on the other foot

[sabena]

You know I have been reading all the problems for a while now, and now that the tide has turned for me, and it's me waiting for that call...it's so very hard.

 

It's so easy for everyone to tell people to wait and just chill, but living it is so very hard, I almost know that he will call me, arrange to meet up and then end it and it feels such a cruel way to do it. I loved this guy with all my heart and for some reason he can't make it and I respect and understand that, just like i know this time next month I will start to heal and this time 3 months I will be better, but I will never forget him and will always hold a special place for him in my heart and life. I will miss him, his family and the friends that he brought me.

 

But this waiting is a killer, I am a student nurse in a hard year, and finding it even harder to put on a brave face when all I want to do is cry and hide away. I am 32 and all my friends are settled with families and now I have to try to find new friends who are single, and it's hard folks...not all of us find it easy to go out to new clubs and meet people... I am not the type to hurt myself but I can understand how saddened someone people might get with life and just want to sleep and never wake...

 

At the same time I know not to push him and to give him his space, but its so hard

[Goldie]

I know exactly what you mean!

 

 

 

I don't have the strength to go out and keep my mind busy but I'm forcing myself too! I'd rather stay at home with lots of chocolate and wine than face the world at the moment.

 

But life must and has to go on.

 

Sitting around and waiting for HIM to call is just a waste of time and we should be making HIM wait.

 

The strength I get from NOT calling him and getting by and getting out and doing my own thing comes from anger. It's not unhealthy anger. What I do is say to myself - 'How dare he expect me to wait around!!! IF and WHEN he does call I'll tell him I'm not ready' Hmph! And that's how I get my girl power

 

But there are times like last night when you feel hopeless, soppy and keep asking yourself what you've done wrong.

 

BE strong, like I am and keep snapping yourself out of these negative thoughts. Keep repeating to yourself in your head that you are good, kind, wonderful, strong and worthy...

 

No man must bring you down. Only YOU can control your life and happiness.

 

If you continue to feel like this you're just as bad as him and you only have yourself to blame.

 

What's the worse that could happen anyway? He will dump you? So what. Like you say it's only three months of getting over him and by then you might've found someone better!!!

 

Be positive. And keep posting on here coz it helps me so much.

 

Like for example, whenever I get the urge to call him I come on here and get nice people reminding me of my goals and aspirations.. It's healthy to share problems and it's normal too for you to be feeling this way.

 

But just force yourself to go out and see mates. Hell. Tonight, buy some wine, get drunk, watch a soppy girlie film, cry, weep, sob, chain smoke... whatever. Just get the sadness out of your system like I'm doing. And a stronger, happier you will emerge - whether you end up being single again or not!

 

Sod the men! We've got our own lives to live!!! Gxxx