Day 40 of Misery- Will It Ever End?

This is Horrible · February 10, 2007

today is day 40 since my ex of 19 months dumped me.

i broke no contact of 30 days yesterday, pretty much begging her to take me back. she said that she misses me and she is not over me, she also thanked me for caring about her from Day One and loving her as much as I did, but she thinks the break up is the best idea and she is sticking to it.

what the hell happened to all of her talk of how she loved me so much and how she wanted to spend the rest of her life with me, etc etc etc????

i took her on the first date of her life and she was almost 23 years old when this happened. does she think that she is just going to go out and find someone who would do anything in the world for her?

is there any chance we ever get back together and is there any chance this pain will go away?

i still do not have an appetite, cant sleep and spend every second of the day thinking of her.

this sucks so much...i never want to feel like this again.:sad: :sad:

lady00 · February 10, 2007

40 days is nothing...time will really help you feel better. Yesterday was a big set-back for you. I just got dumped today but the relationship was nowhere near as long as yours and I'm still pretty hurt by it. I think you just have to keep doing NC and things will get better. Unless for some reason you must talk to her...it will probably make things harder on you if you do. Good luck. Time heals.

Wandering_Sword · February 10, 2007

Try not to think of the "chance to get back together" as that will knock you each and every time. You have to approach the situation from the point of her leaving and never wanting to see you again or to pretend that she is dead and buried. Hope is good to have but bad if it interferes with your healing. It seems that you underwent NC with the hope of getting her back. Getting her back through NC is a possible byproduct but not a necessarily a result.

The pain will go away, eventually, but you will be feeling it every step of the way. So prepare for an extremely long haul of pain, doubt, regret and self-condemnation. But that is why you're here, to disperse it amongst us because we can help you shoulder some of that burden.

And to wonder what her life will be like without you, or whether she could ever possibly find somebody as good as you is no more your concern. She is out of your life and thereforeeee beyond your concerns. It's thinking like that that will set you back in the healing process. You have to start taking of you. And that means eating again, sleeping and having a full life.

Sure it seems like a Herculean task, but trust me it can be done if you choose to. If not, then I have wasted my words.

Good luck and keep strong. I have faith in you.

numbhead · February 10, 2007

to be honest mate,, theres no chance... ive been waiting for the same outcome since end of november!!

wondering sword--And to wonder what her life will be like without you, or whether she could ever possibly find somebody as good as you is no more your concern. She is out of your life and thereforeeee beyond your concerns.

this is the hardest thing to stop thinking about.... i cant stop thinking about her leaving me behind (so to speak).... i really miss her and fantasize about what she is doing ... then get a blunt blow in the heart when i realise she may be with someone else...

.. and that girl who not so long ago said she would love me forever and spend the rest of her life with me... was lying and is moving on with her life with no regard for me whatso ever.....

i would have died for her..... now im just left feeling like a directionless, weak, pathetic jealous ex!