Girlfriend just broke up with me

[mark532000]

I have been dating a girl for over one and half years in a long distance relationship. Everything was going well, we were really into each other and had some serious plans to get married one day. Well it seems that her parents or members of her family thought that she could do better. They would prefer to see her with someone that has a higher level of education like a doctor (I am a universtiy graduate and a real estate appraiser). She tried to fight them on the issue for a very long time. But as we were getting closer to my move date to her city she has now told me that the pressure on her is unberable and that she needs some time on her own to figure it out.

 

She admits that she is very easily affected by what members of her family say to her and she says that she respects them to much to go against their wishes. I'm devestated and really need to hear some advice on what I should do and how to handle this.

 

Thanks

[NJRon]

Welcome to ENA and sorry to hear your pain. In my mind, something I look for in a partner is someone that can stand up for themselves and make their own decisions. If she isn't acting that way, then who is to say if, even you two did stay together, that her family wouldn't be driving her to do all sorts of things.

 

I'm always sad when I see someone succumb to the influence of another in making the choices they need to make *for their own life*. But, there is not much in your control. If she's taking time out right now, then best to start healing yourself. Maybe she will come around, but you'll be in a much better place if she does by moving on.

 

I hope you feel better.

[southerngirl]

How old is she?

 

You have a respectable level of education and a respectable career!

 

Im sorry your going through this. Sounds like maybe her family is controlling or shes using that as an excuse.

[mark532000]

How old is she?

 

You have a respectable level of education and a respectable career!

 

Im sorry your going through this. Sounds like maybe her family is controlling or shes using that as an excuse.

 

 

She's 26 and a pharmacist. good advice so far guys, thanks

[mark532000]

That's a good point and I asked her if there was any other reasons why she was doing it. She said no, that I have been the best thing in her life and that she loved me very much but didn't want to put me through the issues that would come with her family's disapproval.

[NJRon]

Actually.. given that... you aren't the best thing in her life.. her family is. When you are entering a life-time, loving partnership, there is no reason to play second-fiddle anymore. Give yourself the opportunity to be #1.. not #2.

[mark532000]

You know the more I think about it the more I'm getting pissed about the situation. Maybe this is the best thing to happen becuase if it doesn't work out at least I'll know now and can move on. If it does work out then I'm going to set some conditions in order to avoid this type of situation again.

 

But still what a bunch of * * * * this is.