Cutting but dont feel as bad as my friends do...

[emmie]

Hi all

I came accross the site looking for some peace of mind I suppose. I cut my arms - mainly when the stress or worry builds up inside so much that I need some kind of release. I told a friend of mine and she completely freaked out. I dont see it as that much of a problem as it stops me doing anything worse. also I drink to excess when I start drinking and my friend said that was part of it too. I dont see anything too bad in it because once its done im fine. what are your thoughts on this and am I just denying the real problems?? thanks.

 

Em

[theproman23]

I would have to say either one of those, cutting or drinking in excess are something you should aviod no matter what. You might not see cutting and drinking as big problems only because they're preventing you from doing anything else worse but you have to realize that those two things in itself are unhealthy and something you should seek treatment for.

 

I suggest you seek professional help and try and talk to someone about this. Cutting your arms is something I would take very very seriously.

 

Please refrain from hurting yourself and when you feel the need to call someone and talk it out or post here or the best solution seek professional treatment for what is causing you to do this.

[emmie]

thank you for the response, I know you are right, but I dont talk to my family much, I dont have that many close friends - and definitely none I could talk to about this.. the one I did talk to went mad!! My mum works at the local doctors so I cant go there.. Its not that bad yet, I can normally pass the marks off as getting caught in holly bushes or my cats etc... I know its not right but things build up so much it really helps and then im fine again.

 

I definitely should stop I think but its not as bad as many I have read about. Ive been trying not to go out recently so I dont have loads of alcohol but now people are moaning at me for being unsociable - cant win!!!

[EmptySoul]

As a cutter I say that if you want to cut, it's your choice. I'm warning you though, it can easily/quickly become an addiction.

 

As far as not going out, and people giving you crap about it, if you want to get anywhere you have to be strong enough to do what you need to do, and not worry about what everyone else is saying.

 

-E.

[emmie]

thanks - dont know how to differentiate tho - its something that builds up and happens before I know it. I do it at home and no one knows so it doesnt hurt anyone. If I admit it then people will just worry etc..

 

i did 4 cuts tonight and now I feel fine. no one will know. I dont mean to cut and I dont chose to but it just takes over and I have to do it

[nottoogreen]

Hi Emmie,

 

Welcome to eNotAlone!

 

Cutting can be compulsory like many things. Note that compulsory behavior is independent of addiction. For example I am an ex-smoker but from time to time look for cigarettes after a meal, more so than at other times. Alcohol makes me "look" more too. Craving due to past addicten gets less and less.

 

Thus when one experiences a "trigger", one does something. This is because our mind adapts to what we do often. It un-adapts too, but it takes time.

 

If you want to stop cutting, you have to look for the trigger, and backward all the way to when you started and further backward to your earliest memories of what made you unhappy. There is no oneday fix. Support to help you deal with your worries will help you to eventually get over it - as long as you really want.

 

Two things I can tell you right now which may cut your worries about in half:

All you can be is a loving healthy friend to your to your loving healthy friend.

and

You deserve to be understood, but to expect understanding is very foolish.

 

Some questions.

 

What age have you started cutting?

 

You say that you are not close with your family, why is that?

 

Do you have a partner in your life and if so how are you doing together?

 

Do you have any history of abuse and ridicule?

 

Whenever you are ready please talk, Talk as much as you like, about all that you miss in your life, what hurt you, what made you angry, what you worry. We are here to listen.

[Ms. Babydoll]

I think instead of releasing yourself in negative actions like drinking or cutting try to find a positive way to release yourself, like painting, writing poetry or join a club of some sort, cutting can become an addiction and addictions can become serious