mr weir Posted February 7, 2006 Share Posted February 7, 2006 My first posting! OK I would like a female viewpoint please. I split with my ex g/f 16 months ago and it ended in an unpleasant fashion. But I moved on by brushing the whole thing under the carpet. But in May she turned up and returned two books and some wine glasses. I'd forgotten she even had them! They were of no value or significance. Barely a word was spoken and she took off. Then for 6 months....nothing. But then she texted me out of the blue. Initially wanting answers to "what when wrong" and that she was angry. She included her new house phone number as she'd moved ( I didn't phone her ) But she phoned for a brief chat. Anyway we fell out and the texts stopped. She actually has a b/f but apparently is an on-off saga. Curious she never mentioned him once in her texts. They bought a flat together but he didn't move in. Instead he lives 20 miles away! Now, my ex has a 4 year old son and the curious thing is that this house is 5 metres from a v busy road. Not the actions of a man who wants children in his life! ( but not my business I suppose ) We bump in to each other now and again and the atmosphere is v awkward ie love/ hate/passion and butterflies etc However we never speak The big question is; was she after closure ( by handing back the books ) or has she failed to let go bearing in mind her current relationship is obviously is bad nick. Help! Mr Weir Link to comment
lil_mamarains13 Posted February 7, 2006 Share Posted February 7, 2006 I can say from experience that when a relationship goes wrong I would love to know what happened and what went wrong. She probably wanted the same thing. She needed closure and comfort of what happened and what she did so wrong that you decided to move on. I feel that way know since my fiance left me, and he won't give me closure. I have bouts of anger, sadness, lonliness and very much depressed. I will probably never know or understand what happened between us. It is how we heal and deal. I don't think I will ever call my ex to ask him what happened, but maybe at that point in time she felt she didn't have a choice because her pain and dispare was to much for her to handle. I'm not saying it was the right move on her part. The new guy is probably rebound. I don't really know for sure though. If they are on and off again it probably is or it is probably more of a friend she is carrying for comfort. She may not be allowing herself to feel much for him so it becomes a fight between them. Really not sure, but that is my opinion. I hoped it helped. Link to comment
DN Posted February 7, 2006 Share Posted February 7, 2006 Perhaps it might help if you said who broke up with who and why? Link to comment
mr weir Posted February 7, 2006 Author Share Posted February 7, 2006 I split from her because she was vain, a drama queen and possibly "psycho" However, she was lively, reasonable company and a wonderful lover!! But I got out early as I saw too many "red flags". Just curious why she chose to return worthless items 4 months after we split. My male friends said closure, female friends said that she was trying to see if I'd contact her. Thanks for the replies Link to comment
DN Posted February 7, 2006 Share Posted February 7, 2006 split from her because she was vain, a drama queen and possibly "psycho" Good decision. I would stick to it if I were you even if she did want to get back together. Link to comment
Tigris Posted February 7, 2006 Share Posted February 7, 2006 It sounds to me like she might want to get back together with you. From what you said earlier I would say that the cons outweigh the pros, however, the decision is yours. Good luck and take care. Link to comment
mr weir Posted February 7, 2006 Author Share Posted February 7, 2006 Thanks for all your replies. I've no intention of getting back with her. She's too unstable. Her current relationship has been on-off 2-3 times ( plus she allegedly fell pregnant then "lost" the baby ) It's just that never has anyone returned anything after we've split. But to move house then pass her number to me ( of all people ) spoke volumes. I'm sure she realises I was a stable future. Never mind ! Link to comment
DN Posted February 7, 2006 Share Posted February 7, 2006 Well, at least you got your stuff back and now she has no more excuses to contact you. Link to comment
Msnak Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 It was probably a "I want you back" test. But it sure has been a while!! Link to comment
NR498E Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 Tell her to get a lost.It sounds to me this relationship she is in know is on the skids and she is or was looking for a familiar set of arms to hold her.She doesnt want you she wants the comfort. Link to comment
mr weir Posted February 13, 2006 Author Share Posted February 13, 2006 I don't doubt that she would come back. but only till her wounds healed then she'd take off again. i don't deserve that. thanks for all replies Link to comment
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