bballplaya4814 Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 It sure seems like it, theres this girl whos just perfect she's everything and i'm "not her type" thats how it is with everyone, and i just feel like i'm never gonna find anything and i know the replies are gonna be "don't worry you hav the rest of your life" and "you'll find someone" but more than 90% of the people have at least had a girl friend by now, and i barely even have friends, i just feel horrible and bawling my eyes out, someone say something... Link to comment
NKP Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 You dont need a girl in your life to be happy. Have you tried meeting people online iv meet a few people are they are great Link to comment
bballplaya4814 Posted July 24, 2006 Author Share Posted July 24, 2006 thats how i met her she lives 45 minutes away, and i-----i am gonna die alone-ok someone kill me now i can't take my life like this anymore, i can't live a life like this Link to comment
theproman23 Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 Well the truth is things will happened when they happened, I've accepted that. I am in a similar boat, i've never had a gf till about 5 months ago, I am 22 and I want to experience a realtionship. My want for a realtionship drove me to being dumped. I settled and overlooked so many things because I wanted a GF so bad. Now that I had my first gf, I realized a lot of things about myself most of all that there are other girls and I am seeing things in a different way. I am gonna let things happened. Don't worry, when you find the right person you'll know it. It's been 3 weeks since I got dumped and I am feeling better about things and looking at the experiecne as something to lear from. Depending on how old you are, and if you are anywhere as old as I am we have so long left and there are so many other things we should experience. Things will be ok, do things you enjoy and keep yourself happy cause once you settled down you'll wish you had that freedom so enjoy it while you have it. Link to comment
bballplaya4814 Posted July 24, 2006 Author Share Posted July 24, 2006 yeayeayea thats what everyone says- Link to comment
NKP Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 Well meet some more people, give it time you will find the right ONE for you soon, it takes time, love isnt just given to people streight away Link to comment
bballplaya4814 Posted July 24, 2006 Author Share Posted July 24, 2006 yea, but how do i know that right now theres just a hole where my heart should be Link to comment
Kevin T Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 It sure seems like it, theres this girl whos just perfect she's everything and i'm "not her type" thats how it is with everyone, and i just feel like i'm never gonna find anything and i know the replies are gonna be "don't worry you hav the rest of your life" and "you'll find someone" but more than 90% of the people have at least had a girl friend by now, and i barely even have friends, i just feel horrible and bawling my eyes out, someone say something... I can understand your need for companionship, it's the way you were designed. God didn't make man to be alone. However! You sound like I used to. I'd become so down and depressed and lose sight of reality. As trite as it may sound, you'll be alone as long as you CHOOSE to be. Moreover, as long as you continue to choose to dwell on the negatives and play the role of the victim, you'll never find anyone. Women don't want to be around guys who are full of self-pity, despair and misery. They want to be with someone confident, fun and that makes them feel good. The good news is that CAN be you! Just stop thinking you'll never find anyone and START thinking you are someone great who can find the girl of his dreams! Believe me, it works wonders. It's true; what you believe about yourself, your future, your lovelife and your destiny will all come to pass exactly as you believe - be it good... or bad. So why not choose to stop feeling sorry for yourself and start believing you CAN find a great woman and be happy! To recap, no one is meant or destined to be alone. Whether they are aware of it or not, they choose it based on their own self-beliefs. Hence, change your beliefs and change you change your future. So stop being so negative! (I've been there and done that; don't follow in my footsteps!) Link to comment
NKP Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 Love takes time, everything happens for a reason Link to comment
bballplaya4814 Posted July 24, 2006 Author Share Posted July 24, 2006 ok thanks guys! Link to comment
doyathink Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 am i just meant to die alone? Maybe! Maybe most of us here will! I'm married (for just a few days longer) and to tell you the truth, I'm lonelier now than when I was single! Just because someone has a partner doesn't mean they don't hurt or feel lonely! Link to comment
bballplaya4814 Posted July 24, 2006 Author Share Posted July 24, 2006 o jee that makes me feel good saying that maybe i AM meant to die alone, jeez... Link to comment
NKP Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 Hey you came here looking for help, so dont get all * * * *y at the people here just trying to help you, if you dont want help why come here then Link to comment
Kevin T Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 It's a fact that people usually feel lonely after a big event in life; be it marriage, the death of a loved one, moving somewhere new, having a baby (yeah, it's true), but it's only temporary and doesn't last as a rule. And as I said, if you choose to die alone... you will. The choice is yours, friend. Link to comment
bballplaya4814 Posted July 24, 2006 Author Share Posted July 24, 2006 thanks kevin, you rawk! lol i will try to be as positive as possible and believ i can get the woman of my dreams! thanks! Link to comment
Shyguy24 Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 This guy will definitely die alone with his sarcastic replies ... Link to comment
doyathink Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 o jee that makes me feel good saying that maybe i AM meant to die alone, jeez... All I am saying is; who knows what your destiny is! We could all very well die alone then again we may all find the person of our dreams, one never knows the road that life will take. Be proactive in your life, know where you want to be and then strive to be that! While we would like to think you will find true love, we don't know YOU really so it's hard to say for sure. If I asked you if you think I will be rich in a year what would you tell me? Link to comment
Momene Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 You don't say how old you are but I didn't have sex until i was 20 or a steady relationship until I was 23. My luck changed when I reached my 30s! Link to comment
Johnathan Posted July 24, 2006 Share Posted July 24, 2006 The trick is to stop wanting it so badly. I've learned in life that when you stop looking for something, whether it be a great girl or your spare house key, you will then stumble upon it at a random time. Every girl I've been involved with landed in my lap (literally) when I least expected it and didn't care. 99% of the time when I'm looking for something, like my phone, etc., I didn't find it until after I said "forget it" and stopped looking for it. I always find long lost stuff when I least expect it. It's not a coincedence. Link to comment
Kevin T Posted July 25, 2006 Share Posted July 25, 2006 You'd be further off actively looking for a mate than sitting around not expecting it. "Seek and ye shall find..." Link to comment
NKP Posted July 25, 2006 Share Posted July 25, 2006 This guy will definitely die alone with his sarcastic replies ... __________________ I agree no wonder no one wants to be with him Link to comment
Managor Posted July 25, 2006 Share Posted July 25, 2006 I agree no wonder no one wants to be with him The guy's frustrated, even though he shouldn't take it out on people trying to help him, still cut him some slack Anyway, to reply to the OP, I'm in the same boat as you. How old are you? Do you socialize, go to parties, and so on? If not, then chances are you won't find new friends or potential girlfriends. Do you put effort into your appearance, and other aspects to increase the chances of finding someone? You can't sit back and complain until someone falls for you, 'cause chances are it won't happen in that situation. Link to comment
Luigi Posted July 25, 2006 Share Posted July 25, 2006 Hello, all. I think it may be helpful as well as interesting to look at relationships in a different way. I guess we have all been through many relationships, learnt this or that technique, suceeded and failed, but chances are we are still pretty confused about the whole thing. For many of us, our past experience, if anything, is just making us wonder whether that which we are looking for really exists. Instead of looking at relationships as a way to complete ourselves by finding something or someone who can give us what our mind says it's lacking in our lifes (i.e. a feeling of being attractive, a way out of our solitude, sex, etc.), wouldn't it make a world of difference to use our relationships as a way by which to know ourselves better? If I got to know this "mind" of mine more thoroughly, wouldn't perhaps that be the same as understanding what not to do and who not to be in future relationships so that a new outcome is possible, in the world of my relationships as much as anywhere else? Author Guy Finley says that "for the person to whom and in whom self knowledge begins to become a living force, there can be no such thing as a bad day or a bad relationship. It's impossible, because everything that happens to us as self-working men or women is used for the purpose it was created… which is help us discover our actual condition. Then, the whole of the world and all of its whirling and confusing relationships provides us an opportunity to change the whole of our lives." Now, that really seems like good advice to at last start enjoying different relationships with people and events, doesn't it? To me, advice, techniques, tips, etc. given out so that we can lure others into satisfying our desires sounds quite manipulative and selfish. No wonder when the excitement fades and we've satisfied our need, the whole relationship starts falling apart. I am sure we can all relate to that, can't we. What I am sharing with you has helped me to change the way I relate to others. Perhaps the idea of more authentic relationships, less selfish and more conscious, is really the true way to go. Only we have given very little thought to it up until now. Here is a great link removed that I'm sure will give you a better understanding. I hope this helps. Luis Link to comment
yummy Posted July 26, 2006 Share Posted July 26, 2006 You don't need a girlfriend for you to be happy, of course its still a big a part of your happiness but you don't have to depend your happiness with someone. Learn how to ove yourself first. You also don't have to be sad about it, I believe that every one of us has his/her own destiny and there's someone rightfully meant for you. So just wait.. If she said she doesnt like you its fine, maybe she's really not for you. Link to comment
Juha Posted July 26, 2006 Share Posted July 26, 2006 IS it better off just to be with someone so you are not alone??? Even if you are only accepting what you can get... Being with someone who does not do it for y ou is as bad or worse than being alone... Being alone is different than being lonely...Being comfortable alone is something we all have to do, being alone is not... There are plenty of people out there to be with, you do not have to be serious with them. Just date and hang out with them until you can find someone you want to be with and if you don't find someone special then at least you have are not sitting home alone... May not be perfect and does not fill me up inside but it is better than sitting home... Link to comment
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