My BF's issues

[serenity85]

So i recently got with my bf and hes such a great guy except theres a few things we need to work on and i need some advice onn how to approach this

 

A)He is a Type A diabetic meanin he takes injections but the problem is his diet is terrible and he drinks alchohol which is no good but iv told him to stop but he feels like im stoppin him from havin fun but im not im just worried about his health we have sat down and spoke about it so much and he says he wont but he still does everytime he goes to a party or something - he is 21 and im 20

 

B)I recently discovered he is dislexic and i dont know how to approach the issue without offending him, hes having a lot of trouble trying to get a job because of this and acts like its not even a problem when it really does effect him, i want him to get help but how am i meant to go about this when he doesnt want to help himself.

 

 

Thanks xxx

[sumguy]

Welcome to eNotalone =)

 

In either case I'd suggest telling him how worried you are about these conditions, maybe even rope in your local doctor in the case of diabeties, most people who have Type A don't take it seriously, and don't realise the consequences it can have on them.

 

With the Dyslexia, well, the only thing that can have an impact on that are those tinted glasses. But I'd say the same thing, just tell him you're worried about the affect it has on him, and that you want to help.

 

Hope this helps =)

[serenity85]

Welcome to eNotalone =)

 

In either case I'd suggest telling him how worried you are about these conditions, maybe even rope in your local doctor in the case of diabeties, most people who have Type A don't take it seriously, and don't realise the consequences it can have on them.

 

With the Dyslexia, well, the only thing that can have an impact on that are those tinted glasses. But I'd say the same thing, just tell him you're worried about the affect it has on him, and that you want to help.

 

Hope this helps =)

 

 

with the diabetes i think i will rop in my local doc thankss

 

and the dyslexia is very sensetive im scared to approach it cos i dnt wanna loose him and u know what men and their pride are like

[sumguy]

and the dyslexia is very sensetive im scared to approach it cos i dnt wanna loose him and u know what men and their pride are like

You wound my gender ;_;

 

I take it this was only recently diagnosed - or it would have been treated earlier in life. Maybe you could approach it more subtley... Some of the greatest people in the world have Dyslexia. Richard Branson, for example, has a severe case of Dyslexia, and yet he runs the multi-million dollar Virgin enterprise, if he is as proud as you said, approaching it from the right angle might make confronting it seem like the thing to do.

[RayKay]

Honestly, I think these are things your boyfriend has to want to work on himself, or to deal with. You can be supportive him, but you cannot change him - that means you cannot nag him or expect him to change when he is not ready too.

 

You have to either accept him for whom he is and realize if he wants to fix it, he will, if he doesn't, he won't.

 

Dyslexia is tricky - there are tricks and ways you can learn to minimize it or work with it, but it takes a lot of work. He has to dedicate himself to working with it. Many people with dyslexia can function extremely well if they work at it.

 

As for his diabetes, yes he is endangering his health, but I am sure he knows that too, and nagging is not going to change his behaviours until he is ready too. I am sure he has a doctor whom tells him exactly how he should be taking care of himself, and the information is there. It may be he is just not prepared to accept or live his life differently at this point....

 

As I said, it's great to be supportive, and let him know you are there if he ever needs a hand, BUT...do not nag him about it. Because honestly, that will make him even less receptive to help.

[serenity85]

Thanks guys i dont lecture or nag him cos he gets that from his sisters and mum i try to suggest oh if u do this then maybe it will work out better because etc... but yeh thanks for the advice people much appreciated