Should I feel bad?

[wonderwal]

So a few of us went to a strip club. This one guy took his girlfriend along.

 

So I'm talking to his girlfriend, he's not around. I've met her a few times, but this was the first time that I spoke to her properly and got to know her. We go to look for him, and he's talking to a few strippers. We go sit next to him and his friends... next thing the one stripper starts giving him and some other guys a lapdance. His girlfriend told me she was going to cry, was feeling sick, and wanted to go somewhere else.. she probably felt like she was being cheated on. So I told her to tell her boyfriend, I mean he was sitting next to her. Then the stripper gives her a lapdance. I could see she was totally grossed out. She told me again she felt sick and wanted to leave. I then got a lapdance. A few minutes later, she bursts into tears, gets up and leaves.

 

Should I feel bad that I didn't leave and comfort her? I knew she wasn't coping well with the situation and was hurt. But either I could have sat there and had fun with friends, or gone to comfort some girl whose boyfriend was right there. I felt like it wasn't my duty to help her. However I was the only one who knew how she felt, but even so, she's 20 years old, and if she didn't want a stripper rubbing herself on her, she could have stopped it.

 

So did I act incorrectly, or am I just worrying for nothing?

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

Well I think it's up to her to decide if the situation she's in meets her standards.

 

For instance, I personally wouldn't have gone there with my boyfriend in the first place. And also, I wouldn't want a boyfriend who wanted to go to a place like that. So I maintain my own standards and refuse to tolerate or accept things that I don't wish to.

 

I think if she is that unhappy with the situation, she should tell her boyfriend. If he refuses to alter his behavior in a way that is acceptable to her, the she should dump him, and keep her options open for a man who's behavior and interests are more acceptable to her.

[Ians Mommy]

At most "legal" strip clubs, there are no actually sexual activities happening other than lap dances which I don't consider cheating. Every woman has their on views on what is cheating and what isn't but I wouldn't even worry about my fiance going to a strip club. Hell, if I was old enough, I'd be going with him and enjoying myself too.

[valenski]

Should you feel guilty because she feels as if her boyfriend is cheating? Thats a tough one, you could have been the gentleman and escorted the young lady home or just have fun like everyone else. The fact you are feeling guilty should tell you something about yourself, I could tell you what I would do in your situation but thats what I'd do.

 

Hey Ians Mommy can I have your number I think you'd be fun to hang out with.LOL

[Mr Mister1]

I'd think her bf should have noticed that she ran out crying and gone after her, it would have been pretty noticeable that she ran out wouldn't it?

 

Still why'd she go along? What was she expecting to happen? If you go to a strip club that's the sort of thing that's going to happen! Seems a strange thing to want to do.

[Tigris]

It should've been her boyfriend that went after her not you. The best thing to do would've been tell him she was upset and she left.

 

Don't worry about what happened. We all think better in hindsight.

[Celadon]

So you're considerate of the girl, and her bf's not. I admire your instinct and manners. His leave a lot to be desired. Yes, it would've been kind of you to help her out, especially since he seems clueless and she mistakenly put herself in a bad situation ... but I don't think you HAD to rescue her. It was completely your call, based on how you felt at the time.

 

Sometimes these kinds of incidents catch us off guard. If anything, I'd suggest you decide for yourself what you'd do if a similar type of situation came up again. Then you can jump into action without having to think so much.