What just happened ? Im in shock

[Jonboy582]

Hello something SERIOUSELY big just happened. I came on MSN about 30 min aggo to be told by one of my best mates one of our friends has just DIED at the age of 18.

 

As you can imagin I am very shocked, bordering breaking down. I mean there is no solid proof and im hoping these are just roumers and unfounded. But what if there true? what about his family?.

 

I spoke to him 3 days aggo and now he is apparently dead, and there is a guestbook for all to sign who knew him.

 

 

 

This can't be. Fortunately for me I have not seen him in person for about 6 months but I still talk to him now and again online. And when he still went to school we were good friends and that never dies

[Jonboy582]

I have now been given the task of telling people at my school (his old school) that he is dead.

How do I do this?

When is the right time?

How will I stop myself crying?

[annie24]

Sure this is not a prank? Call his parents.

[coollady1957]

I agree with annie24, you need to do some verifying before this goes any further. You said there was no solid proof, so make a few calls and check out the validity of what you were told.

[make_up_your_mind]

if it is some prank, then wooow....thats not nice.

[Jonboy582]

Well I have spoken to his sister on the internet. And all his friends are leaving posts on that guestbook. I gues this is for real.

[annie24]

Umm... I think you should call and talk to the parents on the phone. Not over the internet. People play pranks all the time.

[coollady1957]

True people play some cruel tricks on people some times, and the internet is a prime source for alot of that. The guestbook may not be genuine. Just verify by actually speaking to some one, on the phone. I hope you find that this is not true of his dying.

[Jonboy582]

I dont have his home or mobile number as I lost it when I lost my mobile phone. And im pretty sure now this isnt a prank, but the only real way to tell is see how his little bro is tomorrow at school. And he isnt the type of person to do a prank like this its just not him. There is a memorial site for him and everything.

 

I should not refer to him in preasant tense but its so hard not to.

[coollady1957]

IF you find his sister on the internet again, maybe you could ask for a phone number to call their home and request to find out what is going on.

[Jonboy582]

I would but I really cant face upsetting her or the family like that. Especialy if its true which I strongly believe it will just tear them apart.

[darkblue]

Find out and make sure that this is not some sick prank.

But let's hope it is...

[annie24]

 

 

try looking up their number.

 

Don't call and ask if their son is dead. Just call say hi, ask to talk to their son. Say you're a friend.

[coollady1957]

I was about to suggest as annie24 did about calling phone number informations or looking it up on the internet to get a phone number. What did his sister say when you talked to her on the internet? Did she indicate he had died, or was she acting and talking normally? You need to verify some how what the truth is, since you keep saying you dont know for sure, and no solid proof yet, and you " guess its true". Dont make any assumptions, you need to verify this some how.

[make_up_your_mind]

Don't take offence....but if he is, God forbid, dead, when you find out, how did he die at such a young age?

[Jonboy582]

1. She is not her normal chatty self.

2. This is what she put.

[Jonboy582]

Don't take offence....but if he is, God forbid, dead, when you find out, how did he die at such a young age?

 

Well from what I have been told. He felt really rough and unwell then colapsed and fell unconscious. From there he never recovered and died.

[Jonboy582]

Its confirmed he is dead. They have yet to set a date for the funeral. I just can't cope. I have sat here at my computer for 6 hours strait basicaly doing nothing except stare blankly at the screen and use half a box of tissues. I really cant cope with going to school. And not meaningto sound atall selfish, I was behind in my work, now this is going to mess it all up. I can't work with him on my mind. I just want it all to end.

[RayKay]

It sounds like it might of been a brain hemorrhage/stroke....it's rare in younger people, but does happen. It can be pretty sudden. I had a boyfriend die at 25 years old from one, it was preceded by severe headaches and then a collapse, they did emergency surgery but he died in ICU.

 

I know another young girl whom died of similar too.

 

Sorry Anon about your friend, it is very hard to cope with a sudden loss like this, when it is out of nowhere, but you will be alright. Grieve, find support in others whom knew him, and even us here. Big hugs. Take some time, but also don't let this stop you from living YOUR life, that is the last thing he would of wanted. Instead live it to the fullest, as we all should I think.

[Jonboy582]

Yes it is hard. And a brain hemerage is what I thought may be the cause. He went to the doctor the day before complaining of sickness and headaches and maybe if he had made a correct judgement he would still be here. But I dont pass any blame as I and most others could never have made a different judgement and I hope his GP does not beat himself up over it also.

 

Funeral should be soon which I will attened with a couple of other friends and say my final goodbye's to the boy. Hopefully that will put soe closure on the pain for me and his friends and family.

[coollady1957]

I am truly sorry about your friend passing away. Its never easy to lose some one that you care about. Allow yourself to go through all the grief process. It will be healing in the long run. Lean on those closest to you, talk things out, speak of your friend and remember all the good times. I have lost friends, grandparents and a husband to death. I truly understand how you are feeling. You and his family are in my thoughts. Take care .

[RayKay]

Yes it is hard. And a brain hemerage is what I thought may be the cause. He went to the doctor the day before complaining of sickness and headaches and maybe if he had made a correct judgement he would still be here. But I dont pass any blame as I and most others could never have made a different judgement and I hope his GP does not beat himself up over it also.

 

Funeral should be soon which I will attened with a couple of other friends and say my final goodbye's to the boy. Hopefully that will put soe closure on the pain for me and his friends and family.

 

 

It is very hard to diagnose them. A great many people are born with some weaknesses in their brain's blood vessels, and elsewhere. Most will never have a stroke/aneurysm. But some do, and often without warning.

 

A persistent headache, unlike you have had before, can be an indication. My late boyfriend initially had a headache for 2 months straight before they finally found he had two blood clots on his brain. They "cured" that, but 6 months later he felt a headache again, scheduled an appointment with his doctor, but collapsed not long after that initial appt (which referred him to neurologist). By the time you collapse, it is often too late. Not always, but often.

 

The GP really might not have been able to know/diagnose it there, and he would of needed an MRI/CT scan to find it, and even then it can be missed if it is still small.

 

It is hard, but when it's sudden, there is just so little that can be done. It is pretty rare for it to happen, that it is not easy to diagnose in younger patients.

[darkblue]

That is just horrible news, Anon.

My heartfelt condolences to you, and his family.

 

It is so hard to explain tragedy at such a young age. Such a waste...

 

You know where I am.

[Jonboy582]

Yup I do Darkblue. And thanks everywone for your support. I am coming toterms with things now and looking forward to going to his funeral.

[coollady1957]

When do they plan to have his funeral services? I was only wondering because your friend passed away on Wednesday and today is Sunday. I know sometimes religious beliefs could be a reason for timing on funeral services, or either autopsy purposes may cause a delay.

It can be difficult to attend funerals, but it is a bit of closure in a sense. I am glad you are coming to terms with what has happened. Sometimes we have difficult times no matter what when the thought of our loved one comes up. Just remember to talk about it with those closest to you and that understand you. Recall the good times, the funny times, etc, Its quite healing.