Help needed with a break!!

[j201714]

I broke up with my live in boyfriend of 2 yrs over a silly argument he never aplogised and i was still angry so i packed his bags he came round that night and picked them up.

 

i said some things i didnt mean about his job which i am sure really hurt him. I rang him the next day to ask if he wanted to meet up with me to talk things over he said he was working and would ring me on mon this was sat. True to his word he did at 9.00am in the morning we had a nice conversation and i told him i loved him and i was very sorry and to come home. he said you can do all the things you want to do without me being a milestone (as i have always harboured a dream to move to spain and he has very large debts) i said i didnt want that and i wanted to bulid a life with him he (as we planned to get engaged this year)he said you feel like that now but you will change your mind. he asked if he could come round and get the rest of his stuff which he did.

 

i helped him pack and said i loved him, we laughed as we went through our pictures. He said he just needs to be single for while and get his head sorted and see what happens in a few months he said he has been angry for what i said and now he is just numb( when i asked how long he felt numb he said his feelings had chenged since the night i chuked him out and the things i said have hurt him deeply).

 

i did really aplogise to him he said he still wants to be friends and he really respects me. He kept saying he wanted to be friends over and over again. I helped him with his stuff to the car he had tears in his eyes we hugged and kissed on the cheek.

 

We have a lot of things to sort such as belongigs and debts but now 2 weeks on he will not speak to me i ring and he dosent answer i have only rung about 6 times over the 2 weeks so i havent been pestering him(even though all i want to do is ring him !!!).

 

so is he still hurt by the things i said to him and he is trying to get back at me?? how can i get him back???

 

we had just been on holiday before this and had a pefect time we do argue but not often we told each other everyday we loved each other, we had a great sex life and told each other everything, there was no steady declne in our relationship i thought i would be with this man for the rest of my life.

 

I have really tried to get on with my life going out and working and things but i just cant get him off my mind. Is there any reason of why he wont answer his phone to me????

 

he is shy senstive and sweet no arrogance at all. what now?? I am 20 he is 25

[Heretic]

Hey j201714 welcome to eNotalone!

 

Unfortunately it sounds to me that your ex is making good on his decision to be single for a while and clear his head out. That said there isn't much you can do at this point but weather the storm. If you keep calling it will bother him if it hasn't already. 6 times in 2 weeks might not seem like a lot (I don't feel that's too often) however it's all a matter of perspective so he might feel this is too often.

 

What you need to understand is that sometimes people need their space and sometimes conversations like the argument you had serve as real eye-openers for people. He might have realized that there is something else bothering him or even be trying to fix something you mentioned. It's really hard to say what's going through his mind other then "I need space".

 

Give him the space he desires and he'll call you if he feels like it. Otherwise you'll scare away any intention he had of contacting you in the first place.

 

I hope this helps.

[mo]

I suggest give him a space for a while, hopefully he might come back. Do not be too apologic, you have already apologised many times. Keep cool and quite for sometime and see what will happen. God Bless You All.

[j201714]

The advice does help thankyou i just wish he would tell me if there is something else that needs dealing with in our relationship, we always said we would say if something was bothering us and i thought we always have.

 

i just dont understand why he wont answer my calls after he said he wanted to be friends and it was left nicely no shouting or argueing.

[mo]

As I said earlier - Keep cool for time-being..