post abortion grief

[heidiheels]

Hey,

i'm not sure if this is the right forum for this...

basically, last month i had an abortion. Although i coped with things at the time, recently ive been feeling really sad about everything.

 

I cry myself to sleep at night thinking about things.

Its uncontrollable. I could be doing something so mundane as making lunch and ill just start crying; its overwhelming and theres no warning of it.

 

thing is, theres no on i can really talk to about it; i live at home and i didnt tell my mum, i didnt tell my boyfriend either.

 

i just feel really lost at the moment, a complete emotional wreck.

 

just wondering if this is normal?

x

[RayKay]

It's very normal, especially if you were not really READY or wanting to make that decision, or felt pressured too. And, because you have no one to talk to it is only compounding it.

 

I am very confused as to why you did not tell your boyfriend, whom I assume was the father?

 

I would suggest you call the clinic you went to, and ask them for a referal to grief counselling, they definitely will have resources they can recommend.

[AdriSnow]

wow, tell your boyfriend so he can hold you. Just explain to him why you had to do it through he is bound to be mad. Im sorry. I wish I knew you I would help you through it. So, there must be a friend of your you can tell??

[justpaisley]

Here is a website for women in grief after an abortion:

 

link removed

 

They also have a message board.

[BornToResist]

Aw honey, I'm so sorry!

 

I haven't had one, but I have done extensive research and it sounds like this happens to a lot of girls, even if they realize they made the right choice.

 

It might help you out a lot more if you confided in someone. Let yourself heal, you know? Why didn't you tell your boyfriend? Do you feel you can't tell your mom? I have no idea what your situation is, but sometimes those around us that care about us are a lot more understanding than we thought they would be.

 

There's lots of places like Planned Parenthoods or probably the place you had it done at that do post abortion counseling. If not, I'm sure they can refer you to a place that does.

 

You can always come here and talk about it too.

 

I'm so sorry for your pain.

[avman]

It's very normal. That's a rough thing to go through and of course you'll have feelings about it for quite some time.

 

Is there a counselor that you can go see to talk about things? They are required to keep it confidential. I think it is important to really get your feelings out so they don't eat away at you.

[heidiheels]

.

 

I am very confused as to why you did not tell your boyfriend, whom I assume was the father?

.

 

yes he was, but we split up. i didnt really think it was fair to put all that on him. plus he doesnt take bad news well if u know what i mean.

 

my best friend knows, shes the only one. but she lives with her boyfriend now and she hasnt really got any free time; i dont want to burden her with it.. i guess im just not good at asking for help!

[brownie]

Im sorry to hear that your hurt so bad, I havent gone throught that my self but I can only imange how you feel.

 

there are many places where you can go get help, depeding on what state you live there are state agencys and religious clinics that have both couselors and phychologist on hand. Its very normal whats happening to you, but the good thing is that there is help out there light at the end of this dark tunnel.

 

please dont feel like you would burnden anyone with your feelings, sometimes all we need is someone to hug us and tell us is ok. this forum is full of caring people that truly care and listen.

 

I hope you feel better and look into getting some counselor help.

 

** Hugs**

[southerngirl]

Im so sorry your feeling this way. It does get better. You just have to tell yourself that what you did was for the best.

 

Remind yourself of why you did it. Stay busy. STart a new hobby. Dont sit and think about it, try to push it out of your mind.

 

Like the others have suggested you can call the clinic you went to they may have someone to recommnend for you to talk to.

 

I dont know what your reasons were for doing this hon but Im sure you thought this out and have your own story, your own reason why this was the right thing for you to do. It is normal to grieve the loss. Allow yourself to feel it, move through it.

 

My thoughts are with you.

[caring person]

This is the best post abortive counseling ever: Project Rachel, check it out on the internet or call for an 800 number. They can help you.

Take care and God bless you,