My experience with online dating....

[donwondellanooch]

What a long and unsuccessful journey it has been. I still have not found a reasonable partner since my last one about 3 years ago. That relationship was 4 years btw, but she left me for a much older guy and had his baby at age 21. Anyhow, here is what I did find online though..... (the complete list!) (and no, I have not found a date at all since that 4 year relationship unless I found the person online)

 

May '04: Denise: I had gotten out of a 4 year relationship 6 months prior to meeting her and when I met her in person she was extremely desperate. She ended up asking me out the day I met her. She was somewhat bad looking, but not overweight so I agreed thinking that maybe she would look better the next time I saw her. She even kissed me that same day and it was gross, but I went with it for a month thinking that she might fix herself up. She ended up inviting me to her prom and I went since I had never been to one before. Shortly after that I left her because I just wasnt able to like her in that way. I figured that I would try to work things out with her initally since she was the first girl interested in me in 6 months. In other words I wanted to give her a chance and see if I could like her. That was a killer mistake. She was also a total prude. I gave her oral and she did not even return the favor, ever....She was kind of mean at times too.

 

Jan 05: Amanda: hung out several times. Was attracted to her. Asked her out eventually and she said no and that she was not currently looking for that type of relationship.

 

(This is where I took a little break from online dating. I guess you can say I sort of gave up. By '06 I resumed my journey.)

 

April '06: Gena: Was very good looking. At first she seemed really into me but when we actually hung out things changed. She started playing crazy mind games with me so I could not figure out if she was interested or not. I never asked her out because she always acted more interested in other guys and not me.

 

May '06: Janice: Hung out with her once and she was not that bad looking, but I decided I did not like her as a person. I feel she felt the same way as she got in her car and ditched me when she had the chance. I never heard from her again.

 

May '06: Nicole: Was somewhat overweight, and not good looking but actually pretty cool. She was a little bit clingy and obviously was trying to get with me. I tried to show that I was not interested and eventually I lost touch with her.

 

May '06: Ashley: was gross looking, but not overweight. I kept contact with her because she had a hot friend that I was trying to get with. I found out that her friend was whorey though, so I never asked her out because she was such a swinger. I did kiss her friend though at her own request, but that didnt last long as she said I was a "bad kisser." I still hang out with them periodicly.

 

November '06: Jen : Hung out with her twice. I was attracted to her. The first time she seemed interested and made plans to hang out with me again. After the second time she stopped talking to me and I found out a couple days later that she had found a boyfriend.

 

Febuary '07: Melissa: Was overweight and I was not attracted to her. Was extremely clingy and would not leave me alone. She would call me at 6am up until 2am multiple times a day. The text messages were even worse. I did not want to hurt her feelings and I totally would have hung out with her as a friend if she was not so clingy, but I had no choice but to ignore her calls since she was so annoying and I could not deal with it. I think she was obsessed with me.

 

I don't find this pathetic since its impossible to meet my type of woman in a bar. Also, note that I will meet anyone in person regardless of how bad their pictures/profile actually are. I do this because there is such a thing as bad pictures or a bad profile. I give everyone the same opportunity.

 

I feel that by the time I meet the 100th girl online things will actually work out Agree? Disagree?

[Orlander]

Well, donwon, I can only say that I believe the reason you are unable to find someone to date might have something to do with your perspective and attitude.

 

 

Orlander

[zippitt]

I dont think his attitude was off at all...He went on the dates even when his first impression was he might not ever be attracted to them.

 

He simply wasn't attracted to the girls he dated from the sound of it.

 

I have done a lot of online dating myself, more so then regular dating. The sad fact is all the girls I have actually had a relationship with I have met offline. This is due the fact that the chemistry you create in person can in no way be recreated online or on the phone. It's not to say that when you meet that person that chemistry won't be there.

 

Online dating works backwards, you get to know the person before the true chemistry starts. Offline you meet the person, sparks fly, and then you learn about the SO. Of course this is not true for every instance, but this is an accurate generalization.

 

I like the part where you said you would go on a date with anyone regardless of the pic. You are absolutely right doing this. My last gf had a horrible myspace pic. I was given her myspace link from a mutual friend, because of the pic I told my friend I wasn't interested meeting her. My friend convinced me she was cute so I went on the date and we hit it off. I wouldn't say she was cute, but much more attractive then her pic and we got along great.

 

Online dating is a tough cookie, it has a stigma to it as well as a different dating technique. My only recommendation is you meet people before you spend too long before talking to them or you could be in for a huge disappointment.

[Aurian]

I dunno, you can look at pic and tell if there is room for a spark of attraction. A pic doesn't have to be super great looking, but if you look at the picture and all you can think about is how ugly they are, there isn't much room for attraction to grow is there? People do become more attractive when you get to know them and like them, but to me, there has to be something appealing about their looks to begin with. And everyone has their own idea of what is appealing.

 

Maybe be a bit more selective? A bad profile too... I learned early on if there is a bad profile, they probably wouldn't be a good date!!! People should be putting their best foot forward, so if you're thinking their profile is bad, they're either rushed, doing it for a lark, or you're not compatible.

 

Worked for me though. I found my share of creeps, but I also found a wonderful, nice (in a good way boyfriend who I'm definitely falling for.