Could I Really Be In Love?

[jdathome]

I have to get feedback on my problem because it's really affecting my life. I have worked with a woman for over 1 1/2 years. Ever since we met each other sparks flew and I fell head over heels for her. She knew I was attracted to her but I have a girlfriend and she is also married. She left the company and we have had some awkward conversations/texts about wanting to be together but feeling guilty. We keep making time to go out but then I back off last minute because of my apprehension. The last text she told me she was in love with me and wanted to be with me. I have never answered her back and I know I have hurt her. She keeps texting me what happened to me but I shut her out. The problem is I can't stop thinking about her. I have a very active social life and meet lots of people all the time but I see her face in every girl I talk to. It especially hurts when I'm alone at home, I think about being with her and it hurts. Could I really be in love? Don't know if I should go for it or not. We'd both be disrespecting our SO's.

[LilyXX]

Sounds like you are in love.

[LilyXX]

Wheather you should go for it or not has to be your/her decision.

I would.

[addictedblue]

ask yourself some questions. do you like her more than your girlfriend? what if you break it off with your gf and she with her husband and it doesn't work with you two, how would you feel then? there's two sides. either you should just move on and in time you'll get over her, or use the "i only live once" philosophy and go for it. since you think you might be in love with her that shows you don't really love your girlfriend anymore. and if she told you she loves you too, then she must not feel it for her husband. you can't be "in love" with two people otherwise its not actually love. if that is the case than i'd say go for it.

[BeStrongBeHappy]

It is never wise to start an affair with a married person for all kinds of reasons... although she says she loves you, you may be nothing but the third leg of a triangle that involves games with her husband.

 

if her marriage isn't viable, then she should be leaving it first and then pursuing other people. but the fact that she is still married and living with him while toying with you means she is NOT ready to leave her marriage yet, or wants to take you for a spin before she decides you are better than her husband. the same should apply to your girlfriend... do you love her enough to be faithful? doesn't sound like it, maybe you should break up with her, but that should NOT be dependent on this other woman, but on the worth of your relationship.

 

you could also be thinking so much about the married woman because she is a fantasy, something that is intrigueing, but that is not the same as love... if you haven't spent a lot of time together one on one and really gotten to know each other as individuals outside your relationship, then you are risking a lot on a fantasy and a hope...

 

so if you are willing to break up with your girlfriend and have done so, and she breaks up with her husband, THEN i would consider dating her, but not until then... otherwise you are starting a relationship in deception, and neither of you will ever really trust the other person, how do you know she wouldn't do the same thing to you once she is involved with you?