Happiness takes work...

[lady00]

I'm discovering more and more as I get older that happiness is not a passive state of being. It really is something that needs to be worked on. I've found that I have to continually reaffirm my happiness and think positively about myself and my life in order to be happy. It's all too easy to give into negative thoughts and feelings about one's self. Happiness, especially after a breakup, takes work. For me, it's not a state that I can just achieve and then feel like I have arrived and don't need to think about it anymore. It's something that I work on daily, something that I feel it's important to put serious effort into. Let's face it, lots of things in life can be a drag...there are tons of things out there that negatively affect self esteem and that wear on our happiness.

 

Something else that I've found useful in getting over a breakup...faking it. Yup, faking being happy. I've found that when I feel down about a breakup, I try to put a smile on my face. And most of the time...it actually affects the way I really feel...it actually makes me feel a little better. Anyway, just sharing some thoughts...

[Scout]

What wise, wise words. And I really needed to hear them to reaffirm my own blessings! Thanks so much for sharing.

 

It's true, everyone should make a point of giving thanks every day for what they do have. Just do it. It will soon become a habit that will transform you into a productive, thankful person.

 

Just some of mine include: two dogs I love so much, a supportive network of people who truly care about my wellbeing - both family and friends, Internet and "real world," the physical health to live independently, and a business that, if not making me rich yet, allows me to keep a snug roof over my head and food in the fridge. I did not always have these things, and I don't want to ever take them for granted, even in times when I'm emotionally suffering a bit.

 

Thank you again, Lady00, for the reminder!

[sidehop]

Good topic.

 

For me lately, it's seeing people around me who's experience death within the families & friends which brings sadness but also the appreciation of what you have now & constantly reminding myself how SHORT life is.

 

My co-worker that sits next to me just lost her long time friend who died of brain aneurysm & was only in her early 30's. I thought this could happen to anyone including myself and again, felt so guilty of being selfish and wanting more then what I could afford sometimes.

[Fisch]

I definitely agree that after a breakup staying happy is work. It is almost like a chore getting rid of the residual emotions of sadness. I have to have a meaningful conversation with someone, post something or read something that hits it at the heart here, or listen to some music read something e.t.c. Its feels like a chore as if I am brushing my teeth or something. As I get older I agree that it is something you should stay conscious of and work towards but for me it is not difficult to keep a positive outlook most of the time.

[The Vitruvian Man]

Something else that I've found useful in getting over a breakup...faking it. Yup, faking being happy. I've found that when I feel down about a breakup, I try to put a smile on my face. And most of the time...it actually affects the way I really feel...it actually makes me feel a little better. Anyway, just sharing some thoughts...

 

I find this helpful, too. The physical act of smiling triggers the feelings associated with happiness.

 

Thanks for sharing.

[Rainz]

I'm discovering more and more as I get older that happiness is not a passive state of being. It really is something that needs to be worked on. I've found that I have to continually reaffirm my happiness and think positively about myself and my life in order to be happy. It's all too easy to give into negative thoughts and feelings about one's self. Happiness, especially after a breakup, takes work. For me, it's not a state that I can just achieve and then feel like I have arrived and don't need to think about it anymore. It's something that I work on daily, something that I feel it's important to put serious effort into. Let's face it, lots of things in life can be a drag...there are tons of things out there that negatively affect self esteem and that wear on our happiness.

 

I can so relate to this......I really, reallly can. This really resonated with me.

[Serena68]

Thanks for posting this. It is so true. I try to smile a lot more..even if i don't feel like it. And people tell me that I have a very pretty smile and I should smile more often