What am I lacking?

[Waterlily]

hi,

 

First of all, this post isn't supposed to sound like a pity party at all, but if it ends up turning into a "oh god, I'm soooo unhappy" message, please just don't read it...

Recently, one of my closest friends met a guy at a party, and they are getting to know each other better this week. She seems excited with it, and tells me what they do together, what he tells her, that he calls her and wants to be with her. And that's why I begun to wonder what the hell is wrong with me.

 

i'm in my mid-20s and have never felt this kind of interest towards me - no one has ever asked me out, and admired me as a woman. I've been told I'm a good and loyal friend, but never that I was worth being in love with. It makes me so sad when I hear my friends telling me how were their dates, I just try to pretend I'm not feeling miserable.

I've told them that I had a boyfriend, made up a story about how we had met, and how we broke up, just not to sound even more pathetic. All the guys I once liked were in love with someone else and didn't really cared I existed.

I lack someone with me so badly it hurts. I came home and cry, because it's been so long. I feel incomplete and incompetent .People have told me thousand times that the right person will appear when I least expect, but 10 years of waiting is just to much.I'm tired of seeing couples getting together in front of me.

I don't consider myself psysically repugnant, but I'm not pretty at all. My girl friends always tell me there's nothing wrong with my appearance, but I know that it must be.

I'm not extremely talkative, rather shy, but I think my social skills are not so bad .

 

What is wrong with me? Why can't I feel loved, and admired as a woman?

[Progressive]

Hi Waterlily,

 

I don't want to go over what Swingfox has said because it does seem very good advice! It IS just something that you have to "wait over" and yes being the shy one in a group can make you feel even worse. You dont feel loved so you dont say much to people and you get into that downwards spiral that never seems to end

 

its mostly going to be confidence that needs boosting, if you gain more confidence in yourself then you start being more out-going, the more outgoing you are the more people start to notice and the more you are noticed the more chance you have of finding that special someone.

 

What I WILL say however, is just because someone shows intrest in you, please don't think "Oh, this is the only person!! my only chance" and go along with it all if YOU don't want them. Take it slowly, DO be fussy, find that someoe that you'll love forever then grab them