She sent me this email after 2 months of break up i need help

[skyfen143]

Who understands what she really means please let me know. i dont really understand. thanks

 

 

 

Hello my honey,

 

there are so many times I wanted to tell you something, but I feel it

won't

do us any good. When I tried so hard to hold it back, I'm depressing

myself

also. So I think it's better for me just tell you and make our

feelings

clear.

 

Even though I'm with the new guy now, some times I still feel I love

you

more than him. Maybe because he treat me so well that's one of the

major

reason why I stay with him now. I even told him that.

 

There were many times I even thought to go back with you. But I'm so

afraid

that we might end up with those same problems. Also I feel bad that I

actually left you and went on with an other man. Plus I don't know if

he

can handle this. Either way, I will feel guilty and won't be able to

set my

self in true happiness. I can't be that selfish, and shouldn't

neither.

 

I don't know what you gonna think about what I told you here. The only

thing we can blame might be that we were not mature enough, both of us.

Some times I even feel that I might break up with him in few years and

end

up single or go back with you again. No one really know what's going

to

happen in the future. But one thing's for certain, I still love you,

as i

told you before, cause you will always be my first love.

 

Anyway, happy easter!

[SilverCloud]

she is testing water with you. i wouldnt even bother replying her email. First of she is right she broke of with you, but then she keeps saying how terrible it was with you. Just let her go, she is not only driving the guy she is with crazy but also you. Keep your sanity..

[Bethany]

She's with another guy and you should not reply. She seems to be thinking things over and it would be in your best interest to not reply. I doubt if she will dump him and come back to you even if you did reply so don't take the risk.

 

Also, don't add to her confusion and reply, and don't read that getting back together is on the cards and that's why she sent it. It was her own personal thoughts and she should never have sent it.

 

You may even get another email with her apologising for sending it, trying to take it all back and asking you to ignore her, because now it's done she will be feeling guilty to the new guy and will be even more messed up than before.

[keefy1972]

"Some times I even feel that I might break up with him in few years and end

up single or go back with you again. No one really know what's going to

happen in the future."

 

Wow, who says you're going to be there for her? Maybe it's just me but she seems a little too confident that you're going to be there. Not good.

 

I would reply simply by saying, "I wish you the best. Don't fret as I will be just fine. Take care".

 

Nothing more than that. She seems to need to be knocked down a peg or two.

[skyfen143]

thanks guys, i dont think i will reply.... by the way the new guy is ugly and 8 years older than her. i feel bad for her.

[Bethany]

Don't feel bad for her, she's the one who dumped you and WANTS to be with him, not you.

To be honest I feel sorry for him, he has no clue what she is doing behind his back.

[sweetface0221]

This seems as though she "Wants Her cake and eat it too" This is so unfair to you. You should not answer any calls or send a response back to her

[skyfen143]

hi, i blocked her email, screenname and everything. the only way she can do is call my cell. am i doing the right thing? thanks

[Bethany]

Yup.

 

Now move away from the computer and get on with life, keep busy and get out of the house more. It will do you so much more good than sitting at home depressed wondering if you have done the right thing. If you feel that you cannot cope or feel the need to get in touch with her, sign in on HERE instead. Read NC threads and how it works, whatever it takes.

 

She KNOWS where you are and what she has to do if she wants you back. She HAS to miss you before she comes back and she isn't going to do that if you're always there for her.It will just go on and on and things wont change if you don't. Let her miss you.

[Boricua7]

hi, i blocked her email, screenname and everything. the only way she can do is call my cell. am i doing the right thing? thanks

 

Yes you are.

 

She has no right to come back to you stirring up old feelings. You didn't work and that's it. She feels bad for having dumped you, she said so herself, and now she just wants you to say something to make her feel better. Her relationship with this new guy is doomed because the poor guy has no idea that she does not really care for him and that she's already thinking about dumping him in the future. This is not something you want to deal with.

[PocoDiablo]

Oh yeah, that was a total test. If you replied, you would have failed, she would have played with your brain, led you on, and them dumped you in short order. This is fairly common in my experience.

 

Hold your head up and take a step forward!

[skyfen143]

oh i forgot to tell you guys i am her first boyfriend and i am much better looking and younger than her new bf.... i am in college i believe her new bf didn't even finished college.

[disruptors]

For sure do not reply. It makes me angry that she could send that to you! Stay strong and if you need a really good NC thread here's one that really helped for me.

[skyfen143]

what if i am doing NC and she wants me back? what should i do?

[bobo85]

There seems to be something with that 2 month mark that gets the ex's to think if they really made the right choice. Anyways she's just emailing you to see if you would respond and if you still love her or have any feelings towards her. I would not respond to her email. The email had no direct questions so there is no need to reply with answers. She is just hoping that you will reply saying that you still love her and that you will always miss her cuz she's your first love. Its basically gonna make her feel good about herself. Dont REPLY, especially if she's still with her new flame.

 

Keep doing NC and make sure that enough time has passed for her to see what a huge mistake she has made before you act on anything. Second if she contacts you do not answer or reply unless she leaves a message and asks for you guys to "talk". And even when this happens, it'll probably be okay to meet her but keep your guard up. When she's talking listen to what she has to say. Let her lead. Then by the way she is talking and her body language, evaluate why she really wants you back. Is it just because she is lonely and has no one else or is it because she truly loves you and know it was a mistake.

 

Remember the quote: "hurt me once shame on you, hurt me twice shame on me"

[skyfen143]

okie, i did a very bad thing. i let my friend read my letter and wrote this back to her. tell me if i am so screwed now.

 

You THINK you still love me? You broke up with me and chose not to be with me. Now you are with someone else and telling me about it. I don't know what to say. Happy Easter? Sometimes just hearing from you upsets me. I guess there were things that bothered you but you didn't talk to me about them. Now you are with someone else.

 

You are with someone else....

[Bethany]

It''s not that bad. In fact, it's telling her everything you needed her to know but not 'emotional', so well done for that.

 

But now it's done, it's time to be strong and stick to what you wrote and NOT contact her again.

[Boricua7]

I don't think you're screwed just don't do it again.

 

You may have given her just the fuel she needed for her fire but I doubt it.

 

Like I said before: DON'T CONTACT HER AGAIN.