CynicalGuitarist Posted July 20, 2006 Share Posted July 20, 2006 How do you get rid of feelings you have for a particular girl who would never like you back and you have no chance whatsoever with? Need help because I feel very ](*,) right now. Link to comment
melrich Posted July 20, 2006 Share Posted July 20, 2006 That's tough, unrequited love. You can't really just make feelings go away. They either fade with time and circumstances or hang around to piss you off forever. Link to comment
PRSOV Posted July 20, 2006 Share Posted July 20, 2006 Time heals all wounds... Some wounds leave a scar Link to comment
CynicalGuitarist Posted July 20, 2006 Author Share Posted July 20, 2006 That's tough, unrequited love. You can't really just make feelings go away. They either fade with time and circumstances or hang around to piss you off forever. Too true, but thanks for at least being honest. Link to comment
coollady1957 Posted July 20, 2006 Share Posted July 20, 2006 That's tough, unrequited love. You can't really just make feelings go away. They either fade with time and circumstances or hang around to piss you off forever. I agree, that you can't make those feelings go away. The best you could do would be just to get out and socialize with your friends and possibly meet a new girl. IN time those feelings and thoughts about this girl will become less and less most likely. I know it is difficult to put it out of our mind, but I honestly think it will get better for you. Link to comment
PRSOV Posted July 20, 2006 Share Posted July 20, 2006 Go easy on yourself, and I certainly wouldn't beat yourself up over it emotionally as so many of us do. There are plenty more fish in the sea... Link to comment
friscodj Posted July 20, 2006 Share Posted July 20, 2006 Well, for me, I don't accept the answer that "she would never like me back" and "I have no chance with whatsoever" so easily. Why do you think this? What happened? If there's been no history established between us, walking away and moving on is much easier than if we had an intimate relationship together. That happens relatively quickly and on it's own. What has worked for me in the past to get over someone I was intimate with and dumped is to chase after this girl until I got so fed up with the situation that I ended up having the decision beat into me to walk away. Link to comment
CynicalGuitarist Posted July 20, 2006 Author Share Posted July 20, 2006 Well, for me, I don't accept the answer that "she would never like me back" and "I have no chance with whatsoever" so easily. Why do you think this? What happened? If there's been no history established between us, walking away and moving on is much easier than if we had an intimate relationship together. That happens relatively quickly and on it's own. What has worked for me in the past to get over someone I was intimate with and dumped is to chase after this girl until I got so fed up with the situation that I ended up having the decision beat into me to walk away. She wouldn't like me back because I'm a boring, uninteresting weirdo with no charm, bad skin, and short height. She deserves MUCH better. Worse yet, I've been really really lonely lately so I've been sick in my body and mind. Not to mention these feelings are readily multiplying. Link to comment
PRSOV Posted July 20, 2006 Share Posted July 20, 2006 She wouldn't like me back because I'm a boring, uninteresting weirdo with no charm, bad skin, and short height. She deserves MUCH better. Worse yet, I've been really really lonely lately so I've been sick in my body and mind. Not to mention these feelings are readily multiplying. Is that really your reason? Does she know how you feel about her? I'm sorry but thats a really poor excuse. All those things that you have listed above are all just negative thoughts that are stuck in your head... If you have some confidence in yourself and let her know how you really feel then you may be pleasantly surprised. I am almost certain she wouldn't think these things because they are all just 'hate myself' thoughts. PR Link to comment
CynicalGuitarist Posted July 20, 2006 Author Share Posted July 20, 2006 Is that really your reason? Does she know how you feel about her? I'm sorry but thats a really poor excuse. All those things that you have listed above are all just negative thoughts that are stuck in your head... If you have some confidence in yourself and let her know how you really feel then you may be pleasantly surprised. I am almost certain she wouldn't think these things because they are all just 'hate myself' thoughts. PR No way in hell am I going to play emotional Russian Roulette and let her know so soon. She'll think I'm either a. a playboy or b. a creepy stalker. I'm in bad emotional shape right now and can't exactly risk another rejection. Sigh... maybe I should just leave this country period. Link to comment
friscodj Posted July 20, 2006 Share Posted July 20, 2006 She wouldn't like me back because I'm a boring, uninteresting weirdo with no charm, bad skin, and short height. She deserves MUCH better. Worse yet, I've been really really lonely lately so I've been sick in my body and mind. Not to mention these feelings are readily multiplying. If this is how you feel, you shouldn't be focusing on meeting women right now, you should be focusing on you... Life is too short for this **** man. Go out and freaking live your life dude. Find and pursue some passions that really make you feel alive. In doing so, you'll start defining yourself through these passions and not through your shortcomings. Focus on this and not meeting women right now dude... Aside from that, no one is perfect and what you might view as an imperfection might be perceived by a woman as a cute quirk. Someone once told me in relation to this is, "There is a lid for every jar". That really stuck with me because it's true. I see physically beautiful woman all the time walking around with guys who could be consider less physically beautiful... Link to comment
CynicalGuitarist Posted July 20, 2006 Author Share Posted July 20, 2006 If this is how you feel, you shouldn't be focusing on meeting women right now, you should be focusing on you... Life is too short for this **** man. Go out and freaking live your life dude. Find and pursue some passions that really make you feel alive. In doing so, you'll start defining yourself through these passions and not through your shortcomings. Focus on this and not meeting women right now dude... Aside from that, no one is perfect and what you might view as an imperfection might be perceived by a woman as a cute quirk. Someone once told me in relation to this is, "There is a lid for every jar". That really stuck with me because it's true. I see physically beautiful woman all the time walking around with guys who could be consider less physically beautiful... "There's a lid for every jar" I must admit, that's a pretty good soundbyte. However, after watching my parents divorce when I was 4, my mom go through more boyfriends than I can count, my dad practicly dying alone, and my own failure of a love life, I'm not so sure if that's true. I know several guys around my age or older who are all alone and depressed because of it (even if they won't admit it). I'm not so sure that there is someone for everyone. Link to comment
PRSOV Posted July 20, 2006 Share Posted July 20, 2006 Your an 18 year old male! Taking rejection is all a fact of life and if you really like her that much then I think you would be willing to take the chance and tell her how you really feel. If you ponder in a pool of depression telling yourself you should leave the country, your ugly and she would never go out with you then your right and you will 95% likely to achieve those things. Link to comment
friscodj Posted July 20, 2006 Share Posted July 20, 2006 "There's a lid for every jar" I must admit, that's a pretty good soundbyte. However, after watching my parents divorce when I was 4, my mom go through more boyfriends than I can count, my dad practicly dying alone, and my own failure of a love life, I'm not so sure if that's true. I know several guys around my age or older who are all alone and depressed because of it (even if they won't admit it). I'm not so sure that there is someone for everyone. After reading this, I think you absolutely need to forget about women and focus on yourself. There are a lot of things you wrote here that a pro counselor could help you out with... Link to comment
iamteddybearfeelmecuddle Posted July 20, 2006 Share Posted July 20, 2006 She wouldn't like me back because I'm a boring, uninteresting weirdo with no charm, bad skin, and short height. She deserves MUCH better. Worse yet, I've been really really lonely lately so I've been sick in my body and mind. Not to mention these feelings are readily multiplying. I would disagree with that. Probably the most likely reason that she wouldn't like you back is that you have a defeatist's attitude. After that she probably wouldn't like you because you've made no effort to let her know how special she is to you. Link to comment
CynicalGuitarist Posted July 20, 2006 Author Share Posted July 20, 2006 After reading this, I think you absolutely need to forget about women and focus on yourself. There are a lot of things you wrote here that a pro counselor could help you out with... I know... I do have an appt. with an adult psychiatrist on Aug. 23rd, no thanks to Kaiser and their lousy scheduling. I had problems that made even my previous psychiatrist irked off trying to help me. Link to comment
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