Really Scared And Nervous

[Dogg]

hello all, this is the first tiome I think that I am poisting about something other than my ex so here it goes. I have been bullied and beaten down at my current job for this entire year thus far. This fact along witht he whole breakup with my ex thing has undoubtedly made this the worst year of my entire life and has more or less sucked the life right out of me. I am a teacher and always have been, but in the "carreer world" I am just starting as this was my first "full time" position although I have had leave replacements and such. I have just really detested every waking minute of this job and can't wait until its over!!!!! Anyway here is my dilema....I'm not sure if I want to teach anymore! The terrible experineices with my current job have made me detest even the thought of doing this again! I know that there are other postitions that would not be like my current position, but at the same time, I live in NY and the job market is terrible atthe moment so much so that for an elementary position on average there are abotu 600 applicants.

 

I have been considering trying to see what else I may be qualified to do outside the field of education but when I sit and think about it, I realize that I have never been anything else and thereforeeee do not know anything else and that worries me. what if I am not qualified to do anything else!!!! I am at apoint in my life where I cvan not really afford to "start over" due to personal expenses and such and I'm really scared that if I try to go outside the field of educatioin, that I will find that I am not qualified to do anything aside from completely starting over. Also, I feel as though if I give up on education that I am a "quitter" but at the same time, I feel as if I have never ever given myself the opportunity to go outside the field and see if there is maybe something that I may enjoy more and be good at. I suppose that I am at a cross roads and that I am just really afraid of failure becaus it seems that as of lately (this entire year and maybe a bit longer) that that is all that I have done in my own eyes: Failed.

 

Does anyone have any suggestions or experience feeling the same way or any suggetsions as to what I should do??????

[kellbell]

Hey Dogg!

 

Yes, I absoutely know what you mean and how you feel. I have a Master's in Psychology and I work for an prestigious hospital that generates millions of dollars in a year for research. I work on a research grant and have been here for three years. I felt yes, now I have the education AND experience. I am ahead of the game.

 

Well, I have decided to relocate to a different state and get the heck out of New England and move out west. I have had two interviews. However, I received tons of letters rejecting me as well. Sheesh, I have a Master's and experience. It really scared me and then I started to doubt myself and my whole life career decision. Questioning did I go the right direction, did I waste my time and money? It does leave a person in a bad place, full of self-doubt.

 

But I have decided to look for work once I get out there. I have been keeping my eye out for job availability and it looks promising. I want to get settled first. Have you thought about re-locating? It seems out west is where it is at. Lots of opportunities and the cost of living is definitely lower. I would not give up your teaching career instead perhaps spreading your wings out a little. Thoughts?

[annie24]

Hi - I am sorry you're not posting under happier circumstances.

 

What about applying to teach in other areas? would you be willing to move?

 

I don't know much about teaching, but are there other certifications that you could get that could increase your chances of being hired? what about teaching at the middle or high school level?

 

good luck

[Dogg]

I have thought about thos ethings that the both of you above have mentioned, but each would more or less take going back to school and no, I do not want to move out of the NEw York Area! Do you really think that it is a bad move to try and see what else I may be capeabvle of doing? I mean I have always been on the track to education and never really explored what my other options may be. I think that I may really want to nknow if I have nay other skills....

[annie24]

are you sure you don't want to move? I know that you've had a hard time with your breakup. A lot of people (And I mean A LOT!!!!) have found they have an easier time with the breakup if they move somewhere new and start all over again.

 

why not go back to school for a while? part time?

[kellbell]

Dogg,

 

Any particular reason why you do not want to move out of New York? If the job market is extremely stiff there and you are not happy with your circumstances, sometimes you have to go where things happen and not things come to you.

 

Is there any books out there available to help your current situation? Perhaps you need to be a little flexiable about matters.

[Dogg]

The reason that I do not wnt to move out of new yourk is becauseu I really like it here, I love the city and I love where I live! I feel as though I have been stru8ggling with the feeling that IU have made a bvad decision in choosing teaching ever since I actually chose it, I almost feel as though I made the decision to make others happy and never really thought about myself and these feelings came much more to the forefront after I got my masters degree and realized how difficult, and stressful it was and has been to even get a job in the field. I truly think that I need to see what else I may be capeable of and what things I may be good at as well as to simply see what things may make me happy and that I may truly be interested in, none of these things IU have had the chance or the willing mnness to do. Another reason that I can not move away aside from the fact that I just do not want to is that I currently am in no financial position to do so. My current position has proveded me with MUCH more overwhelming stress than it has money so I am pretty much broke and just barelyt holding my head above water.

[kellbell]

Dogg,

 

What kinds of things are you interested in? What do you see yourself doing? I have known many people whom choosen a career to make others happy but they are miserable where they are. That cannot be good. Also, I know of others whom choosen a career simply because they are good at it and it comes easily but are not happy either.

 

Go for what makes you happy and not what others are happy with. If you are truly miserable teaching then by all means, try another angle.

[Dogg]

Its not that I am miserable in teaching, although I am MORE THAN MISERABLE IN MY CURRENT POSITION (which I have already resigned from) its just that I am beginning to feel that I need to get my "life" started and witht he way that the job market is right now, I may be left waiting adn not obtaining another job in the field for next year which would leave me with nothing and I can't have that. I was thinking that over the summer (while I work at a summer camp) that I would explore other opportunities by going to a headhunter and seeing what if anything I may be qualified to do. Maybe I will find something that I enjoy more than teaching????? maybe not but at least I will have tried and will not be left asking myslef what might have been. I just don't know what I'm good at or could be good at and it scares me tho think that if I am not a teacher, then WHAT AM I?????? I have never done anything else, nor have I attempted to. I am so scared of being a failure, so scared of being somethign that I never wanted to be which is NOtHING!!!!!!!!!

[kellbell]

Dogg,

 

A headhunter is a great idea. Try going that route and see what comes out of it. Sometimes we like our job, but we do not like the environment. That happens quite bit. Try the headhunter and see what happens. Good luck.