gratefulpain Posted March 8, 2006 Share Posted March 8, 2006 Hi... I was dumpee, non-reparable damage done since she's seing someone else and has been intimate.... was living together 2 years. Been doing NC strict.. 4 weeks or so.... I can honestly say I care about her and I just want to know if shes ok... I feel like i want to know shes alright an healthy etc... not for any other reason.. I feel if I call she'll start into me about being childish by not even keeping in contact or trying to be friends or bring up the past (or worse mention new BF) , she once said i was being cruel and not making this easy by not answering calls text msg's etc... Part of me honestly just wants to know she's ok... am I askin for trouble? I did and probably still love her... Link to comment
SilverCloud Posted March 8, 2006 Share Posted March 8, 2006 Hi... I was dumpee, non-reparable damage done since she's seing someone else and has been intimate.... was living together 2 years. Been doing NC strict.. 4 weeks or so.... I can honestly say I care about her and I just want to know if shes ok... I feel like i want to know shes alright an healthy etc... not for any other reason.. I feel if I call she'll start into me about being childish by not even keeping in contact or trying to be friends or bring up the past (or worse mention new BF) , she once said i was being cruel and not making this easy by not answering calls text msg's etc... Part of me honestly just wants to know she's ok... am I askin for trouble? I did and probably still love her... The love does not leave easily, it because its love. Its not an on/off switch. But you have to realise that at this point to truly wish her well in her life you have to get better. Stick with the NC... it will give you understanding of you and more control over feeling need to unnecessarily bother the object of our affection. I know its harder then done, i too this day worry about my ex. But you know what they can take care of themselves, and we know that we just refuse to accept it. Time for you to take care of yourself. Link to comment
luvagain Posted March 12, 2006 Share Posted March 12, 2006 Stick with NC for a little while longer and then, depending on how you feel, contact her. If you talk her make sure to avoid the BF conversation and anything that will open the wounds. Link to comment
Nathalie1970 Posted March 12, 2006 Share Posted March 12, 2006 I vote for sticking with NC. Everything is still obviously painful for you. You are not anywhere near being over her. You know you are over her when she can talk about the current bf and you don't care. Good luck and be strong Link to comment
gratefulpain Posted March 12, 2006 Author Share Posted March 12, 2006 Thanks everyone... today I saw 3 caller Id's from her... I kep the house phone on silent during this time... so I'm not tempted... natalie youre right.. i'm not over it yet.... I been doing NC... but every now and again I say to myself "what kind of person would hold a person everynight, share everything, wake up with them every morning, etc.. then after the break up fall off the face of the earth?" I know you guys are telling me the best way... just feel like a heel sometimes... not even letting her know I'm alive or anything... just expressing... no need to reply... lyrics..(in my head) Lady, morning's just a moment away And I'm without you once again You laughed at me You said you never needed me I wonder if you need me now So many dreams that flew away So many words we didn't say Two people lost in a storm Where did we go? Where'd we go? We lost what we both had found You know we let each other down But then most of all I do love you still ~ Lionel Richie ~ Link to comment
dizziest Posted March 12, 2006 Share Posted March 12, 2006 With me, id be able to keep NC as long as I knew she still wanted to contact me but as soon as she stopped trying to get in touch I would miss it and thats when its hardest to keep NC. Thats what happened to me, I was the dumpee and I was lied too its been 6 months since I last saw her but about 1 month since I told her to stop getting in touch/trying to get me back and after 1 month I now miss her and want to hear from her... We both just need to be strong and keep NC. Link to comment
Orlander Posted March 12, 2006 Share Posted March 12, 2006 Wrap your head around something else. Reading a good book does it for me. I've been in NC with my ex for a month now. We saw each other at a local bookstore. I said hi as I passed and kept walking. That was a month ago and if I saw her today, I would do the same thing. Orlander Link to comment
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