Does she no like me anymore??

[bostonredsock5]

I've been going out with this girl since June, and the first 2 months were great we talked all the time told each other we loved each other. Then we had a fight mid August, and while the relationship is okay it isnt good or even great I dont think. We went days without talking and dont do anything toghther for weeks. We do live 80 miles apart, but still. She has told me the other day she loves me and I mean alot to her. However the past few days have made me question that. Her Grandmother passed away, and I told her I would be there for her, I sent her a sympathy card, as well as Flowers to the Funeral home. However she told me not to come to the wake or Funeral, but also said her sisters boyfriend was at the wake today. She also posted a bulletin on myspace telling everyone where and when the wake and Funeral were. People have told me this is not a good sign for me. Any thoughts on this would be a big help, thanks

[AngelEyez]

Hey Bostonredsocks,

 

The reason why she may not have wanted you to come to the wake or funeral is that it would cause her to be under more pressure or stress. The relationship is not going perfectly, but I doubt any relationship is perfect. What I mean is that, seeing you there may have caused her more pain inside. Not only has her grandmother died, but she also has to see and talk to you, which is why she may have mixed feelings about you. She probably does love you, but can't handle the issue of "you and her" at the moment.

 

AngelEyez

[friscodj]

Welcome to ENA bostonredsock5! Great to have you here! My uncle would love your username, he works for the Sox...

 

Yeah bro, something definitely sounds suspect in your post. You don't do anything together for weeks? And she is adament about not having you attend the funeral yet she posts it on her MySpace page? Yet she says she loves you??????

 

Read that again. And what would you tell your best friend if they were in this situation?

 

You have a couple of options here. You can leave this up to her and wait around or take charge of your own life here. First, figure out what you really want. Sit down and really look at this situation and your feelings. Why are you with her? In this fulfilling to you? What happened during the fight? What are some things you could do better?

 

Then I say give her some time to mourn her loss and then go down there and talk to her. You mention a fight in mid August. I would start there, lay everything out on the table and be ready for anything...good, bad, ugly, and especially be ready for her not to know what she wants. Or go down there to say goodbye depending on what you decide you really want. The established physical and emotional distance here makes it easier to walk away from this.

[TheRedQueen]

When my father died, I specifically asked my then boyfriend not to come. He did not know my father well and I felt that it would be inappropriate for him to be there. I take mourning very privately and personally, perhaps your girlfriend feels the same way, but in all fairness that wouldn't seem to be the case if she publicly notified others about her grandmother's funeral on her myspace page.

[Drunk]

I agree with redqueen, your girl just probably thought it wouldnt be right for you to be there. When my grandpa died, I asked my best friend to go to the funeral, but I did not want my boyfriend there. And it could possibly be that she has been really upset lately about her loved one passing away, so she hasnt been all excited to talk to people or to do things. My advice, help her cope with her loss, and console her while respecting her wishes (dont EVER get mad at her for not wanting you at the funeral, really bad move) When she gets over all this, then see how things are going in the relationship. But for now, just be the best guy in the world to her, that is what she wants, and things should get better. Good luck!!

[bostonredsock5]

Thanks for all the great advice everyone. My sister kind of said the same things as some of you, it would be weird to met most of her family at a Funeral. Also, i wasnt specific enough, we talked before but maybe once or twice a week, we didnt go out for weeks is what i meant to say. Im gonna wait til later next week and see how things rae i guess.

 

Also, while it may be corny we did exchange promise rings

 

Welcome to ENA bostonredsock5! Great to have you here! My uncle would love your username, he works for the Sox...

 

 

Thats awesome, too bad we had just a bad end to the season. Hopefully 07 will be better