My grandpa died, my boyfriend left...I feel so empty

[whatsagirltodo]

My grandpa died yesterday. He had a heart attack about a month ago and was in the hospital all that time...

 

Now the only person I want to run to is my exboyfriend who was always there for me and always made me feel better. I gave in and called him twice today - no answer, and he doesn't have an answering machine - he won't know i called unless he decides to look at his caller ID (which he probably won't).

 

I feel so lost and confused. I've had someone in my family die every year for the past three years. I've had 5 people die in the last 8 years. My family is plagued. I'm miserable right now. I technically lost 2 people I love in less than 2 weeks, considering i haven't talked to my ex in 13 days.

 

I know I shouldn't call my ex, but i'm hurting soo bad right now and i honestly have no one else.

 

...where do i go from here?

[Portage]

What about a girlfriend to unload on?

 

I'm so sorry to hear what you're going through. Such an awful loss. i love my grandparents and would feel the same sense of loss you are experiencing.

 

Keep expressing yourself on here if you find it helps. We are listening.

[desertnomad]

I'm really sorry to hear about your loss whatsagirltodo. Do you have any friends or family you can be with? Keep posting on here.

[Phoenix_girl]

I know how you feel. I have had 6 deaths in my family in 2 years and it definitely takes it's toll. I would say talk to a friend, someone you feel comfortable with. It's natural that you feel drawn to someone who was always there for you, but if he isn't really in your life right now then reaching out to him might only end up hurting you more (esp if he rejects you or doesn't want to help).

Talk to a close friend or a family member you are close with

[Hope75]

I'm sorry to hear of the loss of your grandfather.

 

((HUGS))

 

I don't think your ex is the person to call about this though. You guys are broken up, and as painful as that is, he can't be expected to be the one to get you through this.

 

Someone suggested a girlfriend that you can call and lean on, and that is a great idea. Do you have someone like that?

[whatsagirltodo]

I honestly don't have a good friend to confide in. My boyfriend was my best friend - he WAS that friend that I could tell everything to and do everything with.

 

I moved a few times and only have one real friend that I'm in contact with and lives close to me (we've known eachother pretty much our whole lives) - but she is an entirely different story in itself...I can't break down to her, and it's hard to explain why without nearly writing a novel.

 

My family is a different story too. Everything is chaotic right now - my grandfather passing is just like the icing on the cake.

 

...I emailed my ex this morning and I called him about an hour ago. He seemed nice on the phone and told me he would call me back (he was at work). He called me back and started going off on me again about the "incident" which was like 2 weeks ago. He's still pissed off and I guess he's never going to get over it - so I'm done. That was the closure I needed. I think he's looking for any excuse to be pissed off at me and push me away and that was the best excuse he could get.

 

So I'm done with him, and still no one to confide in. I am sooo alone.

[Hope75]

Hey Girl,

 

So yeah, your ex is not the guy to confide in about this- that is the bad part about being broken up.

 

But you can talk to us about it- why not talk about your feelings here?