Once again, Day One of NC

[xblondyx]

Well once again it's day one of NC. And that's because my ex talked to me.

 

I'll update it all again. Last night he noticed on my MSN name i had "I Cant Wait For Saturday meaning that my mum is taking me on a HUGE shopping spree (yey) for my holiday. Anyway, he IMd me, here's how the convo went

 

Him: so you've decided to come to the party on sat then?

Me: oh, no, i'm not sure yet

Him: oh, i thought thats what your MSN name was about

Me: no it's something else

Him: kk

Him: so are you coming?

Me: i'm not sure yet, i don't know anyone going

Him: is "S" not going?

Me: No

Him: is "AS" going?

Me: No

Him: is "N" going?

Me: No lol

Him: Is "A" going?

Me (getting very fed up): Um i'm not sure. She said she might go

Him: well there you go, someone for you to go with!

Me: lol

Him: kk

 

I was so confused over that convo. i mean, he kept looking for people that i could go with. Does that mean he wants me there?

 

Anyway today was fine. I was in his first lesson and he kept looking over and i caught his eye a few times but he kept looking away. What does it mean when a guy looks at you?

 

I then saw him again at lunch, where him and his friends sat behind me, which felt kind of strange.

 

I then saw him between lessons but he just walked straight passed me as if i wasn't there...twice.

 

He really confuses me! He talks to me on MSN (that's it, no face to face contact, no texts, phone calls, emails etc) and he looks at me but he blanks me when he walks passed me.

 

I had a huge urge to text him today when my guy friend "S" told my friend "A" that he heard that we were back together. I wanted to tell him that people thought that. I thought better of it and turned off my phone.

 

So what do you all think? I've posted so much about this guy so i know people must get bored of it, but i'm just very confused.

I feel like i'm getting over him a bit but sometimes i really miss him and want him back.

[evy38]

It's very simple, not complicated at all. If he wanted to be with you, he would be with you. Everything else is distraction. Move on with NC, for yourself.

[xblondyx]

Yeah, but some of my friends have said that he's just playing it cool and trying to get back into my good books first?

[evy38]

You can't read his mind, all you can do is take care of yourself, get over him, become a strong, capable and independent young woman. Then, if at some point he realizes his mistake, then YOU, not HIM, can decide if trying again is what YOU want. Stop worring about what he wants, start being kinder and more concerned about your own needs.

[xblondyx]

Ok. Thanks

[evy38]

Sorry if that came accross as tough talk, blondy. It's just I find many men will walk on a woman with no sense of who she is, or what she wants, because a woman with no sense of herself will put a man's needs before her own. That is a recipe to become a doormat. You are young, so start these relationships as you intend to continue them, as an equal. That means that when a man shows clear signs of no longer valuing you, show him the door.

[xblondyx]

I will. I am. I've not started talking to him for ages. It's him who starts the conversations. I know he misses me, his friends have told me. But i told them that i'm fine and that he told me to move on so i am. Will that totally put him off me?

[ElektraHere]

Blondy do you take everything his friends say as the gospel? I hope not. If he truly missed you and wanted to be with you.... UM I think he would be with you now. He is not and I also agree with evy NC NC NC!!!!

Block him on your MSN you can do that. It is your choice that you are still allowing the contact.

Cut all the strings and fly girl!!! Dont you ever wonder what it feels like to be free and to just fly on your own?

[xblondyx]

I've had 17 years of being free lol. I enjoyed being with him and i miss it

[ElektraHere]

GOOD GRIEF!! 17 years subtract 15 for growing up and that equals out to 2 years. This guy isnt the end all of guys. IF you choose to stay stuck in this rut then that is where you will be this evening, tomorrow, the day after, etc. No amount of posts asking for advice will get you out of it but you. It seems like you post and post about this boy and its the same thing over and over. Now I know you don't want to stay in this miserable spot do you? Come on if your friend were telling you all the things you have posted what would your advice be to her? MOVE ON there are many more fish in the sea.

[xblondyx]

I am trying and i know that your right and that your just trying to help. im just stubborn lol. sorry and thank you.

i do NC, i don't think about him, i'm getting on with everything. But it's just hard to see him EVERYDAY

[Diggitydave]

that is rough, i went through that. dated a girl a looonggg time ago that lived accross the hall, had to see her every day in college. Try studying for finals in that situation. (oh yeah, her new bf came over all the time and got all cuddly right outside my window. now i look back and laugh OUCH!

[xblondyx]

Yeah. I'm studying for my A Levels which are very important but with him popping up everywhere it's putting me off and i try to focus but he's in my line of vision and i just think HOW CAN YOU SIT THERE AND DO THIS lol

[xblondyx]

the main reason why i am so upset about the break up, is because i gave him my V. if i hadn't have done that, i don't think i'd be that upset

[ElektraHere]

Its a shame you did but you know what??? You can't change what already happened. All you can do is be more selctive with whom you decide to have that sort of relationship with. Make sure they are really worth it and worth you. Place some worth in yourself.

 

I would be pissed at him and not yourself. What a pig!

Get mad not sad and then mooove on sister!

[xblondyx]

Will do. Enotalone always makes me feel better i will get mad at him. He has been a jerk to me. I'm going to forget him. (i say this but it will be hard as i'll see him everyday) but i will try thanks

[xblondyx]

There's one thing i can thank this guy for though. When we were together, i wasn't getting along very well with my parents. But now since we've broken upm i've been getting along with them just fine as they are starting to respect my feelings as they know i'm going through a hard time, also we are spending more time together

[Caterina]

I'm glad your family and you are getting along. Get into your hobbies. I am really sorry this happened to you. Just stay away from him. It sucks that you have to see his sorry face. Start thinking about the negative things about him...and you haven't been doing NC, I know that for a fact because you only broke up a week and a half ago. True NC is NC. IT really hurts....but after the rains comes the sunshine! He is stringing you along. Don't go Saturday. Don't look for him. Make sure you have some major fun planned that day. Take each day at a time.

[xblondyx]

So you think i shouldn't go? I mean today, the person who's party it is came up to me and asked me to go because it would be nice to see me (haven't spoke to her much lately) so i said it might go

[Diggitydave]

I kinda think NC should be called SO. Starting Over. or MO, moving on. to me NC just has like an alcoholics anonymous or addiction recovery meaning to it. I just think starting over or moving on or something like that seems more positive.