My relationship was based on a lie

[jgryl05]

My boyfriend and I met on the internet about a year and he thought that I was older than I really am. I'm really 16 years old and I'm African American and I made him believe that I was 17 and White and he is 21 and White.. So we talked alot and started calling each other on the phone and the relationship got so much better but it was based on a lie. I love him so much that I couldnt bring myself to tell him the truth cus then he would never want to speak to me again. I tried breaking up with him but I couldnt do it unless I told him the truth.I finally did this summer and he was actually ok with it. He still wanted to be with me no matter who I was. We got to meet once but after that it seems like he had been avoiding me. And I had to move to Tn while hes in Ohio starting college. The first week he is ignoring my calls and not calling me back but when i talked to him he said how much he loves me. Then I come to find out that he started seeing another girl as soon as he moved in and told me that now it bothers him that I lied and its not going to work out. I begged and pleaded for him to take me back but I dont know if its really that he cant trust or that I'm black. I really want him back because I love him so much and I feel horrible for lying to him and hurting him. Should I try and get him to trust me again and take me back and how? Or should I move on with my life though I feel like I will never be able to get over the love we share?

[mermayd]

Why in the world would you be ashamed of your skin color to begin with? All people are beautiful and there is absolutely no need to pretend you are someone different. I am so sorry you feel that you have to hide your true identity. I dont think you being black has any weight in the outcome of your relationship. I think your bf cared for you as a person and I dont think anything regarding looks mattered in the least otherwise he wouldnt have started an online relatiosnhip to begin with. He loved YOU, your values, morals, personality. Not your hair, skin, body. I think he is skeptical of being with you only because you lied to him about who you are which shows that you are not secure with yourself and that can take a toll on him and a relationship. I am glad that you came forward and admitted the truth to him and I hope in the future you will not hide who you are and be true to yourself and others. I would apologize to your guy for lying to him, but I dont think he feels that he can fully trust you from here on out. if you lie about this, what else could you lie about? Try to make ammends with him but if things dont work out, try to be understanding.

[party_of_italy]

Oh come on, everyone lies about who they are on the internet. she didn't know that it was going to turn into something with a real relationship involved. that's rare to form over the internet. but jgyrl, i don't mean to be harsh, i'm just trying to keep it real here, i think that he may have feelings for this other girl that he started to see. and if that is the case that is the reason why he all of the sudden brings up you lying to him. he's trying to make you think that because you lied to him, is the reason for him not wanting to be with you. sorry but it sounds like that's what he's doing.