How to show that im interested? (not too obviously though).

[SimpleGuy]

Over the last couple of weeks i have been taking an interest in a new girl who joined my course. She is attractive, smart and fun and this is what im attracted, mainly because i consider it too be the opposite of me which is normally what i go for, someone who will get me to do the things i wouldn't normally do (someone too push me).

 

I haven't had any dating experience and feel very much "out-of-the-know" on what to do and everything else that comes into this area. Approaching a girl that i like is worse, i have established a small friendship with her nothing much as i don't want too fall into the category of being "just friends" which has happened in the past. I'm an average looking guy (from what i consider) but girls have never really considered me as bf material and just desperate to break away from this. Attracting her, getting her interested in me is what im finding hard... i have no hobbies, no real interest other than what im currently studying which there is quite a bit too talk about but then again what too do afterwards when that dies. I have been trying to take an interest in what she likes, what her family does... haven't got much but i know a little... am i doing the right thing?

 

I'm sure she's twigging or has an inkling (knows that i'm interested in her) because when im not looking she's taking small looks and glances , im no expert but im assuming that this is a good sign? and I do that same. To be quite honest I don't know what to do next, im keeping my distance to not fall into the friend's part also I don't want to frighten her by being constantly around her so like I said im keeping my distance.

 

I just don't know what to do next, I have been thinking about asking her too coffee or something but im not sure, again finding the right day as im working when im not at University. Or do you think I should do something as a group, its very difficult to know. I really like this girl and would like to get closer to her, but its hard as I haven't had any dating experience or even have a girlfriend so this is new too me, I have asked girls out a couple of times but have been knocked back and as with anyone it does knock your self-esteem . We spend all day together 3 out of 7 days of the week at University on my course, she has a friend who hangs out with her who I also know, but she never seems to be alone. Im just not sure what to do next, its all very confusing… not new but then again I've never gotten anywhere so it is kind of always starting from the start.

 

Anyone have any advice they'd care too share on flirting and conversational tips, it would be appricated . A plan of action is what I need but then again if you did, what are the chances your going to end up following it

[dstanzler]

Group work is the ideal situation. At the university level its the best way to meet someone and talk to them outside of class. But, you are already chatting with this chick.

 

DO NOT go for the coffee date. You're going to need to show interest by touching her. If you don't want to do that then write her a poem or something. There are lots of obvious ways to demonstrate interest. Naturally, you could tell her you like her or ask her out on a date.

 

Flirt with her, draw on her, do whatever. If it makes you nervous keep going. The ladies love a flirt.

[Tigris]

Do you have her email address? It's a lot easier talking to someone over the net than it is in person. Once you get your confidence up it'll be easier to talk to her in person.

 

I agree with the touching her, e.g. instead of just saying 'hi' touch her arm and say hi, etc.

[Day_Walker]

You are gonna need some one on one time with her. Ask her out to get coffee, a pub or something else thats similiar that she likes. If she really has an interest in you then she wont put you in the friendzone, however if she is not that interested or has other guys in the picture thens he will be more inclined to put you in the friendzone.

[SimpleGuy]

Im really confused with the information given, one person says don't invite her for coffee an other does, and all im getting is short answers which doesn't really help me that much or maybe its me expecting something more. But as for being touchy-feely im not that kinda guy with a girl i don't really know, probably its just me again. I know that talking via internet is alot easier but it doesn't actually combat the issue of confidence when its in person that's the problem that's just finding an easy route and as i said doesn't solve/cure the problem.

 

Still no where closer to getting any more info as im now just confused even more.

[Kevin T]

Well, let me ask you: Why do you not want it to appear too obvious that you like her?

 

What's wrong with her knowing you are interested? (I'm not talking about desperate or pathetic, but geneuinely 'interested.')

[SimpleGuy]

To be honest i don't know, i've never had any luck with girls, never been on a date i know nothing of what too do. I don't know how to read signals, for all i know she could have given a million and i wouldn't of noticed. There's nothing wrong with her knowning its just me being parranoid, like i said i know nothing of this... im trying but im not getting anywhere at this rate im not gonna get any girl, none have taken any interest before, why should they now?

 

I suppose its easier me being negative of things because nothing posative ever happens. Im just really confused and i get to the point where i get tired and eventually do nothing.

[Dating Coach]

SimpleGuy, I really suggest that you read this thread, either from the beginning or at least starting from the position this link takes you...