Said Goodbye...

[antigravity]

I've just had to force myself to say goodbye to someone I love. She's gone overseas to study for 3-4 years... We had plans to see each other (i'm travelling later in the year, but I'll have to come back to Australia) but it's gotten the point where I couldn't handle missing her anymore. I need to let go.

 

Because it hurts too much to hold onto something I may never have again.

 

One part of me wants to hold on no matter what pain comes along with it because of that small chance we'll be able to hold each other again. Look into each others eyes, feel each others skin. Feel each others love again.

 

The other part is saying that, that may never happen again, and is the pain worth it? Why am I putting myself through all this hurt? She's travelling around the world, doing what she truly loves. Her first priority is travel. My first priority is her. That's not really fair. All I think about is her, is she ok? Is she having fun? Has she met someone else? Is she going to call me, or email me? All these thoughts are just too much. I can't do it to myself.

 

I love her more than anything... And I always will. She's opened my eyes to so many thoughts, and ideas. And I learnt so much about myself by knowing her. She helped me gain the courage to meet my father for the first time in 15 years. She held my hand as I made that call. I was shaking, and she was crying. I've never met a more beautiful person, and that's why I have to let go of her. She means so much to me that it hurts. And I can't handle the pain.

 

Have I done the right thing? Am I weak? Should I be stronger? What

[DN]

If her first priority is not you, then you have done the right thing. She may be all that you say she is, but if a relationship is to work it has to be balanced and this one obviously isn't. Take the time to heal and move on to someone who returns your love.

[annie24]

Hey - I think you did the right thing. It sounds like a case of really really bad timing. That's rough. At least, you know that there are amazing people out there, and if you found her, you'll find another girl who is also amazing. It may not seem like it now, but you will

[piggypooh]

As mach as it hurts, you did the right thing. Love should ONLY work when both of you are equally important to each other. I'm kind of in a similar situation myslef although its work not travel. If you have given her all and travel is still all she wants, then let her go.

 

On the plus side, If you are destined to be togetehr again, she MAY come back to you. Sometimes in a relationship, the feeling of being single and alone makes us appreciate our partners more. Make her feel that way. No promises but you did do the right thing.

[antigravity]

Yeah it was a damn hard thing to do. She gave me important things of hers to keep, so that I could give them back to her when we saw each other again.

 

I had to give them to her close cousin last night. Her cousin was really supportive, and had tears as I told her the story. She knows how much we love each other as she's close to both of us.

 

I think I still want her in my life, but I told her I need space, to get over her, and to let go of her. Once I do that, I'll email her, and get back in contact with her.

 

She's so amazing, she completely understood, and although she loves me (slept with my photo under her pillow... listened to a cd I made her everyday) she didn't argue, or try to convince me to do otherwise. I really do love her.

 

Just wish things could be different. But it's ok. I get upset and down from time to time, but Im dealing with this a lot easier than my past break up with my ex.

 

Thanks for the support guys