Should I be worried? Am I thinking the impossible?

[Metallica Lightning]

I have a very healthy relationship with my ex-wife, and my son and daughter. My kids are 21 and 16, my daughter is older. Both are great kids, they have productive hobbies, they make good grades, etc...

The problem is though, my son and daughter don't see eachother very often, and they've developed a different relationship than most siblings.

Anyway, this past Thanksgiving, my ex-wife called me, and told me she saw Carrie and Christian (My kids) laying on the couch, under a blanket, holding hands and snuggling eachother. I wasn't very suspicious about it at first, but at my family's portion of thanksgiving, I saw her eating chocolate icing off his finger. And then later that night, they chose to sleep in the same bed. The bedroom they slept in had no closet, and the thought of them changing infront of eachother makes me cringe.

 

Should I be worried that my own two children are doing....Something...Or do you just think it's an affectionate relationshp?

Thoughts? Opinions?

[saint_saul]

First -- great album (ride the lightning, definitely one of my favorite).

 

Second, what you've described sounds kind of odd. At age 21 and 16, I would think they would both have social lives outside each other -- or have been around eachother enough not to want that sort of intimacy. Sleeping in the same bed, licking icing, and cuddling under blankets is certianly not an idea I would entertain with my own siblings. Of course, is it possible your exwife misinterpreted all of this? For the sleep thing, maybe they just stayed up late talking and fell asleep -- just a possibility. Perhaps your exwife/you should have a talk with your daughter, or both, but separately.

[southerngirl]

Yes, it should cause concern.

 

Like was suggested above talk to them both separately and ask them if there is something going on. You may know just from the reaction if in fact their is.

 

YOu said that they dont see eachother often and have developed a different relationship than most siblings. In what way? How often is not very often?

[unface]

Snuggling at that age.... no way. There is nothing right about that.

 

Just out of curiosity, if you found out something *was* going on... what would you do?

[Metallica Lightning]

Oh God.

I come back from getting groceries for my parents, and my father asks me, "Do Carrie and Chris take showers together?"

I freaked out, and I ripped into the bathroom. Carrie was naked while Christian had his boxers on; Carrie had just turned on the shower.

I confronted them about it and I got mixed reactions. Carrie seemed to feel guilty, and silent, while Christian appeared irate and offended. Christian left immediately, and went and watched TV with m grandmother, and Carrie took a shower.

They are in there rom together right now, and I've heard a bit of laughter, and some other interesting sounds.

I think I should barge in, but my conscious is telling me I'm being paranoid

[sonjam]

No, you are not being paranoid. If they were two and three years old seeing each other naked, taking a bath together and sharing a bed is not a problem, at age 21 and 16?? YOU HAVE A PROBLEM ON YOUR HANDS. I think you should talk to them, each separately, urgently.

[Helen67]

Such a difficult situation! At least you are not alone in your fears, your ex wife has also noticed this parculiarality, so she seems to me the perfect person to talk this through with. I hope then you can join forces, and figure out the best way to approach this very very delicate situation.

 

It certainly doesn't sound like a normal sibling relationship, so you should take it seriously. I'm hoping that someone could come on here and shed some light for you, personally I cannot, but wish I could say more. Perhaps there is a hotline in the U.S that could advice you and your ex wife how to deal with this.

 

Anyway good luck, and keep us posted if you have a chance! I hope we are all wrong.

 

Helen.

[unface]

This sounds kind of fishy to me. No one can possibly be that clueless.

 

He's just using us to play out some of his private fantasies.