1 Month NC and I broke it to with him Happy Birthday

[paulapalooza]

Ugh, I guess by with I mean wish...oops.

 

Well, I didn't think that I would do it, but after a month of not speaking, I sent him an email to wish him Happy Birthday.

 

I'm not sure how I feel about it. I was only trying to be nice. I've mentally prepared for him to not email me back at all.

 

Any thoughts?

[annie24]

well, whatever, don't stress. it's a nice thought, and if he doesn't reply, then that's all the more info that this man wasn't right for you.

 

it's not a big deal, just one birthday e-mail. just go back to your life now

[sparkle1]

Agree with Annie...

 

it was a nice thought. don't beat yourself up..

[NJRon]

It's fine to send out a happy birthday as long as you make sure you know that you may well get no response. Or, worse, some kind of strange response.

 

If he doesn't respond, then you did what anyone would do... a simple happy birthday wish

 

If he does, think very carefully before responding to it to further conversation.

[paulapalooza]

It's weird. I thought that I would totally be ok with it, but for some reason I have this hollow feeling in the pit of my stomach. It sort of feels like the nerves you get when you go for a job interview. I can't really explain it. Last night I was doing fine. I was enjoying my time alone and then I emailed him. It's kind of hard not to obsess.

[NJRon]

It's only hard not to obsess if you are obsessing

 

It just seems that you weren't quite ready. Just chalk it up and move on. You'll be ok. At least you didn't drunk-dial...

 

Hang in there

[annie24]

yeah, many worse things you could have done! it was a very nice thought, simple e-mail, now forget about it

 

you will be ok.

[paulapalooza]

I'm pretty sure that I'll be ok. I just more or less posted on here to vent. I wanted to make sure that I wasn't crazy or anything.

 

These last few weeks have been really good for me. The NC principle is totally one that every dumpee should live by. I've started to become more comfortable in my own skin, and I'm discovering all these guys that have apparently been waiting for me to dump my boyfriend (even though I was the dumpee). Who would have thought that there is life after relationships? I guess it just took about a month to realize it. I'm not completely over it, but I'm well on my way.

 

I guess emailing the ex was a first attempt at a friendship. Perhaps I wasn't ready. I don't even really care that he doesn't email me. In my head, I'm the bigger person for at least being polite. If he can't even send me acknowledgement that he received the email, then that's not my problem. He was never really good at emailing anyone anyway.

 

On the up side, at least I don't look like the crazy ex-girlfriend that keeps emailing and texting (and the like). To each his own. I'm going to have a blast being single.

 

Thanks to everyone who pitched on my sanity. You guys are the best!

[annie24]

I agree - i think what you did just shows that you were the bigger person by being polite, and no response from him means don't bother anymore! don't text him to wish him a happy turkey day or christmas.

 

there is a guy out there who is looking for a great girl like you, so get to healing so you can meet him!

[paulapalooza]

Annie, I'm not sure if anyone told you this lately, but you're seriously the coolest thing to happen on this planet. I don't know you personally, (other than this forum of course) but you've helped me get through most of this garbage than a lot of my friends have. I hope no one ever tells you any different. You're the coolest.

 

The more and more I look at my past relationship with me ex, the more I realize that we just weren't a great fit. I'm ok with that now. I know that I'm not a bad person, and neither was he. We just weren't great for each other. Oh well. The next one might be better.

 

Ahhh it's so liberating when you feel this way. Two weeks ago, I never thought that this would be possible. It's awesome.