Stupid me!

[stunned]

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. I hope all of you are having a good day and are able to spend part of it with friends or family. I hope no one minds me venting about being mad at myself.

 

I'm stuck home today--we're getting a winter storm so I've not been able to get out to try to stay busy. In a momemt of weakness, I drafted an email to my ex and sent it, breaking 1 week of NC. (This is the first Thanksgiving in 7 years that we've not been together.) To make matters worse, I then tried phoning. Fortunately, no one was home or they chose not to anwer when looking at CID. Now I'm sitting here thinking what a fool I am. I'm hoping our storm eases up enough to get out tomorrow (although they're calling for it to last through Sunday). Wow, if this breakup had to happen, I wish it had happened in the spring or summer. Not being able to get out is driving me nuts, all I seem to do is focus on is how much I miss my ex. I'll be glad when friends start arriving back home later this weekend. Even if the weather's bad, I can phone them. Sorry to vent everyone, but it feels better.

[Lady Bugg]

Awww Stunned...don't beat yourself up!! 7 years is a LONG time with someone!! Holidays are the WORST time to deal with a breakup! I have had PLENTY of times when I've broken NC.....it set me back...but the good news is you can always start over again. So don't be so hard on yourself....it gets easier.

 

I read a good thread someone wrote....for every day they stuck to NC, they put $5.00 in a jar....and within a certain time frame they were to use that money to treat themselves for sticking to it.

 

Happy Thanksgiving!!!!

[BeStrongBeHappy]

Happy thanksgiving! Holidays are hard when one has recently broken up, especially from a long term relationship, so try to be kind to yourself and not judge yourself too harshly, just get right back on the NC wagon!

 

Do you have TV that you could watch? i've always found that watching movies on TV (especially comedies that cheer you up) helps take the mind off things. And do you have any good mystery books or novels to read? they usually really get you involved and take the mind off things.

 

good luck, and it will get easier!

 

Also, thank goodness for surfing! start researching something that interests you, or plan a future vacation by checking out potential locations, always a good thing to look at pictures of the beach in the middle of a blizzard!

[stunned]

Thank you for the moral support. I've been trying to stay busy around the house and have had the dogs out to play several times. I find its better for me to get out of the house, but the weather doesn't permit it now. I'll just make myself focus more on some projects that will eat up time. I've got an idea for the newest not-for-profit that I joined last week that I'll work on so I've got it ready to present to them when we meet next. Again, thanks.

[D1886]

Hey, I'm sorry about your break up. Me and my ex gf were together for 2.5 years, we broke up this summer, then were "dating" in October. 2 days ago she told me it was over for good. I'm in college so all my friends went home and I'm sitting here, very sad (I had to work or else I would go home). She went home with her family and friends, so I keep thinking horrible thoughts like she will find one of her guy friends from back home to hook up with, or she's talking to one of her friends from our school. I don't know, it hurts and I know it will for a long time.

[D1886]

Another thing is during our break before dating again, she slept with another guy, and that is killing me to think about, and it pops into my head here and there. I just feel really betrayed, thinking about her actually doing this. Then I think what she's doing now that she's in the same town as this guy and other guy's and everything, I'm just so hurt, man, this sucks, I can't stop thinking about it

[stunned]

D1886,

 

I feel your pain, too. 2.5 years is a long time for a relationship. I hope you were able to enjoy today's holiday a little. Did you have a Thanksgiving meal out in public (at a restaruant or a friend's house)? I hope there's something enjoyable that you can do tomorrow to help keep your mind off your ex. Staying busy out-of-the-house seems the best way for me to keep my mind off my ex. If the weather had been better here I would have gotten away from the house today.

 

The good news is that all of us in this position have this forum as a support tool. Friends and family are wonderful, but after a period of time, they may not understand why we still have feelings of sadness and loss. (My extended family was tired of hearing about it from me by 5th day after my ex left.) It's wonderful to have this forum. I hope that you can find something to do to occupy yourself. That can be so hard to do on a day like today, but it does seem to help. I've made myself develop a project to keep me busy since I just couldn't concentrate on anything else.

 

Keep coming back here for support. You're among friends. We can all understand your pain and sense of loss. You're not alone, friend.

[D1886]

I went and had a burrito at a mexican restaurant, and have been sitting around the house all day. I'm working tomorrow from 6 in the morning till 10 that night at the mall, so that will be crazy.

 

I just can't believe how much easier this is for her. She's with all her family, and friends, and I'm sure she's moving on so much faster and easier, thinking I'm just one person out of her life, when she has all her other family, friends, and guys around her in a comfortable, normal setting she's used to.

 

Keep writing on here to let your feelings out. I want to cause like you, my family and friends wouldn't understand or definitely don't need to hear it on Thanksgiving. They also think it's been long enough and there isn't much more they could tell me.