Going to the psychologist this Tuesday: checklist for what to say...

[Lily04]

Hi guys,

 

So this is a really big step for me... after having an initial consultation (or meeting, whatever the term) last May, I have finally got a call for an opening to see a psychologist at my school (I could have gone sooner actually, but scheduling difficulties over the summer, etc.) In any case, I know some of you know my rantings/difficulties last year. Thus far this year I have been able to manage my life (school, work, family, etc.) better because of a more manageable workload, but I still feel generally stressed. And when I told my best friend that I was thinking of dropping the appointment altogether she said I shouldn't... because what if the same issues come back, and keep re-appearing? I should learn to deal with them at some point. So I thought that was a good point and decided to go.

 

That said, it has been hard for me to even get to this stage because I don't really know why I'm going. Everytime I think of what to say to the psychologist I draw a blank. So I'm going to create a mental checklist... of things I might bring up. I believe it's an hour appt. for now, but since I'm on the roster I could see him/her regularly in the future if need be I suppose.

 

If anyone has any suggestions/thoughts on this, perhaps because you know me/my posts, or have been to a psychologist before and can lend some insight that would be greatly appreciated as well.

 

Here are some potential issues:

 

- I have an obsessive compulsive disorder. I've had it since I was around 11/12 years old (trichotillomania -- pull out my hair.) At the beginning of the year, from Sept -- end of Oct. I was actually doing very well with this, I think a more manageable life really helped me deal with this and my hair started to grow, now shoulder-length. But I notice when I am depressed/stressed I really start to pull... I used to pull for no reason I have a better control and am more aware of that now. But I still pull and my hair has become thinner in the last 2 weeks... so this is a continuous issue. I am also not sure exactly why I pull, I think it may be biological (i.e. chemical imbalance, I am pretty sure it's this) but I don't want to take meds. So...I don't know. Maybe coping strategies? I don't have much hope for this, I realize that it's mostly self-cure at this point as doctors don't know what causes it and remedies aren't known.

 

- This leads to a greater issue: my anxiety. I do not have GAD (I don't believe) but I really feel a lot of anxiety in new situations. I also have a learning disability and apparently this contributes to it (one of the symptoms is extreme anxiety in novel situations..lol.) But I tend to feel things really deeply...I tend to overanalyze and that causes stress for me. Like today a small thing at work caused me to set my schedule back for 4 hrs. because I was deliberating how to problem-solve the situation and the emotional effects of it -- I felt really inadequate.

 

- This leads to another point: Feeling of inadequacy. Perhaps because of my perfectionism, but I have a really low self-esteem at times. I used to be overweight. Now I am actually underweight but I still feel like I should be better... I constantly question my abilities, my appearance, my attractiveness, and there's a history for why this is... teasing when I was younger, introversion, my learning disability and prejudice by teachers because of it when I was younger... but always feeling above-average in intelligence at the same time. Then when I was in high school, I was moved to an enriched program and I was *so* confused, I didn't even know I had a learning disability, so my grades were all over the place. I was winning achievement awards at a provincial level and then failing subjects others thought were so easy....but this still strikes me. I still fail assignments and have fortunately learned to deal with it and not get too down on myself... but then I always think: why is this? Is it me, my innate intelligence, or what are the contributing factors? Why do I respond in such a way, etc...

 

- Also, a practical problem: assignments take me forever. I am getting better at this but I can work for days on something and feel like I still don't know anything, I don't have the "true" understanding of something, I haven't come to the core of whatever I am studying. So I keep reading......for hours on end. It's like information overload. I don't sleep for days sometimes or eat. It's really not.. healthy. I hand in assignments months after the duedate because I feel I simply don't have enough information or enough perspective. I'm not sure if it's because I'm not processing the information correctly/analytically enough, BUT I have learned to deal with this better. But starting assignments is still SO difficult. I can stare at the screen for hours not knowing where to start, there's simply so many ideas......it seems so abstract but putting the abstract into a tangible form is so difficult for me. That's what it feels like.

 

These are just some issues that first come to mind... if anyone wants to comment or add something, that would be cool. Otherwise it's just a personal checklist for myself so I am a bit more organized instead of just splurting out my personal history or something lol...

 

Thanks,

 

Lily

[MacGyverRI]

Don't think about it too much since they know how to make you talk about what's bothering you.

[avman]

It is the psychologist's job to talk to you and get to the root of your problem. You don't have to worry about analyzing yourself to that level of detail. Just tell him/her what is bothering you and how things make you feel. A good psychologist will already have a way they feel works best for their patients.

[Lily04]

Thanks avman... well the first psychological I went to for the first session was completely useless so I guess I lost my faith in them to some extent lol...I had to analyze myself and she actually asked me "but you don't haev GAD right?" without even explaining what GAD was. I basically confirmed the result myself by saying no.

 

Not the greatest experience, she was a complete flake... i've had the same experience w/counsellors in the past. I need someone who is smart essentially...

[Juliana]

I think you're making the right decision. By all means, keep checking them out, until you find a good match. Finding a good shrink is almost like finding a good friend. They kind of need to "get you." But when they are good, the results are just unbelievable. Good luck.

[Lily04]

Hi,

 

Thank you so much for the encouraging words! I feel the same... it's all about rapport and want you want to get. My best friend goes to one and she actually likes her psychologist because she's not very emotional at all, but when she does smile it really means something. She just tells it like it is, is sorta strict and she says that that's what she really needs so it works.

 

I think I may need someone more emotional and understanding though... but someone who can also objectively see things and analyze situations intelligently. That combination is rare I think...

[MacGyverRI]

I think I may need someone more emotional and understanding though... but someone who can also objectively see things and analyze situations intelligently. That combination is rare I think...

 

Most are that way, unfortunately you got the 1% who weren't the 1st time around, keep an open mind and watch how fast you're laughing at where you are now.

[Lily04]

Hey,

 

Well we discussed quite a bit at my appointment... I think he's a very nice psychologist & quite competent as well. He also really boosted my self-esteem as I have always questioned my intelligence due to my tendency to not perform well on exams...and my learning disability. He said that he thinks I'm honestly very intelligent and he'd imagine would score above avg. on IQ tests.. so i found that interesting.

 

He essentially questioned the validity of the assessment results... he is questioning whether I even have an LD at all (although I know I do... but I am also quite sure that parts of the assessment were not correct) and I have a feeling he thinks I have mild ADD. I also have an OCD and he suggested medication for that, which I am still considering... we talked about my anxiety problems and a bit about my OCD as well.

 

I have an appt. for next Tuesday as well, so we'll see what happens. So far I am happy although I still feel a bit unsure about why I'm going there. I feel a bit insecure for it I think.. like I should be able to solve my own problems. But I don't know....it may be helpful. I'll give it a shot. Thanks guys,

 

Lily

[FoxLocke]

The best way to deal with a therapist is to be completely honest...AND spill your guts.

 

It worked for me!