need some advice, please.

[rodney]

update on --> w ww.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?p=1468878#post1468878

 

yeah, yesterday I logged into msn and she wrote...

 

Her - hi, u know what I was thinking about today?

Me - what?

Her - that I owe you a visit to the movies

 

(last year I payed for her ticket for the movies)

 

Me - haha oh yeah I payed for your ticket back then...

Her (waited about 40 sec to reply) - how is everything?

...right after she wrote that, my computer got ****ed up so I had to restart it!

when I came back online I started the convo and apologized and told her that I had to restart and I asked her what she was saying before I left and she replied "how is everything?" and she asked how my day was..you know the casual talk..

 

my question is, does this mean she's interested or what????

and another thing, she asked me when my birthday is, (coming up soon) and I "guess"...wait, I know she will buy me a present...are these good signs?

and what should I do?? I think I made a mistake not bringing back up the "I owe you a movie visit"!

[Newo Ikkin]

Sounds like she is interested...but was a bit threw off by your reply. I'm guessing she wanted you to play her game.

 

Just say sometime..."So...about that owed trip to the movies??"

[Dating Coach]

rodney, if she is interested in you she's going to get very tired of you shuffling your feet. All you seem to be doing is waiting for permission. Lat year she told you that you guys would eventually get together, but you did nothing. You've been hanging around her forever now wondering if she likes you yet you do nothing. Even now she sends you this email and yet you did nothing.

 

All you are doing is shuffling your feet waiting for her to give permission. What, is she your parent? DO you think she's looking forward to being romantically involved with a servant? That's the role you've been filling my friend. You've been paying for her movie tickets, you hang out with her, etc and you do nothing. It's time for you to stop doing nothing and start taking some friggin action like a guy with a pair would!

 

For instance, when she emails you and says: "Hi, u know what I was thinking about today? That I owe you a visit to the movies." You need to be more aggressive and flirty: "You know, I was just thinking the same thing and was about to call you to collect! You're not getting any more free passes from me woman! Since it's my turn and I get to pick, I was thinking this Friday at 7:15... if you're nice enough to me I might not make you buy the popcorn..."

 

You also need to step up your self assertiveness. You need to stop waiting for her and start taking care of yourself. If you like her set up a date with her and tell her it's a date. Tell her you're tired of being "just friends". If she isn't ready right now then all of her actions have been saying that she isn't interested in you romantically. No matter what spews out of her mouth, ACTIONS speak louder than WORDS and she's full of it-for whatever reason.

 

Stop shuffling your feet, stop asking for direction and simply start DOING. That's my advice.

[addictedblue]

i'm with her ^. stop being a wuss and be more assertive.

[rodney]

sh*t, you both right. I been acting like a wuss..for real, I'll be more assertive from now on.

[ghost69]

way to go.

[rodney]

ok, so I reminded her about the movies today...I tried to be more assertive like u guys said...

here's the conv. (I'll call her "J" in the conv.)

 

me - hey, its a good thing that you reminded me that you owe me a visit to the movies

J - =)

J - or I can just let it be

J - haha naa, just kidding

me - let it be?? hell naw, I think we should go to the movies during the holidays (we have one weeks holiday, it ends on this monday)

J - I dont have any time, im sorry

me - when can you?

J - I have too much work from school, haven't done anything yet

me - ok tell me when you have time

J - or I can give u a ticket and you can go whenever you want to

J - no strings attached

J - ok?

me - say what? I came along when I payed for your ticket..

J - heeehhhh, true so truee

J - but I'll never have time

me - make time

J - give me time

J - I'll make time

me - u better

me - just tell me when you have time

me - no stress

J - ok

J - =) sure

 

What The F***???? I was too nice to her, I just realized it..what should I do now..I was thinking I remind her once more, if her attitude is the same, then F it..

[Dating Coach]

You weren't too nice, you just need to work on your flirting skills. Instead of saying: "Make time, you better" you could say something more along the lines of, "You're so cheap you don't want to pay for 2 tickets, is that it!" Something along the lines of teasing more than being forceful.

[rodney]

if she doesn't bring up the movie thing herself, should I remind her? if yes, then how long should I wait?

[Dating Coach]

if she doesn't bring up the movie thing herself, should I remind her? if yes, then how long should I wait?

 

If you have to remind her then she's probably not interested.

[rodney]

I think I'ma let this girl go because she just told me that she's talking to her ex again..I really like this girl but I'll let her go because I know if I don't, it will only hurt me in the long run..

[ghost69]

good idea. let her make the choices to pursue you. stay out of it.

[rodney]

I don't get her, when ever I log into msn she always starts a conversation and talks to me, asks whats up and asks about my day...maybe she's trying to make me jealous using her ex? I dunno...and these latest days have felt good becuase we're starting to become more ''tight'' like we used to be..she even asked me if I want to go to a reagge festival with her on august..I said maybe...and she's been paying more attention to me then before..what can this mean???

[ghost69]

well, she sees you being around through longer than the summer if she is already talking about august. she seems kind of crazy to me.

[rodney]

well, she sees you being around through longer than the summer if she is already talking about august. she seems kind of crazy to me.

 

we're graduating this july so I dunno....maybe she doesn't want to let me go?? what the hell should I do

[ghost69]

just chill. don't give her to much attention. let her pursue you though.

[rodney]

ok, I haven't given her so much attention these few days..but for I how long should I chill?? if I chill too much, she'll think I'm not interested, which is not true.

[ghost69]

let her contact you.