"its me again with an addition problem"

[Rylies Mommy]

Well. Many of you know me from the topic "i made a mistake and I'm strong enough to be open" Thank you all for your suppot and its really gotten me through a lot of everything. Thank you guys. But on to my problem:

 

So you know my mistake...well its led to another.... Come wednesday I will know for a fact.. but I am almost possitive I am pregnant. and I am almost possitive its not my husbands. And whats scary is my husband is completely calm about it. If I am pregnant he said "you call the other guy and let him know and we will see what he says" But well to be honest I really dont knwo what the guy will say... we were pretty close just friends too and he loves the kids he has now.... well the lil girl that he knows for a fact that its his any way. But I am kinda worried about him wanting to be apart of this kids life.... I know he should be but I dont knwo it seems weird. My husband is fine with it actually he said we will get a DNA test and sue for child custody but I am so not a fighter. I dont want to do that ya know. Just seems wrong the kid has... well come to think of it he really isnt the good father figure (this other guy) so maybe i should fight im to sign over his rights? or hell i really dont know.... could some one help me? or jsut talk with me any thing my sn on AIM is : o2o2o5dmk and my yahoo is xxfaeriefrenzyxx i dont know... jsut please...

[arco_GA]

go to church. is this what you expected to happen when you were young and thinkng about your future?

[melrich]

What a mess. Why are you so sure it is the other guys?

[theantibarbie23]

I hate to say this but maybe it would be best if you didn't confront this guy about the pregnancy at all because if he decides to be in this child's life there really is nothing the two of you could do about it, unless he is proven to be unfit.

 

The courts would not force the birth father to give up his rights, just because of the way in which the child was concieved. Custody battles are extremely expensive and can be drawn out for a long, long, time.

 

Try not to fool yourself into thinking your husband is ok with all of this just because of the way he is acting now. This is still a very fresh wound to this man. It doesn't sound like the shock has worn off yet.

 

If this guy does find out about this child and becomes a part of her life, it can easily be the catalyst of the destruction of your marriage. Get into Marriage Counselling now so that the two of you can stand with a united front and be better prepared to deal with the possiblity of this man being a part of both of your lives for years to come. Also, Marriage counselling will help you both cope when his anger stage finally hits.

 

You are very lucky woman to have a husband is willing to try and heal this relationship under these circumstances. I know mine would be gone in a nanosecond.

[lozic21]

Why oh why, oh why, would you have an affair and not use a condom??? Youre husband must be a REALLY understanding guy...

[Bethany]

First things first. Get that test done. Almost positive is not good enough. You need to know 100% before any other decision is made.

[Rylies Mommy]

I am pregnant.... Its for sure now. And the reason I am most sure that its not my husbands is because my husband and I used a condom the last time. The reason a condom wasnt used the time with the other guy is we were so drunk and to be honest I dont rememebr much of anything. Now... antibarbie, I thanky ou for your words and you are right.. I have come to the ecision to not tell the other guy at all. It would be ebst I think and am going to try and just move on... as far as my husband and I are concerned its "our' baby and our daughter will be a big sister. Now...monday we will know if we are good for the counseling to go. And then we will get there... we are going to have to really go through counseling for all of us. Thanx for your support