Bipolar Disorder

[Acer]

Well, to start with, a lot of people from my mother's family, suffers from mental illness - nervous breakdowns, depression, etc - with a lot of suicidal attempts and things like that.

 

Anyways, since I was a kid I felt that there must be something wrong with me. I wanted to know what the hell was my problem. First, I thought I was a depressive person, but that couldn't be, because as I could be depressed one day, and staying in bed, the other day I could wake up very happy.

 

Well, I think I have bipolar disorder. I know, I know... We shouldn't label ourselves, but I did a lot of research on this, and everything checks.

 

The mood swings... Depressed one day, euforic the other. It sucks sometimes. I remember when a friend of mine got dumped by his girlfriend, and all I did was laughing at him because he was such a wimp. =/ And a lot of weird episodes too.

 

I'm *pretty sure* I have bipolar disorder. Example: Yesterday I wake in bad mood, in the afternoon I felt great, and by the evening I felt like punching my dad for telling me jokes. I tried to laugh at them, though.

 

Well, I don't want to be like my mom, always controlled by her meds. I think it's awful to live like that. I think it would be nice to go to a psychologist and, well, talk, but I ever said to my parents I wanted to visit a psychologist they would just go 'What the hell are you saying?'.

 

It's tough. One day I wake up, and it's like Life's great. The other day, Life sucks, with no apparent reason. I feel great for losing one of the more important person in my life in one day, and the other I feel capable of crying all day and blame myself.

 

Well, I tried everything with Self-Help in it, and I'm quite proud to admit that I've had some results in improving my life and my overall happiness.

 

But no matter what I do, I can't avoid this 'mood swinging' or whatever.

 

I guess I don't have a specific question, but I guess I would like to hear from people who have some experience with this kind of things.

[Closure]

From my experience if you aren't a doctor you can't self diagnose.

[Acer]

From my experience if you aren't a doctor you can't self diagnose.

 

Yes, but believe me, I looked everywhere. Encyclopedias, books, Internet... I did little 'self-diagnose' quizzes. It can't be just a coincidence that I present more than 80% of all the symptoms.

[Closure]

I appreciate that, however I wouldn't ask a Baker to fix my car, if you know what I mean.....

 

You need to see a Doctor and if he agree's there is medication to stablise yourself.

 

Yes, but believe me, I looked everywhere. Encyclopedias, books, Internet... I did little 'self-diagnose' quizzes. It can't be just a coincidence that I present more than 80% of all the symptoms.

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

I mainly object to your diagnosis on the following grounds:

 

Bipolar Disorder is characterised by episodes much, much longer than a few hours.

 

To gain this diagnosis, you must have had an episode, EITHER depressed OR manic OR a *very* clearly mixed up state which has lasted at least a week. I may have gotten those specific details wrong, but:

 

It's *incredibly* rare to be geuninely bipolar and change within hours.

 

I don't mean to disrespect you, and by all means you may well have a psychiatric illness- but as someone who has been diagnosed professionally after hours of assessment and lived with it for around 4 years now...what you describe doesn't sound like it to me.

 

It sounds more like an offshoot of depression or another emotional disorder.

 

My advice would be to get yourself to a qualified shrink as soon as possible.

[Acer]

I mainly object to your diagnosis on the following grounds:

 

Bipolar Disorder is characterised by episodes much, much longer than a few hours.

 

To gain this diagnosis, you must have had an episode, EITHER depressed OR manic OR a *very* clearly mixed up state which has lasted at least a week. I may have gotten those specific details wrong, but:

 

It's *incredibly* rare to be geuninely bipolar and change within hours.

 

I don't mean to disrespect you, and by all means you may well have a psychiatric illness- but as someone who has been diagnosed professionally after hours of assessment and lived with it for around 4 years now...what you describe doesn't sound like it to me.

 

It sounds more like an offshoot of depression or another emotional disorder.

 

My advice would be to get yourself to a qualified shrink as soon as possible.

 

 

Yes, you may be right, of course. After all, I'm not a doctor at all.

 

To tell you the truth, I can't hold on being depressed or sad for too long. When I was 14 or so, I remember being mildly depressed for some weeks. I never thought of suicide in a way 'I'm going to do it', but at that time I just wandered around with the 'World sucks' feel, not talking to a living soul. My friends ditched me.

 

But asides from that, I can't really be depressed for too long (or atleast this is what I can remember right now). I know that I may be sad all day, but, just like a glimpse, I can act like a lunatic, jumping around, singing and screaming like I've won the lottery.

 

Well, to be honest, I enjoy being maniac or whatever. The feel is just awesome, just like I can go out and be whatever - a Karate Champion, a best-seller writer, whatever. But when I'm depressed, I really just want to re-assure that feeling, just like a 'normal' depressed person.

 

Right now, I can't stand my always happy father, but I know that in a few hours I may be as well joining the fun with him.

 

One thing that scares me is that I just don't know 'who I am'. I'm happy, I'm sad, I'm mad. Since I was younger, I would try to define my personality copycatying whoever I liked, be it a TV star or whatever. It's just like in one day I'm one person, and the next I'm other.

 

EDIT: I'm just 16, so perhaps the fast mood swings relate to my age.

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

You are only 16?!?! Crikey, I can almost promise you on what you've said that you are just experiencing a rocky adolescence. Do NOT worry about it, I doubt you are one of the, ummm *cough* Lucky Bipolar People.

 

My depressions lasted weeks. I wouldn't get out of bed for days.

 

My manic phase (main one) lasted about 3+ months. I thought I was IT. I was amazing, I thought. I wanted to buy everything, have sex with everyone. I stayed up all night, I drank too much, I had a stupid number of relationships.

 

And when I crashed, I was about a week off killing myself before I was given an emergency psych. appointment...the rest is history.

 

I wish you very much luck. You sound a rather nice person.

[Acer]

Thanks for your words. And I'm sorry for your past. You had it WAY worst than me.

 

Probably (and I hope so) you're right and I'm just having a rocky adolescence. I guess the thing that put me on the seach was my family history. My mom's family is all messed up.

 

She has to be always on the meds, or else she'll go to an extreme state of anger and then depressed to bed. A sister of her with schizophrenia, another one that tried suicide once although I don't think she's on meds right now (and she's doing great). There other two that I don't know very well, but I know that one of them is on the meds as well. Her father (my grandparent) has some disease as well, but I don't know if he's taking any med.

 

Anyways, all the problems they had could be due to genetics or just bad childhood. My grandparent beated his wife, his children. Bad stuff. Had sex with one of my aunts, broke the leg to other, let one die and so on and on. He tried suicide too - at least one time.

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

Know where you are coming from! My grandmother was a major depressive/alcoholic who was hospitalised, etc. and my cousin's tried to kill himself 3 times and is paralysed now because he didn't succeed. My dad's dad is married to my mom's mom (Yep. AFTER my parents married though, obviously) and that causes tensions sometimes.

 

Life's never perfect, just keep on goin'. Here whenever for talking.

[CarnelianButterfly]

I'm a rapid cycling bipolar, unlike regular bipolar, my mood shifts are over a period of days instead of weeks or I can have long manic phases because only my depression is treated. This is a diagnosis of a shrink, I saw one after feeling suicidal due to a long depressed period.

 

You should see a doctor and get help.

[justanurse]

You should see a psychiatrist. It is actually not that uncommon to have bipolar-mixed type. This means that the ups and downs can switch not only day to day, but many times throughout a day. If there is a family history of bipolar, that makes it even more likely that you may also have it. But see a doc!

[Newo Ikkin]

My boyfriend was diagnosed with Bipolar at 12/13. You have signs of it, but its best to share your concerns with a professional before worrying yourself. Hope it goes well for you x

[rikka]

I'm a rapid cycling bipolar, unlike regular bipolar, my mood shifts are over a period of days instead of weeks or I can have long manic phases because only my depression is treated. This is a diagnosis of a shrink, I saw one after feeling suicidal due to a long depressed period.

 

You should see a doctor and get help.

 

I have rapid cycling type II as well, so I hear ya. It is important to remember that mental illnesses manifest differently in different people, and only a qualified psychiatrist can diagnose you. Secondly, bipolar disorder is a medical condition. It cannot be cured, but it can be stablized through many methods, but medication is pretty much required.

 

Family history plays a big role in bipolar disorder. I can't remember the stats, but I know my doctor was very shocked to find out that there is no history of mental illness in my family. Like the others who have posted here, I recommend sharing your concerns with a professional. It won't hurt anything, and it may save you a lot of trouble.

[numbly_hypersensitive]

It's not *incredibly* rare to have mood swings like that over a period of hours. In fact, the clinical term is rapid cycling. Major mood shifts over a period of day or just hours. I have them both. Even on meds. Matter fact, I just went off my meds cuz I was in a terminal state of crap. "Bad move" everyone tells me in the BiPolar Chat room.

 

Check out that forum. It may help. As for your youth, BiPolar usually presents in early twenties. Is that because once you leave the nest you have an opportunity to treat yourself? Or is it because the teen years just feel like BiPolar and really aren't? The only way to know for sure is to get on with a doc and try some meds. If they work, great. If not, you're just a teen with those wacky feelings. ***Drawback- meds have been shown to mess up teens to the point of suicide. ***

 

More than anything, stay connected and reach out like you are doing. Somehow, just expressing my feelings helps me feel better. Knowing people in the world can relate and that I'm not some freak helps immensly. (sp)

 

Good luck and keep posting!

[numbly_hypersensitive]

Hi. Just to let you know I'm not crazy (lol). The forum I was talking about is at link removed.

[rikka]

numbly_hypersensitive, You say that is a good forum? I have been looking for some "support group". Unfortunately our city doesn't have much in the way of actual support ( i got to be in a 6 week group session... it was GREAT!!), so I have been looking for something online to just share and vent with those who know what it is like. I think I will have to check it out!

 

It's not *incredibly* rare to have mood swings like that over a period of hours.

As a matter of fact, during my 'diagnostic interview' (my first session with the psychiatrist) she mentioned that the (paraphrased) "range of emotions and moods" I demonstrated in our 90 minute meeting pretty much left her in no doubt of my diagnosis. I would swing from total hysterics to deadpan to extreme elation in minutes let alone hours/days/weeks.

 

It is a fascinating disorder if nothing else

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

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