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My ex still isn't happy.....


pdhcentral
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Hi,

 

I'll try to keep it simple and small.

 

Ok, I was dating a girl for about a year, while she was having huge relationship problems with her other. She has 3 kids, so moving wasn't going to be easy. I knew that she prepared a wedding, but I stayed with her until it was no longer a chose either of us could make to stop seeing each other.

 

2 weeks ago, she did get married and she went on holiday. I spoke to her yesterday and she had some shocking news for me. She had become pregnant with the guy she just married and to top it, she was still not happy being at home, mainly because no-one there seems to really care for her. She stayed at her mums.

 

I've told her to stay there for the time being. The thing is….. what can I do for her. I still love her and hate seeing her in this state. I know she's married now, but to me that doesn't affect how I feel, but I know she loves the guy that she married, but I'm not sure of his love for her, as he doesn't seem to care about her enough. She went to her mums because of high blood pressure, but she'll go back to her home as she thinks its best for the kids.

 

What do I say to her. I just want her to be happy. If I had my way, we would get a house together, which I've suggested before, and that would be that.

 

Thanks for any advice you can give, much appreciated.

 

Phill.

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Yeah, I second what NJRon said. She had free will and could have called the wedding off if she had wanted to.

 

Sounds like someone who might consider herself victimized a lot. Not to be harsh, but you should turn around and walk away. If she takes it upon herself to get a divorce and come find you, fine. Maybe you will still be available and interested, or maybe you won't.

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You have set yourself up to get emotionally slapped. Think about it, if she was really serious about either one of you, why would she keep the other guy around? Going into this situation you should've known that her having another man in her life precludes anything serious and basically amounts only to some fun, but now you're heart is involved and that makes for a dangerous situation for you when she eventually dumps you.

 

So do this, it's either gonna come down to him or you and it's up to you to make her decide. If she's not willing tomake the jump to you, then it's time to cut this off as you would only be fooling yourself into thinking she will find her way into your arms on her own.

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Thanks for your responses. I think this ones dead in the water then eh.......

 

She's supposed to be coming through this week, not sure if she will, last week was the first time we've spoke for about 4 months. She's very self confident and it very nervous sometimes. She's knows how I feel and I've already said if she comes through to see me, it'll be talking only and nothing else, I'm not going to go there, if you get my meaning........

 

Thanks again.

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