stuck between 2 guys

[jrowland]

I have been going out with this guy for 3 years and we have been trying to buy a house together. I loved the idea at first but then this other guy that has been trying to go out with me for about 5 years came back around. He sends me flowers for my birthday and occasionally just to let me know he is thinking about me. We have always liked each other but our timing has always been bad as in one would be single the other would be in a relationship. Well, some things happened between me and this guy and now i have even stronger feelings for him than ever, but I am not sure if i want to break up with my bf for him. I am happier with this other guy because he treats me the way i should be treated but, 3 years is a long time and a lot of love developed between us and our families. I don't want to dump him and then regret it but i also feel as i am only 20 and i can be out there having fun and not tied down to either right now but maybe eventually start seeing this other guy because he likes to go to clubs and do things which my bf likes to sit at his house. I am so confused and i have little time because we got a loan for a house and we have 2 months now to find one. An idea of what to do would be greatly appreciated.

[crookster_man]

Well you have outlined a couple key points here, which I would like to focus on. Some times we get lost in the details and forget to think objectively about a salutation. Sometimes all we need is someone to offer a little clarity, this can help open our eyes to the bigger picture.

 

First you say that you are young and want to party still. This is completely natural, most young people (especially under 25) want to live a rather wild life. The idea of settling down to most people in this age bracket is not very common. People like to get out and experience the world. This is quite a common feeling. That being said, I want you to understand that this is just a feeling and not the only way to live your 20's. Far to often we follow our impulses and forget our obligations and the consequence of our actions. I guess this comes with experience, something most 20 year olds don't have. Either way, this is a valid question, which you should address.

 

Quite frankly you can experience life with a partner, nothing is holding you back. If you feel that your BF is to lazy or not outgoing enough why don't you take him out to do new things that will interest him. So that way you can both learn to do new things together. Just a thought.

 

Whatever you do will be up to you. Either way you will experience something new and grow from it. Don't regret your choices learn from them. Darn, I'm getting called off for work right now (at the office). I will post back with a few things else I want to mention.

[secret_agent_man]

Hello!

I think you should try to be honest here, to yourself and him. If you have doubts, or are unhappy... you should let him know now, before you end up in a house together and decide this later. Try to imagine the situation then, when it's well beyond the point it's at now.

 

Just be honest with him, and try not to turn it into an argument. Try to explain that you are telling him this for a good reason, and that you wouldn't want to get into this relationship further without clearing your own head first.

 

Good luck, we're here for you!

S.A.M.

[za3raa69]

well, u said it , ur only 20. ur supposed to be having fun and stuff, ur crrent bf likes sitting at home and u like clubbing like the other guy.

i say try takign time apart, see if u can actually break up and see if u actually wanna build a relationship with the other one.

or maybe u just wanna stay single for now

 

Goodluck! see ya!