkwardness would end after that night, but it didn't.
The last time we went to their show was for their new CD release. Again, I played it cool. I admit I avoided him a bit again this time. He approached me, waved his hand in my face, and put his arm around me. I handed him the CD, he signed it, and I resumed to talkin with my friends and his bandmates. I can never tell if he is trying to initiate conversation. He sorta hovered about a bit, but I paid him no mind. I wasn't a (b-word) but I wasn't overly friendly either.
Later, I am outside, hanging with random people, and he emerges with his instruments, going back and forth to their cargo van. He comes up to me again, gives me another hug and says "Thanks for coming." I respond, "Absolutely," and he says, "…even though you don't like me anymore." I try to brush it off, and say that ain't true...but he kinda stands there, looking down at his feet, then looking up and telling me he liked the way my hair looked that night. I thank him, and complimented him right back, which was followed by more feet shuffling, averted eye contact, and sheepish half-grin on his part, as if to tell me my compliment wasn’t sincere. I just give him a giggly, "Dude, what's your deal?" And his response was a soft, "What's YOUR deal?" I dismiss it and resume my convo with someone else. He's hovering about near me again. Meanwhile, there are about half a dozen other chicks (really cute chicks) hanging around, overtly seeking his attention and gushingly saying his name, asking if he would be going to some bar. Eventually he goes to them.
The band was then on its way to an aftershow gathering. He comes back and extends the invite to our group. We opted to call it a night instead.
Am I doing something wrong? I feel I am giving him the wrong impression somehow, and he might be wondering why I keep showing up at his shows. All I want to make clear is that I am there to hear them play, have fun with my friends, and show my support as a fan..no ulterior motives, no hidden agenda.
I am not there to interfere in his game, nor do I give off that impression…at least, I don’t think so. I keep my distance for chrissake, The other guys are cool as hell. I don't understand why he continues to act so shady. All we ever did was make out and that was about 6 months ago.
Whatever his reason may be, I don’t want him to feel uncomfortable around me..it makes ME uncomfortable too...and I absolutely LOVE this band. My friends and I have a blast when they play. I really don't wanna stop going to their shows. Gah! What to do?
